


Down In A Hole

by ShameInYou



Series: The Staley-Hoon Family [1]
Category: Alice in Chains, Blind Melon
Genre: Drugs, Family Drama, M/M, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-26
Updated: 2014-08-29
Packaged: 2018-02-14 20:56:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 53,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2202831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShameInYou/pseuds/ShameInYou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shannon Hoon realizes that he needs to make things right with a flame from his past, Layne Staley, before it's too late.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is an mpreg. An mpreg is when two dudes can have a baby. Please don't let that stray you away from this story. It will be good, I promise.

Shannon leaned back in his seat and intertwined his fingers, resting them against his nose as he looked through the glass pane that separated he and the band. He bobbed his head a bit to the beat and then leaned forward, pressing one of the buttons up on the engineering board. He fiddled with the controls until he started hearing the sound he wanted to hear. Once the song came to an end, he pressed the stop button and pressed the intercom button to speak to the band.

"Good job guys. That's about it for today." He ran his hand through his short brown hair and then sighed and took his burgundy glasses off and rubbed his eyes.

He had been in his studio recording 10 hours straight with a new band he was producing, Unified Theory.

The band consisted of two guys that Shannon had been in a band with in the early 90's, Christopher Thorn and Brad Smith.

They came out from the recording booth to speak to Shannon for a bit.

Lining the walls of Shannon's small studio were albums that he had produced. Shannon had quit his band shortly after 1996. He had went to school to get the credits he needed to run his own recording studio and had decided to be a producer under his circumstances. Being a "rock star" in the limelight had become too much for him, and he had realized that there were more important things in life and that he had to get his shit together. Shortly after opening his recording studio, Shannon had scored deals to produce two major albums that had been very successful that year. Shannon was doing very well for himself.

The year was currently 2000, and he already had numerous bands lined up to produce records for. He had gained a lot of respect in the music industry from that aspect. He would always have people calling and wanting to interview him. The main question they would want to know was why he quit making his own music and decided to work behind the scenes. Sometimes the interviewer would trick Shannon and pretend they wanted to talk about his work with certain bands but steer the conversation in that direction. Shannon would always refuse to answer it. He had his reasons and they were personal.

After chatting with former band mates, they all left and Shannon closed up shop for the day. He walked outside and unlocked his car and got in and started it up.

The time was around 4 p.m. Shannon arrived at his mother's house to pick up his 6 year old daughter, Laina. Shannon didn't knock, just entered the house.

"Mom!? I'm here to get Laina!" He called.

The scurrying of feet could be heard and suddenly a little girl with curly blonde hair ran in the room. She hugged her daddy's legs and looked up at him.

"Hi daddy!" She chirped.

Shannon smiled as he looked down into bright blue eyes.

"Hey sweetheart." He scooped his daughter up and kissed her on the cheek. "Were you good for gramma today?" He asked.

She let out a giggle and nodded, wrapping her arms around Shannon's neck in a hug. Shannon turned around to see his mother walking towards him.

"Hey Shannon honey, how was work today?" She asked, kissing him on the cheek.

"It was fine mom. Laid down some good stuff. I didn't want to leave until they got it just right."

Shannon's mom smiled at him.

They carried on a conversation for a few minutes before Shannon left. He put his daughter in her car seat and they drove home.

* * *

For years it had been only Shannon and his daughter. He didn't have time for relationships, his main concern was the well being of Laina. She was the one who kept him going.

"Laina dear, I'm almost finished with dinner. Go to the bathroom and wash your hands!" Shannon called in the living room.

"Ok daddy!" He heard her call.

He fixed two plates and brought them into the living room. Laina skipped back and sat down and grabbed her fork and started eating her vegetables.

Shannon had cut all processed foods from his diet and he was teaching his daughter to eat healthy as well.

"So how was school today honey?" Shannon asked her as he sipped his water.

"Good." Laina said, resting her head in one hand and shoving food in her mouth with the fork in the other.

"Well that's so wonderful honey!" Shannon smiled.

His daughter was not much of a talker. She was very introverted already at a young age. Of course, at that age, it was kind of hard to carry on a serious conversation with a child anyway. The two finished up their meals and Shannon put their plates away in the dishwasher and cleaned up. He came back to the living room and sat on the couch and turned the TV channel to music news on MTV. Laina sat on the floor at the table, coloring in her coloring book, in her own little world.

Shannon was so relaxed that he almost fell asleep, until he heard the TV.

"In other news today, a photo of Alice in Chains singer Layne Staley has surfaced today. This picture was taken by his mother and it is him with his step-father."

Shannon snapped his head up to look. Layne Staley. He looked at the picture of Layne on the television and his heart just broke.

"Staley has not been on tour with Alice in 4 years. Sources say he rarely comes out of his Seattle Condo on 8th Avenue, pictured here. They also say he is heavily addicted to drugs and refuses to get help."

The TV suddenly flashed to Jerry Cantrell talking. "Well I tried to go over there and talk to Layne, but he just won't come out of his house. I tried everything man. I just can't help him if he won't help himself."

Shannon felt his eyes starting to tear up. He looked at little Laina coloring in her book. She was the spitting image of her father. That picture of Layne was ingrained in his brain. The poor man looked frail and skinny and sad.

After that news story, Shannon's head was gone the rest of the night. He put little Laina to bed and then sat up, looking on his computer. He found himself looking up Layne Staley, opening up old memories that he had put behind him.

Layne hadn't looked so good in that photo. He had found it online. Shannon started to think. He looked up the address for the condo that Layne was staying in. He wrote it down on a post it and pasted it to his computer desk and sighed, looking at it. He had to do the right thing. He didn't want his little girl growing up not knowing her father.

* * *

Laina cried as Shannon handed her to his mother. "She's been upset all day." Shannon pouted.

Laina didn't want Shannon to leave her. Shannon's mother kissed her head. "Honey your daddy's only gonna be gone for a day or so. That's not going to be very long, we're gonna have so much fun it will go by quick."

Laina still cried. Shannon looked at her and puckered his lips out. "Give daddy a kiss sweetheart."

Pouting, Laina kissed her father. "I love you honey. Mom, I'll see you when I get back. Bye Laina."

Laina pouted and waved. It always hurt Shannon when he had to go away for a few days. He hated making his daughter feel sad. Shannon had gotten a plane ticket to Seattle. He had some unfinished business to take care of. He felt like now was the time he better go ahead and do it.

* * *

Shannon rested his head against the window of the city transit bus. It was raining in Seattle. The window was cold as as the raindrops hit the window. He didn't know what to expect when he got to Layne's house. Would Layne even remember him? Suddenly the bus came up to Shannon's stop in the University District. He got off and looked at the street signs. He sighed. He had 8 blocks to walk to get to Layne's condo. He began his journey.

About 40 minutes later, he arrived at Layne's building. He stared up at it. The building was green and white. Shannon sighed and then walked to the entrance.

He walked into the lobby and looked around. He could see his reflection in the floor, it was so shiny. He kept his hands in his jacket as he made his way towards the stairs began to ascend them. He looked at the signs and at his paper with Layne's address on it. 3rd Floor, Unit 5C. He followed the signs and climbed two more flights of stairs and was finally on the 3rd floor. His heart was in his throat as he went past 1C, 2C, 3C, he stopped for a moment at 4C. He slowly walked over to 5C. He stood there staring at the perfectly painted white door. He could hear faint music coming from inside the condo. He sighed and took his burgundy glasses off and put them in his pocket. He ran his hand through his hair. He was about to knock on the door but he hesitated. He decided to to put his glasses back on and ruffled his hair a bit. He sighed one last time and knocked on the door three times. He stood there, tapping his foot. He shook his legs and his arms and rolled his head around to try and shake his nerviness out.

He leaned close to the door and still heard music playing. He knocked again three times, this time louder. He also rang the doorbell one time. He heard the music stop. He leaned closer to the door to see if he could hear any noise on the other side.

A few more minutes of standing there and Shannon knocked again loudly.

He heard a voice.

"Who are you? What do you want?"

Shannon's heart skipped a beat. It was him, in the flesh.

"Layne Staley? Is this Layne Staley's house?" Shannon asked to the door.

"Who wants to know?" The voice sounded.

"It's Shannon Hoon." Shannon began. "Do you remember me?"

Shannon hadn't spoken to Layne in 6 years. There was silence on the other side of the door.

"Layne?" He asked.

"Did someone put you up to this?" The voice asked.

"No. I just came out here because I wanted to see you." Shannon replied, shoving his hands back in his jacket pockets.

There was more silence.

"But why? I thought I told you to get lost."

Shannon's brows lifted. He was a better person now then he was before. If Shannon was still the way he was in the past, he would have said fuck this and left. He knew what he had to do. He would try with every fiber of his being to get Layne to cooperate.

"Layne I just wanted to see you. Let me in."

"Someone put you up to this. Do you have a camera or something? You just want to come over here so you can see what I look like and go spread filth."

He closed his eyes and sighed.

"Layne I promise you I would never do that to you. I just want to see you."

Layne was persistent, like he wanted to push Shannon away.

"But why? After all these years. I hadn't heard from you, you were never around. You fell off the face of the earth. Now you show up at my door step wanting to see me?"

Shannon sighed again. One of Layne's neighbors walked by looking at him oddly.

"Layne What is it with you and the past? I have moved on from that. I didn't come over to talk about what was. I just wanted to see you. I need to talk to you." Shannon tried again.

Shannon stood there for ten minutes. There was nothing on the other side of the door.

"Hello?" He called into the door.

He sighed and looked to the left, and then to the right. He was about to turn and walk off but he suddenly heard door latches being unlocked. He stopped in his tracks and turned around. It was in slow motion as the door slowly opened.

He swear he had stopped breathing for a few minutes when he saw Layne. Sad and tired eyes looked at him. Layne was wearing circular framed glasses. He had a bandanna on his head and he had long stringy dirty blonde hair to his shoulder. He was skin and bones.

"Are you gonna come in?" He asked.

Layne's beautiful voice. It wasn't what Shannon had remembered. It was hoarse, it was wispy.

Shannon stepped inside of his condo and shut the door behind him. He looked around his house and couldn't help but furrow His brow. There were papers strewn everywhere. A guitar sit on the floor, strings broken. Beer bottles lay everywhere. Layne walked back over to the couch. He watched him walk. He was slumping hard. He had all of his windows covered with blankets. There was a pungent smell in his apartment. Shannon saw a cat run by and then he knew what it was, most likely an overflowing litter box.

Layne sat on the couch and unpaused his video game and started playing it again. He was silent. Shannon stepped over trash and cans and made it to the sunken in leather couch. He sat down and looked on Layne's coffee table. Cigarette butts and ashes were everywhere. There were burns all on the table from where he would put his cigarettes out on it. Shannon was taken aback when he saw four or five needles on his table. Heroine.

Shannon looked at him. He looked green. He looked sick. He was absolutely disgusting.

"Layne, how have you been?" he asked.

Layne glanced over at Shannon with a sarcastic look.

"I'm just fine."

Shannon saw his teeth, they were fucked. Shannon felt heartbroken. He used to be such a handsome man.

This was getting awkward. There was no beating around the bush, so Shannon just got straight to the point.

"Layne, the reason I came over here is because I'm concerned about you." he started.

"Yeah uh huh. I've heard that before. You don't care about me, you just want to get me up out of here so I can go sing in a studio. Did Cantrell put you up to this?" Layne spat as he played his video game.

The stinky cat came up to Shannon's leg and started sniffing it.

"Sadie back! Aaaah!" Layne screamed at the poor creature. The cat scurried away.

"No, Layne, he didn't." Shannon replied.

"Well how did you know where I lived?" Layne asked.

"I saw it on TV." Shannon replied.

There was so much pain in Layne's eyes.

"Oh yeah, my bitch of a mother sold a picture of me to the fucking tabloids. Now everyone knows where I live and want to bother me." Layne spat.

Shannon bit his lip. Layne seemed to have major trust issues.

"Layne, I'm not here for any of that, I swear." Shannon said, waving his arm.

"Well then what do you want?" Layne frowned.

Shannon sighed and took a small photo book out of his pocket. Layne had paused his game by now and was looking over at Shannon curiously.

"Layne. I want you to see your daughter." Shannon began.

Layne frowned. "Oh god, not this bullshit again. I already told you years ago to fuck off! I don't got no kid!" Layne spat.

Shannon frowned.

"Layne, she's yours. I think it's a good idea if she can see you, but not here." Shannon said looking around with furrowed brows.

"I ain't no dad. I ain't got no kid!" Layne spat. "I haven't seen you in I don't know how long and you emerge out of nowhere just because you seen me on TV and your only concern is bringing up some bullshit that I thought I had nipped in the bud years ago. Fuck off!" Layne snapped. He continued to play his game.

"You fucking asshole. You were the only person I ever had sex with! You took my virginity! You are the father, you hear me?" Shannon was getting frustrated.

"I don't want to hear this bullshit." Layne spat. "Get the fuck out!"

Shannon flipped through the photo book and found a picture of Laina that he had taken where she looked exactly like Layne. Shannon stood up and knocked the controller out of Layne's hands.

"Hey what the fuck are you doing?" Layne screamed.

Shannon shoved the picture of her in Layne's face. He was getting emotional.

"This is your fucking daughter! Look at her!"

Layne turned his head and frowned. Shannon slapped Layne across the face.

"You fucking look at her god dammit!" Shannon screamed.

Layne was a broken man. His chest started heaving and his eyes filled with tears as he slowly turned his head and looked at the picture. He whimpered as he stared at the little girl's face. She had his curly blonde hair, she had his freckles, she had his blue eyes. He closed his eyes and sobbed as Shannon continued holding the picture in his face. Shannon was pissed.

"Fucking look at this place, you fucking jerk!" Shannon screamed.

He cleared everything off of the table, spilling ashes and half empty beers all over the place. Layne sat back on the couch, his hand by his face, sobbing lightly.

"Look at you, you're so pathetic Layne. You want the truth? I'll give it to you. I wanted to forget the past. I wanted to be a fucking man and I want my daughter to know where she came from, who her parents are. Layne she's 6 years old and she's already in school. She's starting to ask questions. When I saw you on the TV, you looked like dog shit. You look worse than dog shit. So while you continue to fucking kill yourself, why don't you do something good for once in your life and come and see your fucking daughter! You can curse me as much as you want, but she's yours. You make the fucking choice now, you can either come see her before you fucking waist and die in this dump, or you can just die without seeing her and I can tell her how you fucking left me when she was born. How you fucking gave up on her. How you never cared. How I fucking struggled raising her! You fucking think there's no way out of this hell your in, but there is Layne. I was there. When she was born, and after you fucking dumped me, I started going down. It wasn't until I had my fucking overdose in '95 and my mother brought her in my hospital bed that I realized I needed to get my shit together! The fucking least you can do is come see her! Fuck! You fucking asshole!"

Shannon spit on Layne and took the picture out of the photo book and threw it at him. Shannon left and slammed the door shut behind him.

Layne sat there still sobbing. The picture twirled down in his lap. Layne wiped his face and looked down at it.

The back of the photo said "Laina."

"Laina." Layne said to himself.

He burst out crying. Shannon had named her after him. A lot of emotions began to come out of Layne. He looked at the back of the picture. Shannon had wrote his numbers on the back. He turned the picture around and looked at the photo of the little girl. He must have stared at it for hours.

He put the photo on his now cleared off coffee table and stumbled to get up. He shakily got up and almost tripped over trash as he paced back and forth. He went to his closet and started throwing stuff out until he found a box of photo albums. He dug around until he found one that had a heart on it. He ran his dirty calloused fingers over the leather cover. He hadn't looked at this in so long. He brought it back to the couch and sat on down. His cat jumped on the coffee table and sat down and looked at him with curious eyes.

Layne opened the cover and there they were. It was a picture of he and Shannon from 1990. Layne ran his finger over the picture. The memories were starting to come back to him. He had met Shannon at one of Alice In Chain's first shows. Shannon was so innocent back then, hell Layne was too. He smiled at the picture, it was a picture of them before all the bullshit. Before all the drugs. When things were good. Layne flipped through the album, not wanting to get off the subject. He found a picture of himself when he was 6 years old. He grabbed the photo off of the table and set it beside the one of himself. He could feel a pain in his heart.

This little girl could be his twin. He had always knew deep down that she was his, but he didn't want to admit it to himself. He was hanging around the wrong people at that time, people who had filled his head full of lies, stole from him, cheated him. He had pushed Shannon away.

He sat there sobbing as the memories replayed in his brain of days past. He did a lot of thinking.

* * *

Shannon was in his hotel room trying to get some sleep. He had a flight to catch back to Indiana the next day. He couldn't stop thinking of how Layne looked. He looked real bad. Shannon was angry at him, but at the same time, he felt sorry for the poor bastard. He was severely addicted to drugs. Shannon knew how hard it was to get clean. He had to send his daughter to live with his mother while he got clean. The withdrawals were like hell.

Shannon was suddenly thrown out of his thoughts by his cell phone ringing on the end table. Shannon looked over at the time. 2 am. Who the hell was calling him this early in the morning?

Shannon grabbed the phone and pulled the antenna up and pressed the answer button.

"Hello?" He asked.

"...Shannon..."

It was Layne.

"Layne? What the hell do you want? Why are you calling me at this hour?" Shannon frowned.

"I wanna see her." Layne replied.

Shannon's heart jumped in his throat.

"Excuse me?" Shannon asked.

"I said, I want to see her. I want to see Laina."

He actually said her name. Shannon was shocked. He didn't expect this.

"Um. Well, alright. So, do you want to come back with me to Indiana then?" Shannon asked.

"Yeah." Layne replied.

"Well, I'm gonna get another ticket tomorrow then for the plane. My flight is at 10am, so you need to be ready by 9:00. You hear me?"

"Yeah. Yeah. I'll give you the money for the extra ticket." Layne replied.

"Be at my hotel around 9:00. You understand?" Shannon asked.

"Yeah. Yeah. I'll be there." Layne replied.

"Alright. Well, try and get some sleep." Shannon replied, about to hang up.

"Shannon?" Layne asked.

"Hm?" Shannon asked.

"I'm sorry." Layne replied.

Shannon sat on the phone, biting his lip. Layne hung up first. Shannon put the phone down and felt the tears welling up in his eyes. What was Layne sorry for? Sorry for the way he left him, alone and confused with a baby to take care of? Sorry for letting himself get the way he was? Sorry for not being there for his daughter?

Shannon did not get very much sleep that night.


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shannon does some thinking

Shannon let Layne have the window seat on the plane. Layne rested his head against the window, headphones in his ears, hood over his head. Shannon would glance over at him every now and then. Layne was a broken man. The plane ride was silent. Shannon stared straight ahead and his thoughts started to overtake himself. He thought back to when he first found out he was pregnant.

* * *

January 1994

Shannon barely made it to the toilet. He couldn't keep anything down lately. He hacked his guts out in the toilet. Once he was done, he wiped his mouth and sat back against the wall. This was not good. He was on tour with his band, Blind Melon, and he was sick as a dog. He had been to three different doctors in three different towns and they all told him the same thing, that he had a stomach bug. Shannon had this stomach bug for almost 2 months. It would come and go. When he ate something like pickles dipped in peanut butter, it would go away for a little while. He lay on the dirty bathroom floor for while before he hoisted himself off of the floor. He looked up at himself in the mirror. He began to wonder if he had some sort of STD or something. He hadn't told any of the doctors that he was participating in homosexual sex. His eyes grew wide. What if he had AIDS? Or HIV? Shannon looked away from the mirror and shook his head. He didn't even want to think like that.

He left out of the bathroom. Band mate Christopher Thorn was waiting outside.

"Shannon dude, did you get sick AGAIN? Man what the fuck is wrong with you?"

"I don't know. I feel real naucious." Shannon groaned, putting his hair behind his ears.

Shannon found a payphone and reached in his pockets for some quarters. He put the money in and decided to call his on and off again boyfriend. He dialed the number where he knew he could reach him. The phone rang a few times before someone answered.

"Can I speak to Layne?" Shannon asked.

"Hold on." The other person said.

Shannon waited and then he heard his voice.

"Hello?"

"Layne? It's Shannon."

"Hey babe...long time no talk. How you been?"

Shannon sighed. Layne sounded high.

"I've been good. How have you been?"

"Real good. Me and Mike McCready and these guys got some really good jam sessions going on here. We're gonna make a record."

"Oh. That sounds good." Shannon smiled.

"So how's touring?" Layne asked.

"It's going fine. Real fine. I miss you ya know." Shannon replied.

"I miss you too. I can't wait until you have some time off so you can bring your pretty tail up here again." Layne said into the phone.

"Me neither. Say Layne, have you been getting sick lately?" Shannon asked.

"Sick? Like, what do you mean?" Layne asked.

"Well, it's just, I have some sort of stomach bug. I have had it for like 2 months." Shannon replied.

"Oh poor baby." Layne said on the other end.

"Layne, have you been tested for any STDs?" Shannon asked.

Shannon knew Layne was screwing around on him. There was silence on the other end.

"Layne?" Shannon asked.

"Why do you have one?" Layne asked after a few moments of silence.

"No...I don't know, its just, ever since the last time we, ya know, I've been sick with this stomach bug."

"No, I don't have any that I know of Shannon." Layne's voice got dark. "Listen, I've got to go. We're real busy here."

"Oh, ok." Shannon replied.

"I'll talk to you later. If you get tested, let me know the results." Layne replied before hanging up.

Shannon kept the phone to his ear, staring ahead for a few seconds before slowly hanging the phone up. He turned and made his way back to the hotel that he and his guys were staying at.

* * *

Shannon had it bad. He slinked down in his chair as he held his stomach. He had a wet rag on his forehead. It helped slightly. He was so dizzy and sick. Chris sit beside him reading a magazine as they waited in yet another quick care office to see if another doctor could find anything wrong with Shannon. After a few minutes of waiting, Shannon's name was called. Shannon got up and looked at Chris.

"I'll be here man." Chris smiled at him.

Shannon slinked back into the next room with the nurse. She instructed him to stand on the scale and then took his blood pressure and then led him to the examination room. She asked him the usual questions and then left the room. Shannon lay back on the examining table waiting for the doctor to come in. It seemed like forever before there was a knock at the door. Shannon sat up and smiled half-heartedly at the doctor as she walked in.

"Hello Shannon." She said looking at his chart. "I'm Dr. Madden. Oh, you look pale. How are you feeling?" She asked shining a light in his eyes.

"Not so good doc. I throw up at least 3 times a day. Certain foods I can't keep down. I've already seen 3 other doctors, and they keep telling me I have a stomach bug and it will pass, but it's been 3 months."

"Do you smoke or drink?"

"I smoke occasionally and drink." Shannon replied.

"Are you sexually active?"

"Yes." Shannon replied.

The doctor listened to his heart beat and then wrote something on the chart. "Heart sounds are good. Lay back and let me feel on your stomach."

Shannon laid back and lifted his shirt. He flinched when her cold hands touched his stomach. She pressed down on it lightly.

"Sir your abdomen is hard, are you aware of this?" The doctor asked.

"Uh, I guess I get alot of exercise?" Shannon replied.

"No see its hard right around your belly button area. I'm thinking maybe it might be some sort of hernia." Dr. Madden replied.

She put her stethoscope back on and pressed the cold metal peice to Shannon's stomach. She moved it around and then she had a look of suprise on her face. Shannon was scared.

"What is it doc? Is it bad?"

"No. Not necessarily. Let me ask you something Mr. Hoon, are you sexually active with men?" She asked.

"Yeah." Shannon blushed.

The doctor sat down in her chair and slid up to Shannon. Shannon was terrified. Was it cancer?

"Mr. Hoon, I don't know how else to say this so I'm just going to say it. I think you may be pregnant." She looked at Shannon with all seriousness.

Shannon looked back at her and blinked.

"Are you fucking yanking my chain?" Shannon said, irritable.

"Let me guess, you didn't know men could get pregnant?" The doctor replied.

Shannon felt like he was dreaming.

"No. We can't get pregnant. We have cocks! Where would the baby come out?" Shannon frowned.

Dr. Madden sighed. "Shannon I assure you that some men can get pregnant. So no one ever explained this to you. This is how these cases usually work. The person grew up not being educated about it. It's a very taboo subject. In most schools they won't cover it in sex education. So I am not suprised that you didn't know. Shannon I heard a heartbeat when I listened to your stomach. Your stomach is hardened, your getting sick. You have all of the symptoms. A male pregnancy is different from a female pregnancy. If you go through with this, you will have to have a c-section and there's a short time frame near birth where you can do it or the baby could die because it has no where to go."

Shannon's face turned red as the doctor explained this to him. Pregnant? What sorcery was this?

"Here, I'll let you hear it." Dr. Madden said putting the stethoscope around Shannon's head. She moved the silver piece over his stomach.

"Do you hear that tiny thump thump?" She asked.

Shannon bit his lip. He heard it. This was not right. How could this have happened? Why did this happen? His mind was blown and he was freaked out at the same time.

"Shannon we can do a blood test to confirm you are pregnant, but as I said, you are definitely pregnant."

"I'm in the middle of a tour with my band though.." Shannon pouted.

"I understand that. I don't specialize in male pregnancies but I know a very good doctor who does. Alot of people from all over the world go to him. As I said before, male pregnancies are very rare. See you most likely inherited this special gene on the 36th chromosome that gave you the ability to release eggs out of a small ovary, about the size of a little pea, that is located near your prostate. I don't have any pictures I can show you because it's so rare. The gene also changed the composition of the cells in your stomach to enable a fertilized egg to stick to it. When your prostate was struck, and ejaculation occurred, the little swimmers as I like to call them all raced towards that little ovarie to catch that tiny egg." The doctor explained.

"Well if I have an ovary, how come I don't have a period?" Shannon asked.

"Usually the egg just disintegrates inside your stomach. Another perk of having that special gene. This is really a new field of medicine at this point. Studies and tests are still being done to see how male pregnancy really works. That is why I feel it is in your best interest to see this doctor. He is the leading researcher in male pregnancy."

"Will the baby be normal?" Shannon asked.

"Of course. Although I must advise you there are risks associated with male pregnancy. It may or may not be an easy road for you. There have been studies done where males have given birth to their babies and the babies were normal and grew up to live productive lives. I'm gonna prescribe you some prenatal vitamins. And Mr. Hoon, I can't stress this enough, NO drinking, NO smoking. You are carrying a baby."

Shannon frowned. "What if I don't want this thing?"

Dr. Madden looked at Shannon. "If you don't want the baby, you could go to an abortion clinic, but you would have to have an operation. As I said, there is no way for the baby to exit properly, so an induced abortion would not work. Do you want me to set you up an appointment with this male pregnancy doctor?"

Shannon bit his finger nails. He didn't know what to do.

"Yeah, yeah."

"Ok. Well his office is located in California. Just let the nurse know when you can be there and we will set up an appointment for you."

So all the details were hammered out and Shannon left out with brochures and forms and his vitamins. Chris stood up as Shannon neared him.

"Hey man, how'd it go?" He asked.

Shannon looked at him. "Um. Fine."

"You alright man? You look like you just seen a ghost. You sure you gonna be okay?" Chris asked as they walked out of the quick care.

"Yes. Yeah." Shannon said. His mind was gone.

Pregnant. Pregnant. It was all happening too fast for Shannon. He didn't even know men could get pregnant. He inherited a gene? Did his family even know of this supposed gene. Shannon put his hand on his stomach. His stomach was starting to stick out a bit.

His heart almost came out of his throat when he realized who had helped him make this baby.

"Layne." Shannon said out loud.

"What?" Chris asked.

"Oh, nothing." Shannon replied biting his lip.

He thought back to that night of passionate love making, or fucking, as Layne had put it. Layne was all over him. Layne had "fucked" him raw that night. And Layne had released in him. Shannon felt sick and twisted. He had so many emotions running through his head. Fear for what people would think of him, happiness because he was having a baby, but not just any baby, Layne's baby. Maybe it would bring he and Layne closer together, make Layne stop messing around with other people. While he was daydreaming, Chris had grabbed his papers and was reading them. Shannon looked over to see Chris staring at him.

"Shannon. What the fuck is this?" Chris asked. "Male pregnancy? The fuck?"

Shannon snatched his papers back. "It's nothing man!"

"Shannon, that paper said you're pregnant. What the fuck is going on?" Chris demanded.

He seemed just as freaked out as Shannon.

Shannon started crying. "I don't know man. I just found out that guys can get pregnant too. I got some kind of special gene or some shit. I don't know man. I don't know what to do. When we get to California I'm supposed to go see this doctor who specializes in this shit. This is all just happening too fast! Please don't tell anyone!"

Chris bit his lip and rubbed Shannon's back. "Believe me Shannon, I won't because I would want to steer clear of that conversation. This is fucking sci fi shit. Are you gonna go through with it?"

Shannon shrugged. "Maybe. I'm gonna wait to see what this doctor says."

Chris grabbed the information packet back from Shannon again.

"I just need to know more about this. I won't tell anyone Shannon. Your secret's safe with me."

"Thanks Chris." Shannon sniffled.

* * *

Shannon shifted in his seat and sighed. He glanced over at Layne and Layne appeared to be asleep against the plane window. Shannon sat back and closed his eyes.

* * *

Shannon entered the house party that night in Seattle. He looked around, there was smoke and people everywhere. He wrinkled his nose and coughed lightly. Every smell was making him naucious.

People were telling Shannon that he wasn't even looking like himself lately. He had grown a beard, and his eyebrows had gotten very fair ever since he found out he was knocked up. He had let the guys in his band's girlfriends braid his long hair into a zillion brades. The braids had currently been in his head for the past 2 weeks. Shannon started wearing over-sized shirts to hide his baby bump. The beard on his face directed people to it rather than looking at how much weight he was putting on. Shannon was so lucky that he wasn't looking like a house, his stomach just appeared to have a slight bulge. He was currently 6 months along.

Shannon dawned an over-sized, light pink, long-sleeved shirt that someone had made for him, with the words "Blind Melon" stitched into it. He wore cut off shorts, and black doc martins. He made his way through the crowd looking for Layne. He had heard Layne was going to be here, and he hadn't spoken to Layne for some time since he first found out.

Shannon felt it was now or never, time to tell Layne the truth. He couldn't keep this a secret forever. Shannon walked around, scanning every inch of the room, but he didn't see Layne anywhere. Just when he was about to go upstairs, he spotted one of Layne's band mates in the kitchen, Mike Starr.

Shannon made his way through the crowd until he came up behind Mike. Mike was talking a hundred miles a minute to the people around him. Shannon tapped him on the back and Mike turned around and looked at him strange.

"What man?"

"Hey, Mike, it's me, Shannon. Have you seen Layne?" Shannon asked.

Mike squinted his eyes at Shannon.

"Whoa man, nice beard!"

He was high, Shannon could tell.

"Have you seen Layne? Is Layne around?" Shannon asked again.

"Oh, oh yeah man. I think he's upstairs in one of those rooms!" Mike said, pointing at the ceiling.

Shannon smiled and then turned and sighed. He sure hoped Mike was right, he was getting tired of looking. Shannon walked to the stairs, slowly making his way up them. Even the stairs were crammed with people. Shannon had to stop for a moment to catch his breath. He then continued up the stairs and started looking around. He opened multiple doors until he finally opened one and saw a man sitting on a couch. The back of the couch was facing the door. Shannon hung in the doorway staring, the way that hair was slicked back on the back of the person's head, and that hand that was holding a cigarette, dawned with rings on each finger. Shannon knew he had found him.

It was Layne.

"Who is that? Close the fucking door man."

Shannon's heart fluttered. It was Layne. Shannon closed the door and came around to the front of the couch where the lanky lead singer of Alice in Chains sit.

"Layne?" Shannon asked, standing there.

Layne looked up at Shannon, taking a drag from his cigarette. He looked high as all fuck as well.

Layne looked at Shannon for a few minutes before he recognized him.

"Shannon? Shannon what the hell? What's up with that beard? Sit, sit." Layne said patting the couch beside him.

Shannon bit his lip as he sat down beside Layne on the couch.

"I haven't seen you in a while." Shannon replied. "How's it going?"

"It's going good now that you showed up." Layne smirked, putting the cigarette out on the table in front of him and sliding closer to Shannon.

Layne leaned in real quickly and pressed his lips to Shannon's. Shannon nearly melted under Layne's touch. His mouth tasted like cigarettes and beer.

Shannon quickly pulled away from Layne. As much as he wanted to make out with him, he had tracked him down for a reason. He had to tell him.

"Layne, stop it. I have to talk to you..." Shannon started.

Layne pouted. "We haven't seen each other in so long though, and your new look is turning me on." Layne was drunk.

"No, no. Stop it!" Shannon said pulling Layne's hand away from his crotch.

"Layne, remember when I called you because I was getting sick and I thought it might have been an STD?" Shannon started.

Layne got silent, he blinked. He wouldn't even look at Shannon now.

"Yeah." He said, fishing in his pocket for another cigarette. He took it out and put it to his lips, lighting it.

"Well, it's not an STD." Shannon said lowly.

"Fuck Shannon..." Layne began and then looked over.

Shannon had pulled his shirt up before Layne looked over and once Layne saw Shannon's baby bump, he was startled.

"Ah! What the fuck is wrong with you!?" Layne asked, almost dropping his cigarette. He caught it by the burnt end, burning his hand in the process, putting the cigarette out.

Shannon's stomach was round, and his belly button had started growing outward from the umbilical cord.

"Layne, this is what's wrong with me." Shannon replied, rubbing his stomach.

Layne stared at Shannon's stomach and then looked at Shannon.

"Is it cancer?" Layne asked.

Shannon frowned. "No Layne! Do I have to spell it out for you!? It's yours!"

"What do you mean "it's mine"?" Layne asked, brows furrowed.

Shannon sighed.

"It's a baby, and it's yours." Shannon replied lowly, not looking at Layne.

Layne sat there, processing this. Shannon was becoming scared.

"Layne?" Shannon asked.

"That ain't mine." Layne replied.

Shannon's heart jumped.

"Wait, what, so that's all you have to say? So you knew men could get pregnant? Because I didn't." Shannon replied.

Layne was hesitant.

"Someone I was fucking years ago tried this shit on me."

Shannon furrowed his brows.

"Well what did you do?"

"Paid for the operation to kill it." Layne replied bluntly.

"Layne, this baby is yours, and I'm not killing it." Shannon frowned.

Layne was getting irritated.

"It's not mine."

"Layne, yes it is. Your the only person I've ever fucked." Shannon frowned.

Layne was silent still. Shannon was confused as all hell now. He sort of expected Layne to be mad, but not come out blatantly and say that the child wasn't his. Shannon could suddenly feel the anger coursing through his veins. He hauled over and punched Layne in the shoulder.

"Fucking say something Layne!" Shannon screamed at him.

Layne held his shoulder and frowned. He stood up slowly. Shannon glared up at him with daggers. Layne stood there like he was thinking about something, and then all of a sudden he turned around and wrapped his hands around Shannon's neck, squeezing. It had caught Shannon off guard and he sat there, trying to pry Layne's hands off. Layne's rings were digging into Shannon's neck.

Shannon's face turned red and he started choking and trying to gasp for air as Layne spoke, his voice the darkest that Shannon had ever heard.

"You listen here and you listen good. That fucking thing ain't mine, or if it is, I don't want anything to do with it. I never want to see you around here ever again. If you come around me ever again, I'll fucking punch you in the stomach and murder it myself."

Layne let Shannon's neck go. Shannon grabbed his neck and gasped for air. Red marks were now around his neck.

"Fucking coming here, telling me this bullshit, fucking punching me. The fuck's your problem. Your nothing but a filthy WHOOREE!" Layne slurred out the last word.

He walked back over to Shannon who was still trying to catch his breath and knocked him across the face with his fist.

Shannon held his face and started to cry. Layne walked out of the room, slamming the door.

Shannon held himself and rocked back and forth as he cried hysterically in that room, all alone.

* * *

Shannon opened his eyes. The memories were as clear as day. He looked over at Layne who was still asleep. He began to question himself. Why was he doing this? After the way Layne had left things?

For her. He had to do it for her. She needed to know her history.

Shannon shook his head and sighed. He had to purge all evil thoughts out of his mind. He had promised himself he wasn't going to harbor any resentment anymore and he was going to do the right thing.


	3. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Yeah, this is what happens when you eat too much candy. I can't stop, its so good." Layne smiled half heartedly. Shannon swallowed the lump that was in his throat. He knew Layne's words had a double meaning to them.

Shannon and Layne had finally made it to Indiana. Shannon was standing at baggage claim waiting for his bag. Layne spoke up finally.

"Shannon, I gotta go to the bathroom. I'll be back, my bag's a brown leather bag with a peace sign on it."

Shannon nodded and folded his arms. He looked back as Layne began to walk off into the airport. Shannon looked back and almost missed his bag. He grabbed it then waited for Layne's bag to come around.

Layne came back sulking out of nowhere. Shannon handed him his bag and they began to trek to Shannon's car.

"I'm gonna drop you off at home first ok, then I'm gonna go swing by my mom's and get her." Shannon replied as they came up on his car.

He pressed a button on his keys and the doors unlocked. Layne put his bag in the back and sat in the front.

The car ride to Shannon's was awkwardly silent. Of course, what would they have to talk about? When they arrived at Shannon's, he led Layne inside the house and showed him up to the room he would be staying in.

"There's a bathroom through that door, so you should be good. Um, well, we'll see you in a bit." Shannon replied.

"Alright." Layne said lowly, mustering a half smile.

He watched as Shannon walked out of the room. Layne walked over to the bed and sat down on it, looking around the room. Shannon had a nice house. A nice, big house. While Shannon was gone, Layne got up and browsed around. He walked downstairs, looking at all of the records on the wall. He walked into the living room and saw Shannon's family wall. Pictures of he and Laina were scattered around. He smiled a little as he looked at his daughter. His smile suddenly faded. He pulled his sleeve up, looking at all the scars he had. He shook his head and turned away, walking over to the couch and sitting down, grabbing a magazine off of the table and skimming it until Shannon came back

* * *

Little Laina talked Shannon's head off in the car. She told him about everything she and his mother had done while he was gone. Shannon waited patiently and nodded his head and acknowledged he was listening to her. Once she was finished, he spoke.

"Baby, listen to daddy. We have a visitor in our home."

"A visitor! Oooh who is it!?" Laina exclaimed.

"It's someone very special. I need you to be on your very super special best behavior, ok? You promise?" Shannon smiled.

Laina smiled huge and nodded. She clapped her hands together.

"We got a visitor we got a visitor!"

Shannon smirked and shook his head. That was random Laina for you. Shannon grew more nervous as he neared their home. He pulled up in the yard and got out of the car. He helped her get out of her carseat and grabbed her bags. Laina ran in front of Shannon up the steps and to the door.

"Laina honey, wait for daddy!" Shannon called running after her.

Laina ran in the house and screamed. "Oh visitor! We home!" She looked around.

"Laina!" Shannon called as he got in the house, dropping her bag at the door.

Laina didn't listen. She ran in the living room where Layne was sitting, idly looking at the magazine. Layne looked over at the curious child. Laina stared up at the wretched looking depressed man.

Layne dropped the magazine and stared at her. He felt a sadness coursing through his veins. This child, this little human, she had his nose, his blue eyes, his once curly hair. Layne was about to open his mouth and speak but Laina screamed and ran over behind Shannon and started crying.

"Daddy who's that man? He looks like a monster."

Kids were brutally honest. Layne's mouth turned down. He looked down at his lap.

"Layne, this is how children are. She doesn't mean it." Shannon said to Layne across the room.

Layne could hear everything that was said between them. Shannon kneeled down on one knee so he could be face to face with Laina.

"Honey. Remember when you asked me why don't you have a mommy? And daddy explained to you that some little girls have two daddies, or two mommies. Well that man over there, he's not a monster, he's your father honey."

Shannon put her hair behind her ears and kissed her forehead.

"So I have two daddies?" Laina asked, her little eyes twinkling. She held up two fingers.

"Yup that's right." Shannon smiled.

"Did he go on vacation?" Laina asked.

More Laina randomness.

"Uh...yes honey. When you were born, daddy went on vacation. He just got back. He really wants to see you. Don't be shy, why don't you go over there and say hi." Shannon looked straight into her eyes.

Laina was hesitant. She looked over at Layne. She slowly made her way over to the couch and looked at him from a distance. Meanwhile, Layne had started crying. He kept a shaky hand over his face as he cried lightly. Shannon rushed over.

"Layne, Layne, I told you don't take anything she says personally. Kids are gonna be kids. You hear me?"

Shannon felt heartbroken for the man.

Layne nodded and took his glasses off, wiping his eyes before putting them back on.

"Why are you crying mister!?" Laina asked, curious again.

"I got a big boo boo." Layne finally spoke to her.

Laina furrowed her brows and tilted her head at Layne.

"I can get you some bandaids. See I have one too. Gramma put this bandaid on me!"

She lifted her little arm to show Layne her bandaid.

"No, I don't need a band aid." Layne sniffled scratching his eye.

Shannon sat on the chair adjacent to the couch and watched the scene unfolding.

"Why are your teeth all yucky?" Laina said crawling on the couch and sitting beside Layne.

"Because I didn't take care of them." Layne replied.

"My daddy says I'm supposed to brush my teeth three times a day! I take care of mines!" She smiled at Layne, showing all of her teeth.

"I see, I see." Layne smiled a little.

"You must eat a lot of candy! My daddy says that candy and processed foods are bad for you." Laina replied.

"Yeah, this is what happens when you eat too much candy. I can't stop, its so good." Layne smiled half heartedly.

Shannon swallowed the lump that was in his throat. He knew Layne's words had a double meaning to them.

"How old are you?" Layne asked.

"I'm six!" Laina said holding up six fingers.

"Wow. Your a big girl. What do you like to do for fun?" Layne continued conversing with the girl.

"I like to draw...and um...I like to sing....and I like to play guitar!" Laina smiled, sliding even closer to Layne.

Layne tensed up. He had never really been around children before.

"You wanna see my room!?" Laina exclaimed, her little chin resting on Layne's arm.

"Sure." Layne smiled.

Laina jumped up and ran to the stairs. Layne got up and looked at Shannon and then followed little Laina up the stairs. Shannon waited for a little while before he followed behind them. By the time they turned to walk into her room, Shannon was coming up the stairs. Shannon stood in the hallway by her door. He peeked in and smiled to himself.

Layne was sitting in one of her fisher price chairs, at her little table. His long legs were pressed against his chest. He looked very uncomfortable.

Laina started showing Layne pictures she had drawn. Layne smiled as he looked at them. He looked around her room. It was nice and clean, walls painted purple. Shannon had done a good job. Her room was so nice.

"Laina, I have something for you." Layne replied softly.

Shannon peeked around the door frame. He hadn't expected this.

Layne reached in his coat pocket and took out a small TY beanie baby bear. It was purple. Seems he had chosen the right color.

Laina squealed and snatched it from him.

"It's not much. I got it just for you." Layne smiled.

Laina hugged the little bean bag bear. "Is it a girl or a boy!!!" Laina exclaimed.

"It's a boy." Layne smiled.

"I'm gonna name him...Violet!" Laina exclaimed.

"Violet it is. He cares about you very much you know. You need to always keep him with you. He says he will watch over you." Layne smiled.

She was so cute hugging the bear. Suddenly he was caught off guard as Laina ran around to him and wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him.

"Thank you daddy!"

Layne hesitated and put an arm around her little waist and pulled her closer to him.

This was something he hadn't felt before. A connection with a child, a sweet and innocent child who knew nothing of his past, who didn't judge him, who wasn't trying to see what she could get out of him. She hadn't been poisoned by the world yet. She saw the good in him.

The next thing he knew Shannon was standing in there.

"Say cheese!" Shannon sniffled.

Layne blinked as the camera flashed.

"What are you doing?" Layne asked Shannon.

"Taking pictures..." Shannon smiled halfheartedly.

Layne smiled halfheartedly and Laina smiled huge as Shannon snapped another photo of them.

"Laina, it's almost time for your cartoons." Shannon smiled.

Laina suddenly jumped up and squealed. "Daddy I'm going to go watch cartoons, are you coming!?" She smiled looking back at Layne.

"Yeah, I'll be there in a few minutes." Layne smiled.

Laina ran out of the room and it was just he and Shannon now. Layne stood up and walked over to Shannon.

"She's a trip, isn't she?" Shannon smiled.

Layne burst out crying and leaned into Shannon. Shannon flinched and slowly wrapped his arms around Layne.

Layne felt guilty as all hell. He had really missed out so far. He had done so many fucked up things. He looked at Shannon.

"Why are you being so nice to me? Why are you letting me see her?" Layne sobbed.

Shannon's mouth was turned down.

"You honestly want to know Layne? I wanted her to see you before you die Layne. Layne if you keep doing this to yourself, you'll be dead before you know it. I can't let my little girl grow up without knowing both of her parents. I want her to know that you cared about her. I don't want her growing up thinking you didn't give a shit about her."

Layne stepped away from Shannon and looked down as tears fell from his eyes.

"You talk about me like I'm gonna die tomorrow."

"It's only a matter of time Layne if you keep doing this to yourself." Shannon said truthfully.

The two men stood there when suddenly Laina ran back in, oblivous to the tension in the room. She ran right over to Layne and grabbed his calloused hand.

"Daddy! C'mon! Cartoons!" She exclaimed.

Layne held her little hand. It felt so fragile in his own. He followed her downstairs and to the living room tv. He sat on the couch and she sat beside him, putting her fingers in her mouth and staring at her cartoon. Layne had his arm around her.

He stared down at her and smiled. She had "Violet" clutched in her other arm. She rested her head against Layne's chest as she stared at the tv. Layne wasn't paying attention to the cartoon. He stared down at his daughter. He still couldn't believe how much of a spitting image of himself she was. He was still tense as he sat there and idly watched the television with his daughter.

Shannon walked back and forth around the house, taking care of chores and let Layne enjoy some alone time with his daughter.

After an hour of cartoons, Layne noticed that Laina had fell asleep against him. He smiled to himself, reaching over and shakily putting her hair behind her ear.

"She sleep?" Shannon asked coming up behind the couch.

Layne looked up at Shannon and smiled.

"Yeah."

"I'm gonna whip up something for dinner." Shannon replied, patting Layne on the shoulder.

He handed Layne the remote so he could change the channel. Layne flipped through the channels and thought about Laina. She was so precious. He had really missed out. He hated himself for what he had done to Shannon. He realized he should have been here. He should have quit drugs a long time ago.

He wanted to be in her life now. He felt like shit right about then, but he felt...happy. Happy with his daughter napping against him.

A few minutes later, Shannon called Layne's name.

"Hmm?" Layne asked looking back.

"Layne wake her up and take her to the bathroom and make sure she washes her hands.'

Layne bit his lip. His first parental duty. He reached over and shook the drooling little girl's shoulder.

"Laina...psst! Laina wake up." Layne whispered.

Laina furrowed her brows and snorted lightly, wiping her mouth and then her expression changed to normal again. She was still sleeping.

"Laina wake up, your dad says we gotta wash our hands. It's almost dinner time." Layne said softly, shaking her again.

"Leave me alone...." Laina wined, nuzzling her face into Layne's chest.

Layne smiled to himself. His heart felt warm and fuzzy. He ran his hand through her hair.

"Layne, don't be shy. Sometimes she gets fussy." Shannon said walking into the room.

"Little girl. Get your butt up and go wash your hands!" Shannon said loudly, leaning over the couch.

"No!" Laina wined, clutching Layne's shirt.

"Laina, now!" Shannon raised his voice.

Laina sat up and rubbed her eyes and started wining. "I'm not hungry, I don't wanna wash my hands, I don't wanna eat!"

"If Violet sits with us, will you wash your hands and eat?" Layne randomly tried, holding up the little bear.

Laina looked at Layne with bright eyes. She smiled shyly, stretching her arms and nodded.

"Let's go." Layne smiled, feeling proud of himself that he had executed his first parental command ever.

Shannon was surprised.

"Hmm. Good job." He smiled patting Layne on the back

Layne followed behind Laina as she skipped down to the downstairs bathroom. There was a step stool at the sink so she could reach it.

"Do you need some help?" Layne asked sitting the bear on the counter.

"No. I'm a big girl. I can reach it all by myself!" She chirped, stretching over to get the soap and turning on the faucet.

Layne chuckled to himself as he watched her wash her hands.

"I don't know what to do, can you show me?" Layne asked softly.

"Hands!" She commanded.

Layne leaned down and stuck his hands under the water. Laina stretched to reach the soap again. She pulled Layne's hand over to it and pumped the bottle to put some soap on his hands.

"Go like this!" Laina said rubbing her hands together.

"Daddy says you have to get between all your fingers and your fingernails!" She said proudly.

"Like this?" Layne smiled washing his hands like she told him to.

Laina nodded and smiled up at Layne. They finished up and dried their hands off. Layne followed behind Laina. His heart jumped when she took his hand.

"Daddy we washed our hands!" Laina exclaimed.

 

"Come to the dining room honey!" Shannon called.

Laina led Layne to the dining room. Shannon only used the dining room when guests were over, otherwise he and Laina would sit on the couch and eat off of the coffee table, watching tv.

Shannon had already sat everything out. Shannon picked Laina up and twirled her around, kissing her nose before he sat her in her chair. Laina took her fork and began eating.

Layne smiled and sat down on the opposite side facing her and Shannon sat down at the head of the table. He started eating his food as well. Layne stared down at the plate and slowly took his fork, picking through it.

"What is this Shannon?" Layne asked.

"Its called Mi Goreng. It's a vegan dish." Shannon said, sipping his water.

"Well what's in it? It looks like dog throw up." Layne frowned.

Laina giggled from across the table.

"Watch your language Layne. It's bits of tofu, italian style green beans, and buckwheat soba noodles."

"Geez. I remember when you used to live off of easy cheese and beer." Layne smiled softly.

Shannon smiled and shook his head. "Laina tell daddy what I told you about trying new things."

"Daddy says don't be afraid to try new food. He says you should be brave!" Laina chirped.

Layne scrunched his nose up and rolled some of the noodles on his fork. He slowly tasted it, chewing it slowly and swallowing it.

"Wow, that's an acquired taste." Layne winced.

"You've just been eating processed food for so long that you're not used to this stuff. The more you eat it, the more this will taste good and the garbage will taste bad to you." Shannon smiled.

Layne slowly ate his food. He watched Laina and smiled as she ate her food, holding her fork in an odd fashion. She was so cute. She was his. It still blew his mind.

* * *

Later that night, when it was time for Laina's bedtime, she started getting fussy again. Layne walked up to Laina's door as Shannon was helping her put her pajamas on.

"I don't wanna go to bed yet." Laina wined.

"Laina, it's your bedtime honey. You have to go. Here." Shannon replied, handing her the purple bear.

Laina cried as she crawled into her bed. Shannon had pulled the comforter back and then pulled it over her as she laid down.

"Shush now honey. What do you want tonight, a bedtime story? A song?" Shannon said softly, rubbing her forehead.

Layne smiled to himself as he stood in the doorway watching them.

"A song." Laina sniffled.

"Which one?" Shannon smiled.

"I want daddy to sing one." Laina replied, pointing over at Layne.

Shannon looked back at Layne.

"Laina I think daddy's pretty tired. He's had a long day."

Laina started to wine again.

"No Shannon, it's okay. I can sing to her..." Layne said softly, walking into the room and getting on his knees in front of her bed.

"What kinds of songs does she like?" Layne whispered.

"Sing anything you want." Shannon smiled, backing away.

Layne stared down at the comforter as he thought. He scratched his head.

"Uh, let's see...um....okay. Here we go."

Layne cleared his throat and looked into Laina's eyes as he started singing a song he had found himself listening to a lot lately.

__  
There was a man  
A lonely man  
Who lost his love  
Through his indifference 

_A heart that cared_  
That went unshared  
Until it died  
Within his silence 

_And solitare's the only game in town_  
And every road that takes him  
Takes him down  
And by himself it's easy to pretend  
He'll never love again 

_And keeping to himself he plays the game_  
Without her love  
It always ends the same  
While life goes on around him everywhere  
He's playing solitaire 

_A little hope_  
Goes up in smoke  
Just how it goes  
Goes without saying 

_There was a man_  
A lonely man  
Who would command  
The hand he's playing 

_And solitare's the only game in town_  
And every road that takes him  
Takes him down  
And by himself it's easy to pretend  
He'll never love again 

_And keeping to himself he plays the game_  
Without her love  
It always ends the same  
While life goes on around him everywhere  
He's playing solitaire 

_And solitare's the only game in town_

_And every road that takes him_  
Takes him down  
While life goes on around him everywhere  
He's playing solitaire  


Laina's eyes grew heavy during the song. Layne started running his fingers through her hair as he sung it softly.

Shannon put his hand to his mouth as he watched Layne connect with her. She had already gotten so comfortable around him. She fell asleep during the song. Shannon left the room as he felt the tears coming on. He walked down to his room and closed the door, sobbing lightly as he put his hands over his face.

Fucking Layne. Why did he have to choose to sing that song? It was heartbreaking to Shannon.

Meanwhile, Layne softly sang the last line, kissing her forehead. Laina was fast asleep. Layne slowly got up and looked around the room. Shannon was gone. Layne's smile faded. He headed to the guest bedroom.

* * *

Layne laid in the bed of the guest bedroom, staring at the ceiling. Shannon's house sure did get quiet at night. He couldn't sleep. He thought about Laina. He smiled to himself. She was such a trip. Layne wanted more then anything to be in her life. He had only been here in Indiana for a few hours and he already loved it. It was so much better than Seattle. There were no drug dealers here, there were no goons. He wanted to stay here forever. He wanted to be a father to Laina. He didn't want to be like his own father.

The room suddenly started getting really hot to Layne. He furrowed his brows and threw the comforter off of him, turning on his side and trying to get some sleep.

He tossed and turned. He felt like he was in a cold sweat. Layne sat up and ran his hands through his hair. He was quickly starting to realize what was going on with himself. He stood up shakily. His nose started running and his eyes started filling with tears as he started to make his way to the bathroom. He started trembling and fell to his knees on the floor. He started crawling until he got in the bathroom.

He lay against the cool tiles, sideways, shaking uncontrollably, his eyes rolling in the back of his head every now and then. He whimpered loudly, his voice shaking as he shook violently.

Fucking withdrawal. He hadn't brought any drugs with him. It was only a matter of time before this happened.

He started sobbing on the bathroom floor as he lay there, saliva sliding out of his mouth. He had a headache and his stomach felt like it was being peirced with a knife. He felt really hot and sweaty.

Suddenly he started gagging. Tears poured down his face as he lay there on the cold, hard bathroom floor, alone but not lonely.

Puke suddenly shot from his mouth. It was only a matter of time.

"...Daddy?" Layne heard a soft voice.

He groaned as he looked down, seeing innocent Laina standing in the doorway. His heart broke. He couldn't control himself. He wished he could. He never wanted her to see him this way.

Layne closed his eyes as he threw up again.

Laina screamed and ran out of the room.

"Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" Laina screamed from the top of her lungs, barging into Shannon's bedroom.

Shannon sat up quickly in bed, rubbing his eye.

"Baby girl, what the heck are you doing all that yelling for?" Shannon was half asleep, his hair disheveled, his eyes still closed.

"Daddy Layne's dying! He's dying daddy! I don't want him to die! I love him!" Laina screamed.

"Dying? Baby did you have a bad dream? Calm down baby." Shannon replied.

"Daaadddy!" Laina wailed.

Shannon sighed and got up and picked the screaming child up. He walked down to the guest bedroom and looked inside. Layne wasn't in his bed. Shannon felt his heart sink as he set the screaming child down and ran in the room and looked into the bathroom.

He saw Layne's feet shaking. He immdieately knew what was going on.

"Laina, I want you to go to your room, NOW!" Shannon yelled at the little girl.

Laina stood there crying, clutching her bear that Layne had given her.

"GO NOW!" Shannon screamed.

Laina ran down the hall and to her room, jumping in her bed and putting the covers over her head. She was scared.

Meanwhile, Shannon ran in the bathroom.

"Layne...Layne oh my fucking god! Your withdrawing hard!" Shannon exclaimed.

"No...f-f-fucking s-s-shit!" Layne said shakily.

He started crying.

"I fucking s-s-shit myself S-Sh-Shannon!" Layne exclaimed.

"Oh boy..." Shannon mumbled, seeing the mess behind Layne.

"I didn't w-w-want her to s-s-s-see me like this." Layne cried looking up at Shannon.

"Layne, your on this stuff pretty bad..." Shannon said, a lump forming in his throat.

"P-please t-t-take me to the h-h-hopsital. P-please!" Layne stuttered, trembling loudly.

Shannon looked around. He quickly got up and left Layne there. He was shaking himself as he grabbed the nearest phone and first called 911, and then called his mother to take Laina in.

* * *

Shannon sat by Layne's bedside at the hospital. Layne had been unconcious for a few days. Eventually his withdrawals had gotten so bad he just passed out. Shannon's heart was breaking. The man hadn't even been here one day and he was already in a hosptial for something drug related already. Shannon's thoughts were interrupted when he heard a cough.

He quickly looked down to see Layne stirring. Layne's arms were bandaged up. He had alot of open sores and abcesses on them from the needles he used. He was very skinny and frail and pale.

Layne opened his eyes and turned his head, looking at Shannon. He felt like complete shit. Shannon stared down at Layne and smiled half heartedly.

"Where's Laina?" Layne said softly.

Shannon smiled a little. That was cute that his first thought was about his daughter.

"She's at my mom's house Layne. How are you feeling? Not so good?" Shannon replied.

"This is fucking hell." Layne said weakly, looking up at Shannon.

Shannon was silent. He didn't really know what to say to the man.

"Shannon I'm really sorry. For everything." Layne replied.

He looked down at his arms and had just noticed they were bandaged up. He closed his eyes tight, his nose scrunching up as the tears poured down his face.

"I really loved you back then you know. I fucking loved you but my head wasn't in the right place. I've really fucked my life up. I should have been with you. I'm so fucking sorry for everything." Layne sobbed.

Shannon sighed.

"Layne, everything happens for a reason. I forgive you, I'm not harboring anymore resentment towards you."

"That little girl, she's so precious." Layne smiled and sobbed. "Shannon I love her. You've done such a wonderful job raising her. You're like a super dad."

Shannon smiled and looked down at his hands

"Shannon I don't wanna die. I don't wanna die like this." Layne said desperately, tears pouring down his face.

"I wanna see Laina go to her prom. I wanna see her get married. I want grandchildren."

Shannon was still silent, staring at his hands, playing with his watch.

"I don't want to go back to Seattle. I can't. Please Shannon. Please help me. Please help me get clean. Shannon I don't wanna die. I have to live...for her. Please."

Layne sobbed so hard spit was falling down his lip. He was so fragile.

Shannon finally looked at Layne. His heart was breaking.

 

"I want you to get help. Layne I just don't know if you're gonna be dedicated to getting clean. You've been using for so long. It's gonna be a hard road ahead of you to beat this thing." Shannon said sadly.

Layne looked at Shannon and sobbed.

"Shannon I want to beat it. I have to. I want to be in my daughter's life. Please oh god please help me!" Layne begged and pleaded.

"You can't live with me while you're getting clean." Shannon said sadly.

"I'll do anything to get off of this shit. Please tell me what I need to do!" Layne begged.

"You can go to the clinic where I went to get clean. You live there until you've rid your body of all toxins. They teach you everything, clean eating, clean living. You'll be a new person once you get out of it." Shannon smiled.

He couldn't believe how fast things were going.

"I wanna be a new person. I don't wanna live like this anymore. I'm not going back to Seattle!" Layne exclaimed.

"You don't have to, you can stay with us." Shannon smiled, rubbing Layne's forehead.

"You were the only honest person in my life, I was too blind to see. I really messed us up." Layne cried, looking straight into Shannon's eyes.

Shannon just stared down at him blankly. There was nothing he could say, Layne was right.

"Where's Laina, I wanna see her. Can you bring her in here?" Layne asked softly.

"Layne...I don't know if I want her around this type of thing. She picks up on things easily now..." Shannon said hesitantly.

"Please Shannon, please let me see her. I need to see her." Layne begged, tears pouring down his face.

Shannon bit his lip.

"Fine. I'll call my mom." He said.

Shannon stepped outside of the room and made the call for his mother to bring Laina out there to see Layne.

"Thank you." Layne said when Shannon sat back down.

Shannon put his hand on Layne's and smiled. In the back of his head, he couldn't help but have that evil thought that doubted Layne. He didn't think Layne was going to be able to beat this.

* * *

Layne lay there looking out of the window, when suddenly the door to his room opened and Laina ran in screaming.

"Laina! Inside voice!" Shannon exclaimed at the little girl.

Laina had a bag in her hands. She had her curly hair pulled back into a ponytail and she had on a pink dress with white leggings on underneath and matching pink shoes. Shannon picked her up and kissed her and sat her on Layne's bed. Shannon then walked out to speak with his mother in the hall way.

Layne and Laina were alone.

"Daddy are you sick?" Laina pouted.

"Yeah baby. I'm sick." Layne smiled tugging on her ponytail lightly.

Laina's eyes filled with tears as she stared at Layne. It broke Layne's heart.

"Why are you sick? Are you gonna die?" She asked.

Layne furrowed his brow. How the hell did a 6 year old know about the concept of dying? What were they teaching her in school?

"No baby, daddy's not gonna die. I'm gonna get better, you'll see." Layne smiled.

He had a lump in his throat.

"I drawed you a picture." Laina smiled.

"Oh yeah?" Layne smiled.

Laina pulled a peice of paper out of her bag. She held it up to Layne.

"Let's see what you got here." Layne replied taking the paper and holding it in front of him.

His heart melted when he looked at it. They were stick figures, but they were he, her and Shannon.

She had even written "I love you" on it and signed her name. Layne couldn't help but get choked up. He started crying.

He had only met this girl a day ago, and she obviously already thought highly of him. She was so innocent. She had so much love to give. She was perfect. When he was around her, it made him forget about everything else. He loved that feeling. He never wanted it to go away. It was better than drugs. He would do anything to be with her. He would kick drugs.

"Daddy don't cry. I can make your boo boos better!" Laina exclaimed.

Layne set his picture on his bedside table. He would cherish it.

Laina leaned up and kissed Layne's forehead, and both cheeks.

"I think I'm starting to feel a little better already." Layne smiled, sniffling.

Laina sat on her knees and wrapped her little arms around Layne's neck and hugged him, pressing her face against his.

"Daddy I'm so glad you came back from vacation! I missed you!"

Layne chuckled. This must have been the randomness that Shannon was referring too.

"I love you." Layne smiled.

"I love you too daddy!" Laina smiled.

She reached in her bag and pulled out Violet. Layne was surprised that she had took such a liking to the thing.

"Violet's here! He wants a kiss!" Laina smiled.

Layne smiled as she held up the bear to his face. He planted one on the bear.

"My turn!" Laina exclaimed, puckering her lips.

"No baby...no daddy doesn't want you to kiss him right now." Layne replied self conciously.

Laina pouted. "But why daddy!? Daddy Shannon kisses me all the time!" She said innocently.

"Well I need to see a dentist before we can kiss honey." Layne smiled half heartedly.

Laina didn't understand.

"But when will that be? When can I kiss you?" She asked.

"Soon Laina. In the near future." Layne smiled.

"Tell me about your day." Layne smiled, changing the subject.

Layne loved hearing her talk. She was a little firecracker. She tried to be so adult yet she was so innocent. She was really something.

Shannon walked back into the room while Laina was talking to Layne. He sat back down in his chair at Layne's bedside and smiled warmly as he watched the two.

Eventually Laina got tired and snuggled up beside Layne and fell asleep. Layne didn't mind. He enjoyed the closeness.

Shannon put his hand on Layne's hand.

"Layne we're gonna get you some help. I'll take care of everything. I'll take care of you. We're gonna beat this. I care about you deeply Layne, I wanna see you happy. Laina loves you. I want you to be around for Laina as well." Shannon smiled, holding Layne's hand.

"Thank you so much Shannon. This means the world to me. Just when I thought no one gave a fuck about me anymore...You show up at my door. You're my savoir." Layne smiled kissing the top of Laina's hair.

"I sure hope so." Shannon sighed clutching Layne's hand.

"Shannon can I ask you something?" Layne asked softly.

"Hmm?" Shannon asked, running his hands through his hair.

"Why did you name her Laina?" Layne asked.

He already figured why, but he just wanted to hear Shannon say it.

"Well duh Layne, I named her after you." Shannon chuckled.

"She could be your fraternal twin."

Layne looked down at he and Shannon's hands and smiled.


	4. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I guess this is it." Layne said, looking down. "Yeah. This is it. I won't see you in 6 months." Shannon said, voice cracking.

Layne was still in the hospital. Arrangements had been made at the Serenity Life Rehab clinic, located in the capital of Indiana, Indianapolis. That was the place where Shannon had went years ago to kick his very own dirty drug habit. The folks over there were very good and it was a very nice place. There was no telling how much it had changed over the years. Shannon was gonna drive Layne there himself. Layne would have no contact with the outside world for the next 6 months after Shannon dropped him off. Shannon was anxious when he thought about it. Those first 6 months were the hardest. If Layne could get through that, Shannon knew he would be okay.

Shannon had came home from the hospital for a few days. He left his daughter with his mother. Shannon needed alone time to think. He sat on his back patio, sipping on a beer, shirtless with shorts on. He idly traced patterns on the patio table. The sound of the trees blowing in the wind and the birds chirping were soothing to him.

He would have to get back to work soon. The past week and a half had happened so fast. He never thought Layne would be back in his life. He was relieved that he had taken the first step. He really hoped Layne would survive this. Even though he had harbored a lot of hatred towards Layne for dumping him for years, he still had a small place inside of his heart for the man.

Shannon sipped his beer and stared into space, running his fingers through his hair.

* * *

1994

Shannon felt fat. Extremely fat. He was already 8 months and his stomach stuck out like he had a beer belly. He had moved in with Chris. The two were living in California so Shannon could see his Doctor.

Things had been going very smoothly with his pregnancy. Shannon had stopped smoking and drinking, but he was eating all the time.

The relationship between Chris and Shannon was purely platonic. Chris was the only one who knew that Shannon was pregnant in their circle of friends. Shannon's own mother didn't even know. Chris was taking care of Shannon during his drastic time of need, and for that, Shannon was extremely grateful.

Shannon was heartbroken over Layne. He chose to deal with it by simply not thinking about it. Sometimes he would see triggers that would make him go into a rant and cry hysterically. Sometimes Chris would have to talk him down out of it. The hormones were driving Chris crazy.

Shannon had chopped all of his hair off. He was too lazy to deal with his long hair. He now sported a short choppy hairdo. It curled up on his head and most of the time he would wear a hat anyway. He felt as big as a house and his ankles were swollen alot.

Shannon currently lay on the couch, in his underwear, 5 o'clock shadow on his face, his stomach as round as a hill. Shannon kept his hand on it as he watched tv. Chris walked in after a while with a bowl of chips and a bottle of water for Shannon, and a beer for himself.

"I want a beer..." Shannon wined as he took the bottled water and started sipping it.

"Yeah well I promise after you have her I will watch her for a whole day so you can get shitfaced drunk." Chris smiled, grabbing the remote and switching it to afternoon divorce court.

Shannon sat up now, wincing a little bit. His lower back was hurting all the time. He felt out of it from laying around all day. He reached over in the bowl and grabbed a handful of chips and watched the tv as he stuffed them in his mouth and crunched loudly.

The two sat there in silence, listening to a woman complain about baby mama problems to the judge on the television. Chris chuckled a little.

Shannon scarfed down the handful of chips and was sitting there all of a sudden when he felt his baby start to move around in his belly. Shannon furrowed his brow and put both hands on his stomach. It always felt weird, and it was starting to hurt more and more each day as she kicked and prodded around inside of him.

He let out a sharp gasp and Chris looked over at him.

"She moving again?" Chris asked, mouth full of chips.

"Yeah dude." Shannon frowned.

"Move your hands, let me feel!" Chris replied.

Shannon moved his hands so Chris could put his hand on his stomach.

"Whoaaa...that is too fucking freaky man! She's a little rocker in there!" He smiled as he took his hand away.

"Shit man!" Chris exclaimed as they both saw a bump appear on Shannon's stomach and move across it about 6 inches before going down.

Shannon winced and arched his back. "That fucking hurt. She's real rough in there." Shannon wined.

"Eh, you only got one more month and then she'll be free to kick around and do what she likes outside!" Chris smirked.

Shannon smiled a little and put his hands back on his stomach. His stomach was hurting a bit the whole day so far. He wasn't sure if that was normal but it wasn't really severe so he just dealt with it. His baby still moved around alot. Shannon bit his lip hard and suffered in silence.

Later that night

Shannon's stomach started hurting very bad. She wouldn't stop moving. Shannon laid in his bed and rubbed circles around his stomach, breathing in and out deep.

"C'mon baby, stop kicking me so hard. Go to sleep so daddy can get some sleep. Please..." Shannon wined rubbing his stomach.

He laid there staring up at the ceiling and closed his eyes. His stomach felt like it was going to explode.

Shannon sat up slightly. He suddenly felt a sharp pain on his inside that made him nearly jump out of his skin. It felt so weird and it hurt so bad that it scared him. Chris had went to Brad's house to hang out that night.

Shannon's baby was moving around alot in his belly now. Shannon shakily reached over and picked up the phone and dialed Brad's number.

"Please pick up, please pick up!" Shannon whispered as he listened to the dial tone.

After a few rings, he was relieved when Brad picked up the phone.

"Yellow?" He said in his accent.

"Brad? It's Shannon, is Chris there? I need to speak to him, it's urgent!" Shannon exclaimed.

"Yeah yeah, he's right here...hold on man." Brad replied.

Shannon could hear him in the background.

"It's Shannon man, he sounds upset."

"Shannon? What's going on?" Chris asked into the phone.

Shannon had started crying by now. "Chris you need to come home, my stomach hurts so bad, she's moving like crazy. I felt this sharp pain in my stomach. What if she ruptured something? You need to come home and take me to the emergency room!" Shannon exclaimed.

"Shit, I'll be there in a few minutes Shannon! Get your shit together and wait by the door!" Chris exclaimed and then hung up the phone.

Shannon stood up on shaky legs and put some clothes on. He had to wear flip flops because he couldn't bend down to tie shoes anymore. He got his wallet and his keys and slowly walked over to the living room couch.

Shannon sat there rocking back and forth, rubbing his stomach and taking deep breaths, trying to make himself feel better. Chris had arrived within a few minutes, barging in and looking over and rushing over to Shannon.

He helped him up and held onto him as they walked outside and to Chris's car.

Chris got in and started driving to the ER.

"You don't think this is it do you?" Chris asked.

"I'm not sure. It might be, she's moving around a lot..my stomach's killng me..." Shannon wined.

Shannon started talking crazy on the way to the ER.

"Chris what if the umbilical cord's wrapped around her neck and she's struggling inside of me? What if she's dying? Oh god I don't want my baby to die. I want my baby!" Shannon exclaimed.

Shannon was irking Chris's nerves.

"Shannon! Shut the fuck up! Don't fucking talk like that! You've made it this far with no problem! Calm down, breath man, just breath! Your freaking! You don't need to freak right now!"

Shannon and Chris started breathing in and out together. It did calm Shannon down a bit.

Chris finally pulled into the parking lot of the ER. He quickly parked and got out and quickly helped Shannon out. Shannon had put on a white tanktop. His bulgy stomach was sticking out. They entered the ER.

Everything was like a blur to Shannon. One minute he was telling the receptionist what was going on and the next minute he was in a wheelchair, being wheeled through white halls, into a white room with a cold and hard bed, being told to take his clothes off and wear a hospital gown.

The next thing he knew he was being hooked up to machines, nurses were feeling on his stomach, talking amongst one another.

Shannon didn't feel safe until he saw his normal doctor, Dr. Carter walk in.

"Shannon, I hear you aren't doing so well. How are you feeling?" He asked Shannon.

"My stomach hurts real bad, baby keeps moving doc..." Shannon pouted.

Dr. Carter felt around on Shannon's stomach as the nurses stood around. He conversed with the nurse's and then he looked at Shannon.

"Okay Mr. Hoon, I think it's best that we go ahead and get her out of your stomach. Your vitals are all normal, no elevated pressure. You said you felt a sharp pain in your stomach, that may have just been her kicking your ribs...but to be on the safe side, we're gonna go ahead and give you a c section. Now the nurse here's gonna prep you for the procedure. I will be right back okay, this will be over before you know it. I have no doubt that she's okay, she's just ready to come out."

His words were encouraging to Shannon. Shannon could feel his heart rate pick up as the nurse instructed him to sit up at the edge of the bed.

He leaned over, his gown being pulled up as the nurse gave him an epidural in his spine. He winced as he felt the burning sensation of the needle sliding in between the discs of his spine. He was instructed to lay back as quickly as possible.

The effect was immediate, Shannon couldn't feel his legs or his feet. He didn't even notice when they inserted a catheter into his urethra.

Shannon was going through this alone. Hospitals really freaked Chris out. Chris was waiting in the waiting room until something happened.

Shannon put his arm over his forehead as the curtain was positioned over his upper stomach so he couldn't see what was going on.

Shannon started sobbing. Dr. Carter was explaining the procedure to Shannon as he was performing it. Shannon wasn't even listening. His mind was playing a fantasy in his head.

He could see Layne in there with him, his blonde curls slicked back, his bright blue eyes shining as the doctors held up their baby. He wished Layne was here. He wished Layne cared. He was still in fucking love with Layne even though Layne hated him.

Why couldn't they just be a happy, perfect family? Shannon could see Layne holding the baby, he and Shannon hunched together, kissing. It would be perfect.

Shannon's thoughts were interrupted when he heard a raspy high pitched cry.

"It's your little girl!" One of then nurses cooed.

Shannon smiled, lifting his arm down. He couldn't see her yet. He waited patiently and finally he felt his gown being pulled down, and the curtain was removed. One of the nurse's put the blankets over Shannon. Dr. Carter turned around after cleaning his baby off.

It was like slow motion as he brought her over to Shannon. She was wrapped in a pink blanket. She was still red and a bit pruny from being inside of Shannon's stomach.

"Here she is Shannon. The surgery was a success! She just wanted out. She's one month early, but she seems to be very healthy. I'll give you a few minutes with her and then I'll come back in and she'll get her first examination."

Shannon looked down at his daughter. He was shocked as he stared at her. Tears poured down his face as he looked down at her. She looked just like Layne. She had just been born, and Shannon could already tell she looked just like Layne.

"Your beautiful." Shannon whispered, kissing her forehead.

His heart felt heavy. He couldn't believe he was laying here, holding a baby that he had carried to term himself. If he would have went back in time and told himself he was going to be having a baby years down the road, he would have probably whooped his own ass.

A few minutes later, Chris walked in and over to Shannon's bedside.

"So it's over, this is her?" He smiled, leaning in and looking at the baby.

"Yeah this is her." Shannon smiled.

She moved her little hands, furrowing her brows every now and then and squirming lightly.

"Holy shit she is the spitting image of Layne." Chris blurted.

"I know. I can't believe how much she looks like him. I wish he was here." Shannon was going to cry.

"Hey man, I'm real sorry about that guy. He's fucking stupid for not being here. He's gonna regret not being here down the road. You don't need him Shannon. I wouldn't worry about him anymore. Now you've got her. She'll never leave you man."

Shannon sniffled. "I guess your right."

"What are you gonna name her?" Chris smiled, sticking his finger out. The little baby wrapped her small fragile hand around his finger.

"Laina." Shannon smiled.

"Laina? Shannon you sure about that name?" Chris asked.

"I know its weird. I know he doesn't care about us. But I want to name her after him Chris. Her name's gonna be Laina. Laina Nel Hoon." Shannon smiled.

Chris kissed her little head.

"Nel after your mama?" Chris asked.

"Yeah." Shannon smiled.

"When you gonna call her and tell her?" Chris asked.

"Chris! Can I just enjoy this moment right now?" Shannon frowned.

"Geez, sorry Shannon but you know your gonna have to face her, explain everything to her eventually." Chris replied.

Shannon stared down at his baby girl and sighed.

* * *

Shannon leaned back in the patio chair, putting his bare feet on the patio table and crossing them. He smiled to himself as he continued to sip his beer. The memories were as clear as day to him. He remembered that he had waited until the last minute to do anything. He was sent out of the hospital with a baby in his arms, no bassinet, no carseat. No crib, no clothes, no bottles. He and Chris drove straight to the mall to a baby store.

He remembered how the woman sales associate was disgusted with them as they asked for help buying a carseat for her and immediately putting Laina in it before they even paid for it to cart her around the store.

Shannon chuckled to himself and shook his head, downing the rest of the beer.

He thought about how he had first told his mom about Laina. He was so afraid that she was gonna disown him, but she turned out to be excited to be a grandmother.

Shannon moved his feet off of the table and grabbed the empty beer bottle, throwing it away and going back in the house to take care of some chores.

* * *

The day came when Layne was discharged from the hospital and for Shannon to take Layne to rehab. After an emotional goodbye with Laina, Shannon and Layne were in Shannon's car on the way to Indianapolis.

Layne was instructed not to bring anything with him but the clothes on his back.

The car ride was fairly silent the first 30 minutes. Shannon was finally the one to speak up first.

"Are you nervous Layne?" He asked softly.

Layne stared out of the window.

"Yeah."

"I don't want you to be scared. This is gonna be good for you. You can do this. I'm so proud of you for stepping up and doing this. Fuck what everyone else says. This is between me and you and I'm gonna protect you Layne, I'm not gonna let anyone step on you. You're gonna step out of this stronger."

Shannon tried to give him some words of encouragement.

"I sure hope so." Layne mumbled.

Layne wasn't going back to Seattle. Layne have given Shannon the keys to his condo. Layne didn't care what Shannon did with the furniture he had over there. He had instructed Shannon to go over there and clear the place out, bringing back Layne's things and selling or giving away everything else. Shannon had no idea when he was gonna go up there and do it. When Layne got out of rehab, he was gonna live with Shannon and Laina.

Shannon smiled to himself as he thought about it.

Before they knew it, they had arrived at the clinic. Shannon had put the car in park. Layne had gotten out of the car and was staring up at the big ass building. He sighed loudly. Shannon came up beside him and looked at it with him. Shannon could feel a lump in his throat.

He hadn't been here since his rehab stint. It brought up old memories.

"I guess this is it." Layne said, looking down.

"Yeah. This is it. I won't see you in 6 months." Shannon said, voice cracking.

Layne jerked his head up and looked over at Shannon.

"I? What about we? Don't you mean you and Laina?" He asked.

"Oh yeah, sure." Shannon said, lip quivering.

Layne faced Shannon and looked down.

"Shannon I just want to thank you again for stepping up and making me realize that I was ruining my life." He said kicking a rock across the parking lot.

Shannon sniffled and balled his fists up beside his thighs, stretching his thumbs.

"Promise you'll write and call as soon as they give you that privilege." Shannon sniffled.

By now Layne had looked into Shannon's eyes.

"I promise." Layne said softly.

Shannon couldn't resist. He was no longer seeing Layne as the pale, sickly man he first saw when he showed up at his condo on that faithful day, he was seeing his beautiful soul shine again. It had been rekindled by their daughter. Shannon wrapped his arms around Layne's waist, shocking the sickly man.

"Shannon?" Layne asked, tensing.

Shannon leaned in, closing his eyes. Layne turned his head, Shannon's face crashing into his cheek.

"Shannon what are you doing?" Layne asked, head turned.

"C'mon, let me kiss you before you go." Shannon pouted.

Hell he didn't know what he was doing, he wanted to act on impulse. At that exact moment he wanted to kiss Layne.

"No Shannon. You know why." Layne said self consciously.

"I don't care. We don't have to use tongue. For old times sake Layne, kiss me. A kiss for luck. Please, I don't care." Shannon pouted.

Layne slowly turned his head and looked at Shannon. Shannon quickly leaned in and pressed a quick peck to Layne's dry, cracked lips. Shannon blinked and pulled back, looking into Layne's eyes.

Layne leaned back in and kissed Shannon again, pulling away with his eyes closed.

"I forgot how good that feels." Layne said softly, opening his eyes.

"Me too." Shannon blushed.

"Why are you doing this now?" Layne said sadly.

"Think of it as motivation Layne. When you get out, you'll have Laina...and me...." Shannon emphasized "me."

He stroked Layne's cheeks. Layne's eyes filled with tears as Shannon pressed his lips to his again, keeping them there for a few minutes before pulling away.

Shannon held Layne tight as he hugged him.

"I guess you should get going now." Shannon pouted, letting Layne go.

"I guess I should. Before I go, I have something for you." Layne smiled.

Shannon raised a brow as Layne dug in his pocket and pulled out a folded up piece of paper and handed it to Shannon.

"Don't read it until you get home. I guess I already got my answer." Layne smiled.

Shannon smiled and took the note and put it in his pocket.

Layne sighed. "Well, here I go Shannon. The next time you hear from me, I'll be a changed man. I promise."

"Bye Layne." Shannon smiled, tears pouring down his face.

Layne kissed Shannon's lips again before backing away, smiling at Shannon. He finally turned around. Shannon watched as he walked up to the entrance of the clinic and went inside, dissapearing.

Once he was out of site, Shannon leaned against his car and started sobbing hysterically. He had so much emotion built up inside of him. He shakily got in his car and put his seatbelt on, sitting there and sobbing against his steering wheel for a few minutes.

"Please god, please make Layne better. Please, I need him in my life." Shannon begged and sobbed.

Once he composed himself, he finally drove off, leaving Layne behind. He felt like he had just got him back and was losing him all over again.

After Shannon got Laina from his mom and arrived home, he sat Laina in front of the tv to watch her cartoons and then he sat in the kitchen and took the folded up note out of his pocket that Layne had written to him.

_  
Dearest Shannon,_

_Where do I start? How do I put into words how I feel about you? Shannon I still love you. I always loved you. I hate myself for letting you go. I hate myself for giving up on you and Laina. I knew that baby was mine all along. I was just stupid back then. I was so fucking stupid. I wish I could go back in time and change what I did. I am so sorry for putting my hands on you and threatening our baby's life. I remember it as plain as day and my heart aches everyday over it. I know I was only with you guys for one day before all of this shit went down but I just want you to know that was the single greatest day of my life. Shannon you are so sexy and independent. I fell in love with you all over again when you served me dinner. Your house is so spotless and organized. You have really got your life together._

_I am just a mess. I am so glad you came into my life again. I feel confident that I can beat this heroine. Every time I think about my little girl, it motivates me to quit. I'll be thinking of you guys in rehab everyday._

_The more I think about you Shannon, the more my heart hurts. I want to be with you again. I wanna have a life with you. Sorry I didn't have the guts to ask you about this to your face before I left for rehab. Shannon can we get back together when I'm out? I wanna be a family. Me, you and Laina. Just think about it. I want you to love me again. This time my head's in a better place. I'll love you unconditionally this time Shannon, I promise. I love you._

_Love,_

_Layne Staley  
_

 

Shannon bit his lip and held the paper to his chest. He put his head in his hand and sniffled.

"I love you too baby." He whispered, sniffling and kissing the letter.

He would be counting down the days until he could see Layne again.


	5. 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I just wanted to get high. I felt like no one gave a fuck about me. I had total post partum depression. I just wanted to get high. I lied and told you whatever I told you, I can't remember, but I was walking the streets, after just having a baby a mere week before, stomach all stapled up, trying to find a dealer."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> down there I use Marit Larsen in a fictional sense. Shannon has nothing to do with her. The songs are real and she is real but I was using my imagination here.

Shannon was in his studio once again after 2 weeks off. He was finishing up Unified Theory's record. He sat behind the controls as the band recorded the song "A.M. Radio." It was the last song that they were completing for their album.

Shannon was really into the song, bobbing his head and singing the lyrics. It was sounding really good. He fumbled with the controls and looked through the pane glass as the band performed.

When the song was over, Shannon pressed the stop button. He held thumbs up to the band and sat back in his chair.

Shannon couldn't help but let his mind wander to Layne. It had been a week. What was Layne going through? Was he okay?

"Shannon? Shannon! Yoo hoo Shannon!" Chris called snapping his fingers in Shannon's face.

"Hmm?" Shannon asked looking up at Chris.

"Man are you okay?" Chris smiled.

The other guys in the band had disappeared into the studio.

"Not really." Shannon sighed. "I just got a lot of stuff going on at home right now. It's a fucking bummer."

"Why don't we go out to eat and talk about it?" Chris said hitting Shannon's shoulder.

"I guess we could." Shannon smiled half heartedly.

All the other guys left eventually and Chris sat around waiting for Shannon to finish up polishing some songs and close up shop for the day.

They took Chris's car and Chris drove them to a local diner. They sat at a booth.

"Wow it's been a while since we fucking hung out. How's life going? How's little Laina?" Chris asked looking over his menu.

"Life is pretty good. Dude, Laina's 6 now." Shannon smiled.

"No shit, really? Time has really flown by Shannon. She was just a little toddler last time I saw her!" Chris smiled looking up from his menu.

"I got a recent picture of her." Shannon smiled, pulling out his wallet and showing Chris a picture.

"Aw look at her. She's so cute." Chris smiled.

Shannon put his wallet up and looked over his menu.

"So what about you, anything going on with you besides the band?" Shannon smiled.

"Well, I don't mean to brag, but I'm kinda seeing someone. Have been for a few years now." Chris gushed looking up at Shannon from his menu.

"That's so nice your finally happy Chris. You did so much for me when I was pregnant with Laina. You deserve some happiness. What's her name?" Shannon asked.

"It's not a woman." Chris smiled.

Shannon put his menu down. "Get the fuck out of here. No way, you? I had no idea." Shannon said surprised.

Chris shrugged. "I didn't really know either, it just sort of happened and well, here I am."

"What's his name? Tell me about him!" Shannon smiled.

Just as Chris was getting ready to spill the beans, a waitress came up to take their orders. They ordered their drinks and food and put the menus up. Shannon tapped on the table.

"Well back to it then, what's his name? What's he like?" Shannon smiled.

"You already know him." Chris smiled.

"I do?" Shannon asked, furrowing his brows.

Chris smiled big and nodded.

"Well who is it already!?" Shannon exclaimed.

"I'll show you a picture." Chris smiled getting his wallet out and slowly opening it.

He looked at his wallet and then up at Shannon.

"Chris just show me!" Shannon exclaimed, smiling.

"Oh alright. Here." He said turning his wallet around.

Shannon looked at the picture that was stuffed into the wallet. He squinted his eyes.

"Wait, let me see that." He said grabbing the wallet and looking at it closely.

Shannon gasped and looked up at Chris.

"I fucking knew it! I always fucking knew it! You two always connected when we were all in Blind Melon together! Aw you guys are so cute together!" Shannon smiled turning the wallet around and holding it up.

It was a picture of Chris and Brad Smith, hugged up together.

Chris's face was red as he snatched his wallet back and putting it up.

"So at what point did you two get together?" Shannon was so interested in his story.

"MMM..." Chris mumbled sipping his drink. "After you quit Blind Melon, I don't know, I just really missed working with him. I called him up one day and we just got together and jammed. One thing led to another and eh...now I'm here.."

 

"I'm so happy for you Chris! This is just great!" Shannon smiled.

"Well what about you, you said you had a situation going on at home or something? What's going on?" Chris asked.

Shannon sighed. He was fixing to explain everything to his old pal.

"Well, one day I was watching tv, and they started talking about Layne. They showed a picture of him..." Shannon started.

"Oh fuck, I've seen that pic, he looks like total shit! I heard he does drugs all day and is a total recluse and that he won't come out of his house!" Chris replied.

"Well, I kinda sorta...went over there." Shannon admitted.

"What? You did? No fucking shit. Did you see him?" Chris asked.

"Yeah. I did. I went to see him because he looked like he was dying from that picture I saw. I don't know, I just wanted him to see his daughter before he waisted away. When I went over there, his house was a mess, there was trash everywhere and it smelled like cat piss in there."

"Oh eewwww." Chris frowned.

"Well, I pretty much told him up front why I was there, and he still tried to deny that Laina is his daughter. I got so mad I slapped him across his face. I forced him to look at a picture of her. He pissed me off so bad I was going to go back home and just say fuck it and forget about him, but later that morning, he called my cell phone. I had left a picture of Laina over there with my number on it. It was like he had a revelation or something Chris, he wanted to see her and everything, so I made arrangements to bring him down here."

Chris looked surprised.

"Is Layne here in town right now?"

"No. I'm getting to that Chris. Well he met Laina. Laina was scared of him at first, but she warmed up to him in a few hours. Chris it was so heartbreaking. He felt so guilty, he was crying and everything. I saw him fall in love with her over the course of a day."

"So you aren't still mad that he dumped you before she was born?" Chris asked.

"No no....I had to let that go because I want Laina to know she has 2 parents. I want her to feel loved. Well get this, he wasn't at my house for a fucking day, and later that night he started having bad withdrawals. Laina got up in the middle of the night and snuck in his room and saw him on the floor of the bathroom throwing up. She woke me up and I walked down there and saw him. I had to call an ambulance and everything.

In the hospital, after Layne's withdrawals calmed down, he begged me to help him. He was crying and he made me cry. He begged and pleaded and I agreed to help him. He's been in rehab for a week now."

"Wow Shannon, that's just, unbelievable. I mean, what's he gonna do when he gets out?" Chris asked.

"He's gonna live with us. He doesn't want to go back to Seattle. Chris he's in love with me. He gave me a note before he went into rehab asking to get back together with me." Shannon smiled. "He said he wants us to be a family."

"Let me guess, you're gonna take him back?" Chris asked.

"Well...yeah. I feel like this was fate or something." Shannon gushed.

"Well as long as your happy, that's all that matters." Chris shrugged.

"His attitude totally changed when he met Laina Chris. He kept constantly apologizing to me for things he done in the past. I trust him, and Laina fucking loves him. She asks about him everyday and it breaks my heart. She doesn't understand what's going on with him. She thinks hes real sick and she's scared she won't ever see him again. I can't wait until he gets through the first half of the program so he can call home."

Their food had been set down in front of them by then.

Chris started eating.

"Sounds like you've saved his life." Chris smiled.

"I did, I did. I don't think his family or anyone knows he's here. We just up and left." Shannon replied.

There was silence as the two men ate and Shannon spoke again.

"Say Chris, you think you and Brad could help me do something?" He asked.

"Well depends on what it is?" Chris smirked.

"Well, Layne wants me to go to Seattle and clear out his condo. He wants me to get all of his things and just sell the furniture. Also, I need to get up there soon because I'm pretty sure that poor cat is still there. It's probably not ate in 2 weeks." Shannon began.

"Do you guys maybe wanna go up there with me and help me get his things? I think it will have to be a road trip and we should get a U-Haul, because I'm not sure how much shit Layne has."

He sighed and waited for an answer.

"Sure we could do that. I'll talk to Brad, I'm sure he'll agree. We can totally do that. Man we haven't been to Seattle since we all were living there together as Blind Melon!" Chris smiled.

"You guys should bring your guitars. We can jam on the way up there!" Shannon said excitedly.

They finished eating and conversed some more. Chris got out his cell phone and called Brad right away and hammered out the details of this little road trip to fetch Layne's things in Seattle.

* * *

Shannon tucked Laina into bed for the night. She was unusually quiet that night.

"You alright Laina? Why are you so quiet?" Shannon asked.

She pouted and shrugged.

"Woop here's Violet!" Shannon smiled softly handing her her favorite purple bear.

She smiled lightly and hugged the bear close to her. Shannon smiled warmly and looked down at her, rubbing her forehead.

Her temperature felt normal.

"You want a story?" Shannon asked.

Laina shook her head.

"You want a song?" He tried again.

Laina still shook her head.

Shannon leaned down and kissed her on her forehead.

"You still miss daddy Layne?" Shannon asked.

Laina nodded, putting Violet's hand in her mouth. Shannon pulled it out.

"Baby we talked about this. Daddy's very sick, he's gonna be gone for a while so he can get better. What did he tell you? Huh? He told you that Violet's gonna keep you company while he's gone. So whenever you feel sad and miss him, just hug Violet. Daddy thinks about you every day." Shannon cooed, running his hand through her hair.

Laina smiled and clutched Violet.

"Sweetie you sure you don't want a story or a song?" Shannon asked.

"A song daddy." Laina smiled a little.

"Okay. A song. Let me get my guitar. I know just the one baby."

Shannon got up and got his acoustic guitar and sat back down. Laina watched as Shannon tuned his guitar. He started playing it lightly, singing "3 is a magic number" to his daughter. He improvised some of the song at the part about the family of 3. She giggled as he sang it.

Once the song was finished, he put the guitar down. Laina was fighting sleep.

"Good night baby." Shannon smiled kissing her forehead.

He grabbed his guitar and shut the light off, walking out down the hall to his room.

* * *

The next morning, Shannon had to break the news to Laina. He and the guys were rolling out. Unified Theory were fixing to go on a small tour so they had to go ahead and do this thing. As usual, Laina threw a fit.

It broke Shannon's heart that he had to keep leaving her like this.

She lay on her bed crying as Shannon started packing her suitcase.

"Honey I'm only gonna be gone a few days and I'll be back. You always have fun at gramma's house. Cheer up, your uncles are coming over soon. You haven't seen them in a very long time." Shannon replied as he continued to pack her bag.

Once he was done he came over to her bedside.

"Hey, Laina, listen, I know it seems like I'm always leaving you right now, but I assure you things will get better when daddy gets out of the hospital. That's where me and your uncles are going, we're going to get daddy's stuff. Daddy's gonna live here once he's all better. Cheer up honey. Aren't you glad daddy's gonna live here?" Shannon cooed.

Laina nodded and sniffled, smiling.

"C'mon, it's almost time for your uncles to arrive." Shannon smiled standing up.

Laina sniffled and got up and followed him in the living room. They were sitting there watching tv when all of a sudden the doorbell rang.

Shannon jumped up and answered the door. Chris and Brad greeted him with smiles.

"Hey Brad!" Shannon smiled, hugging him and kissing his cheek. "Chris." Shannon smiled doing the same to Chris.

They were taking Brad's SUV, with the U-Haul attached to the back of it. Shannon let them in the house.

"Wow Shannon, nice digs." Brad smiled looking around. "Where's your little girl?" Brad smiled.

"In here, c'mon guys." Shannon replied leading them into the living room.

Laina sat on the couch watching tv.

"Laina come over here and see your uncles!" Shannon smiled.

Laina looked over at Chris and Brad and slowly got up, looking down as she came over to Shannon, standing behind him and peeking up at them.

"Wow, holy cow, Laina! The last time I saw you, you were this tall!" Chris smiled gesturing how short she was last time he saw her.

"You've really grown girl!" Chris smiled.

Laina smiled shly up at him.

"Laina say Hi uncle Chris." Shannon smiled.

"Hi uncle Chris." Laina repeated softly.

"Say hi to uncle Brad." Shannnon smiled running his hand through her hair.

She was standing beside Shannon now, hugging his legs.

"Hi uncle Brad."

"Hey Laina, oh Shannon she's so cute!" Brad smiled.

They all stood there conversing for a little while and then it was time to roll out. Shannon grabbed their bags and they all piled into Brad's SUV. They stopped at Shannon's mom's house so he could drop Laina off. After another emotional goodbye, Shannon came back in the car with the guys.

Shannon was driving for the first few hours. Brad and Chris sat in the seat behind the front seats. They were off, their journey to Seattle began.

The first hour was fairly silent, the radio playing faint music as Shannon drove. Brad and Chris carried on a conversation about Unified Theory.

Brad finally broke the silence.

"Shannon I think it's great that you and Layne are back together." He smiled.

"Huh?" Shannon asked.

He was staring at the road so long that he was starting to stare at it blindly.

"I said I think it's wonderful that you and Layne are back together. You need someone in your life. You've raised that baby on your own up until now. You've worked so hard. I don't see how you've done it Shannon. I would have ended up losing my mind."

"I almost did at times. But my mom's helped me out alot with her too." Shannon replied.

"How did you go without getting laid for so long?" Brad blurted.

"Brad! Stop it!" Chris frowned.

Shannon smiled and shook his head.

"It's okay Chris. He's right, I haven't done that in a long time. Life has been too busy. My main priority is the well being of Laina. I had to push all of that to the side. She keeps me real busy."

"Wait so you haven't been with anyone else since Layne?" Chris asked, surprised.

"Nope. Well unless you count when I was on drugs. I was sucking dick for dope." Shannon replied.

"Shit Shannon." Chris replied.

"Chris I remember right after I had Laina, I dumped her off on you. Do you remember when I went out and I came home and my stomach was bleeding because one of the staples had popped out of the place where they had closed up the c-section? And you had to take me back to the Emergency Room?" Shannon began.

"Yeah...oh god Shannon. You didn't." Chris furrowed his brows.

"I just wanted to get high. I felt like no one gave a fuck about me. I had total post partum depression. I just wanted to get high. I lied and told you whatever I told you, I can't remember, but I was walking the streets, after just having a baby a mere week before, stomach all stapled up, trying to find a dealer. I remember I met this guy and we talked and I went back to his place and I sucked his dick and he gave me some coke, he made me snort it of his erection. Then he wanted to fuck me and I tried to tell him I couldn't do it but he gave me more coke, and I got even more fucked up. Next thing I know I'm on my knees and he's got my pants down and he fucked me and my stomach started hurting and I told him to stop but he wouldn't. I was too high to pull away and when he was done, I looked down and I was bleeding."

"Fuck Shannon, that's a fucking sad story." Brad pouted.

"I had no idea Shannon." Chris replied.

"Yeah Chris, that's why I moved in with my mother. I thought I could get out of California and stop using. I was addicted to crack. I started dumping Laina off on my mother in Indiana. I found the dealers there.

I just thank god that I was living with my mother at the time of my overdose. I could have been dead if I was living on my own and it happened. That fucking overdose was a wake up call, I was lucky I wasn't fucking dead. I had to get my shit together and stop feeling sorry for myself. My situation was just what it was. I had to cope to raise my daughter. I had to go to rehab."

Shannon sighed. He had never really talked about this before.

"Shannon I wish I could have done more to help you." Chris pouted.

"I was just immature. I didn't realize that once you have a baby, it becomes all about the baby. The baby is first priority. I was just so fucked up. And then the constant reminder of Layne. God she's so much like him. It killed me."

Shannon was going to cry.

"Shannon maybe we shouldn't talk about this right now, I mean, you are driving and all." Brad suggested.

"No. I'll be okay. Please let me talk. I've kept all of this in for so long." Shannon sniffled wiping his eyes with one hand.

"Mom used to threaten me a lot when I came in high. She used to say she was gonna report me to child services and take custody of my daughter. The night of my overdose, we argued so bad. I fucking hit my mom and I called her a bitch and I went out and got a fucking speedball and I came back home and I fucking cooked it and shot it up right in the middle of the living room. She walked in on me with the needle in my arm. I fucking blacked out after that."

Brad and Chris could do nothing but frown. They had no idea how bad Shannon's addiction had gotten.

"I fucking dropped Laina one time." Shannon's voice quivered.

He steered with one hand and wiped his tears with the other.

"I was so fucking lucky she didn't hit her head. I was fucking high and for some fucking reason I was holding her. It was just fate that it wasn't as bad as it could have been. Her little leg was broken. I didn't even fucking realize it until the next day. I just fucking picked her up and put her in her crib. She was screaming and crying and I didn't even fucking know why."

"Fuck Shannon. That's some dark shit. But look at you now Shannon. You're so much better than you were back then." Chris pouted.

"I know, I know. I couldn't keep doing Blind Melon. I was gonna die if I did. Every night we went out, someone was waiting to get me high. It was a long and hard road.

Once Layne gets out, I'll be truly happy. He'll complete me. I haven't been in love for a while. I will admit, it does get fucking lonely being a single parent. You can't always hold conversations with kids that you can with adults. I never let Laina see me break down. I had to be strong for her. I want her to grow up strong."

They all got silent. Shannon sniffled and wiped his eyes again.

"Hey look, let's do something to lighten the mood here Shannon. You wanna sing something?" Chris smiled, getting up and leaning over his seat to grab his guitar.

He sat back down, carefully maneuvering the acoustic in his lap as not to hit Brad.

"Sure. What should we sing?" Shannon smiled as he drove.

"Let's do Galaxie. Do you remember the lyrics?" Chris smiled.

"Yeah. Yeah I think I can do it." Shannon smiled, clearing his throat.

Chris smiled and started strumming his guitar. Brad and Shannon started singing in unison. Shannon could still remember all the words after all these years.

He smiled as he belted out the lyrics, swaying back and forth, both hands on the wheel as he steered and drove.

Next up, they played "You Ain't Got No Bidness." Brad sang the lead vocals on this one. Chris smiled as he looked back and forth from the two, strumming his guitar.

Shannon was having fun.

They continued their setlist. It included Change, The Pusher, Soup, Skinned, No Rain, I Wonder. Brad sung a few songs he knew and played guitar after a while. Before they knew it, they had been driving 10 hours straight. Shannon was getting tired so they made a pit stop to use the bathroom and get something to eat and rest for a little while.

When they got back on the road, Brad got behind the wheel. Shannon took a nap against Chris.

* * *

It took over 34 hours to get to Seattle. They had eventually stopped to get a hotel room along the way and rest. When they finally made it to Seattle, they drove to the condo complex where Layne had been living. By then it had been almost 3 weeks since he had been there.

"This place is huge. How the hell are we gonna get the furniture out of there?" Brad complained.

"I don't know. We'll figure something out guys. We'll call around and see if we can pay someone to take it out. C'mon let's just get this over with." Shannon replied.

All three men entered the lobby, and started walking the flights of stairs.

Shannon didn't like this place. This was the place where Layne had moved to to die pretty much. If Shannon hadn't come to him when he did, Layne would probably have died here. He led the way as they finally came up on Layne's condo. There was a pile of mail on the floor in front of the door. Shannon was surprised no one had stolen any of it.

Shannon gathered the pieces of mail and unlocked the door to the condo. They all stepped inside. Shannon shut the door behind him.

"Fucking A, it's ripe in here! Open some windows...god!" Brad exclaimed holding his nose and fanning the air in front of him.

"We gotta get that cat first. Where is that cat? What was the fucker's name um...Sandy? I think. Sandy? Sandy where are you!?" Shannon asked.

Did Layne even have a cat carrier?

"You guys start looking around and see if there's a pet taxi laying around here somewhere." Shannon replied.

"Watch out for the needles!" Chris said pointing to the heroine needles that lay on the floor in front of the coffee table.

Chris and Brad walked into Layne's bedroom and started to look around. Shannon looked on the coffee table and saw the black book that had the heart on it. He curiously picked it up and opened it.

Shannon nearly fell out when he saw a picture of he and Layne from the early 90's. Shannon's hair was so long, as was Layne's. Layne's curly hair.

"Oh my god, he still has these..." Shannon smiled wide.

He flipped through the photobook. It was nothing but pictures of he and Shannon. They were bringing back memories for Shannon. Shannon's thoughts were interrupted when he heard a cat screech and a loud tackle.

"Hey what the fuck are you guys doing?" Shannon called.

"Chris has got the cat!" Brad exclaimed.

Shannon ran into Layne's bedroom and saw Chris standing there, holding the poor stressed out cat by the nape of its neck. The cat squirmed and tried to claw Chris. He held it out.

"Find the carrier! Quick!" He exclaimed.

His shirt was littered with cat hair. Shannon ran to the empty bedroom and he saw a carrier. He quickly grabbed it and ran back into Layne's bedroom and opened it.

"Drop it in! Drop it in!" Shannon exclaimed.

Chris quickly stuffed the cat into the box and Shannon set it down on the floor, locking the latches on it. The cat cried loudly.

"Fuck! That fucking thing is quick!" Chris breathed, trying to wipe the fur off of his shirt.

Brad and Shannon laughed.

"Good, got this fucker squared away now let's open some doors and windows." Shannon replied.

They opened Layne's front door and opened windows in the house. They had came prepared with trashbags to stuff Layne's shit in.

"Let's start in his bedroom. Just take everything out of his closet." Shannon replied.

"This is gonna be a long fucking day...all those stairs we have to keep going up and down." Brad complained.

"Oh you'll be fine!" Shannon replied.

They went in Layne's bedroom and started taking his clothes and shoving them in trashbags. The things in his closet were already stuffed in boxes, so they were glad about that.

After a while, they had a bunch of Layne's things sitting outside of his front door. The cat was still in the carrier and crying.

After a few hours, they had Layne's room and the living room cleaned out. They took a break, sitting outside. Luckily Layne actually had bottles of water in his refrigerator, beside the rotting food.

"Fuck I'm not gonna feel like moving all of that fucking furniture." Brad complained.

"We'll figure something out Brad. Calm down." Chris smiled.

They were all sitting there when suddenly two women walked up, the older one crying. They stopped in front of Layne's door and looked at the three men who were sitting on the ground with a look that could kill.

"Um, can we help you?" Shannon asked, brows furrowed.

"Who the hell are you? Where's my son!?" The older woman cried.

Shannon's eyes widened. Fuck no, not this shit today, he wasn't in the mood to deal with this. He quickly realized who the two women must have been.

"Where's my son!" The older woman exclaimed, walking into Layne's condo.

"What the fuck is all of this? What are you doing with my brother's things?" The younger woman frowned before going into the condo behind the older woman.

Brad and Chris looked at Shannon with furrowed brows.

"Shannon who are they?" Chris whispered loudly.

"I think that's Layne's mom, the other one must be his sister." Shannon sighed, standing up.

He walked into the apartment. The women were looking around.

"Liz, get on the phone and call the police!" The older woman instructed the younger one.

"Whoa whoa whoa! Hey don't do that! You don't understand what's going on here!" Shannon exclaimed, rushing over to the phone before Layne's sister could.

"I haven't heard from my son in 3 weeks. What the fuck is going on here!? I came over here to make sure he's still alive and he's not even here and you people are over here fucking taking all of his things! These are not yours! This is stealing!" The woman cried.

"Let's all just calm down here. Let's just sit down, and I can explain everything. No one call the police. I'm just doing what Layne wanted me to do. Layne wanted me to come over and grab his things." Shannon replied, holding his hands up.

"What? Who the fuck are you? Where's my brother! We're worried sick about him!" Layne's sister exclaimed.

"Let's just sit down, please." Shannon replied.

The room was very tense. Layne's mom frowned as she and Layne's sister sat on the couch. Shannon sat on the opposite end and grabbed the black photo book off of the table, holding it to his chest.

"I understand this looks fishy. I didn't really expect you to show up here today. I know Layne should have contacted you and let you know what was going on. Things happened so fast over the past couple of weeks..." Shannon rambled.

"Get to the point! Where's my son!?" Layne's mom cried.

His sister rubbed her back.

Brad and Chris stayed outside.

"Well first of all, my name's Shannon Hoon. Me and Layne used to date in the early 90s." Shannon started.

They stared at him. He opened up Layne's photobook and showed them the proof.

"See, right there, that's me with Layne." Shannon smiled.

"Well what are you doing here? I still don't understand why you are over here removing my son's belongings from his home." Layne's mother cried.

"Cuz this isn't Layne's home anymore." Shannon replied. "Layne's gonna live with me now."

"And where would that be?" Layne's sister said, skeptical.

"I'm sorry, I can't tell you that information. You don't understand at all what is going on. Layne's in rehab right now."

Before Shannon could even finish his sentence, the women gasped, holding onto each other.

"Oh god, my son's in rehab..." Layne's mother wailed.

"Yeah, he's in rehab...he's gonna get better. He just can't live here anymore. This place was running him down. Ma'am, I came out here to discuss something with Layne, and we just reconnected...and he's gone off to rehab so he can get better and me and him can live a happy life together. I promise you I am not stealing his things, this is what he wanted me to do. He can't call or contact anyone from outside of the clinic for the next 6 months. He's been there for 2 weeks so far, so I have no idea how he's doing out there. I won't know for 6 months." Shannon pouted.

The two women sat there, embracing each other, trying to process all of this.

"There's more." Shannon said hesitantly.

He wasn't sure he wanted to tell them about Laina.

"Oh god what else?" Layne's sister exclaimed, embracing her mother.

"In 1994 I gave birth to a girl. Um. Layne's her father." Shannon said softly.

"You what? Layne what? Why hasn't Layne told us about any of this!?" Layne's mother exclaimed, looking at Layne's sister.

"Excuse my language, but I went through some shit with your son. He tried to say my daughter was not his. He was the only person I had ever been with at that point." Shannon started.

They just looked at him. They must have already knew that some men could get pregnant. They weren't freaking out or anything. Maybe times had changed though, maybe more people knew that fact now.

"I pretty much came here because I saw a recent picture of Layne. I came out here to try and get him to get off of his ass and come see his daughter, and it worked, and here we are. He wants to be with his family when he gets out of rehab, not here." Shannon said.

"But we're his family too...why won't you tell us where he is!?" Layne's mom cried.

"Ma'am, I can't, out of respect to him. No offense, but he's real upset with you. He told me you put that picture of him out to the public. He doesn't want to be bothered. He just wants to be with me and Laina and be left alone." Shannon said sadly.

Layne's mother sobbed, covering her face with her hands.

"You wanna see a picture of her?" Shannon asked softly.

"Yeah..." Layne's sister smiled a little.

"I'm Liz by the way, this is Nancy." She replied, gesturing to Layne's sobbing mother.

"I never gave that picture to anyone...this interviewer guy came to my house, and I let him in and he stole it from me!" Nancy cried.

Shannon pouted as he got his wallet out. He took out a recent photo of Laina and handed it to her.

"Ms. Nancy, this is Laina, your grand daughter." He smiled.

Nancy took the picture out of Shannon's hand and looked at it. She and Liz gasped at the same time and looked over at Shannon. Once they saw that picture of Laina, they knew Shannon was telling the truth. There was no denying that the blonde haired blue eyed child was Layne's.

"She looks just like Layne!" Layne's mom cried.

"How old is she?" Liz asked.

"She's 6." Shannon smiled.

"Where is she? I want to see her!" Nancy exclaimed.

Shannon's face fell.

"Um. She's not here. She's staying with my mom. Look, you please just have to understand. This is all happening so fast for her. I don't think it's really a good idea for you to see her right now. She just met her daddy a few weeks ago. Give him some time to get to know her first. We're trying to work on getting our family back together, with Layne in rehab and all. I'm asking you to please just respect us. If you give me your address, I can send pictures of her to you. Just please, try to understand. I don't want to put all of this on her little shoulders right now." Shannon said sadly.

"I...this...I'm so worried about Layne." Nancy cried.

"I know, I know, I'll tell you what, you give me your number too and I'll keep you posted on what's going on with him. As I said, right now he's going through the first step in rehab. 6 months of no contact with the outside world. I promise you I fucking love Layne, and I would never do anything to hurt him or his family purposely. He just needs time. Things will get right again, we just have to give him time. I know it hurts, but he can no longer live here. As soon as Layne's ready, I promise I will call you and tell you where we are and you guys can come on over to our place and meet Laina and reconnect with Layne." Shannon replied.

 

He stood up, followed by them. To Shannon's surprise, the women bumrushed him into a hug. Shannon awkwardly wrapped his arms around them.

* * *

Chris and Brad eventually came back into the room. Shannon explained that they were taking Layne's belongings and none of the furniture. Layne just wanted to get rid of it. Layne's mom and sis agreed to take care of the furniture situation, to the relief of the three men.

They stayed and helped the women tidy up the place, throwing away the used drug paraphernalia, cleaning out the fridge. Shannon let Nancy have the picture of Laina, with the promise of sending her more.

It was dark by the time they were all finished dealing with Layne's condo. Liz was going to keep Layne's cat. Layne's shit was stuffed into the U-Haul, filling the whole thing up surprisingly. He had more shit then they had thought.

The guys spent the night in Seattle before heading back out to Indiana.

* * *

It had been a few months since Layne had went to rehab. Seasons changed and Laina was back in school. Shannon was hard at work in his studio.

This time he was producing a record for a sweet young girl from Norway, Marit Larsen. Shannon loved her folk sound. They were currently working on a song of hers called "Only A Fool."

Shannon was blown away at how much it resembled the style of music he played with Blind Melon. He was very excited about this song, so excited that he put his intern at the controls and he was in the studio with Marit, singing her background vocals and playing acoustic guitar while she played the banjo. The rest of the band sit around them with the other instruments. They were recording live.

Once the song was done, Shannon smiled and hugged her and kissed her cheek. He went outside of the studio and sat beside the intern to roll playback and make sure he was doing things right. Marit came over to him and listened with them.

"Oh you know what would be so cool...what if we added clapping in here, like this." Shannon said excitedly, clapping to the beat of the song.

Marit smiled and started clapping with Shannon. "Oh yeah, I like that, that sounds pretty cool!" She said in her accent.

So there they were again, he and Marit, back in the studio, rolling the track again to add clapping to it. Shannon was having the time of his life. This was one of the best albums he had ever worked on. He wanted to sing every song with this girl on this album, she was so amazing.

They smiled at each other as they clapped through the song. After they were done, they went back and listened to playback.

"It's perfect!" Shannon smiled, pulling Marit into a hug.

The intern got up and Shannon sat back down, getting ready to record the next track. Marit and the band went back into the studio and put their instruments on. Shannon pressed the button.

"Rolling." He said into the intercom.

He smiled and bobbed his head as the band started to play the next song, "Ten Steps." Shannon messed with the buttons on the board and lip synced the words.

As he was working, he felt his cell phone vibrate in his pocket. He pulled it out and looked at it, not recognizing the number. He opened it and pulled the antenna up.

"Hello?" He asked, putting his finger to his ear.

"...Shannon?" A voice sounded.

"Um, this is he. Who is this calling?" Shannon asked standing up.

"It's me, Layne..."

Shannon's heart nearly beat out of his chest. He felt his legs turn to jello.

"Rodney! Come here! Take over!" Shannon screamed at the intern as he quickly walked out of the room and to the lounge of the studio, sitting on the couch.

"Layne...oh my god, is it really you?" Shannon's voice cracked.

He had not expected this. Wait, it had only been 5 months, how was Layne calling him? They weren't allowed that privilege until 6 months! Shannon didn't care right about then, he missed Layne's voice.

"Yeah its me. How are you doing?" Layne asked.

"I'm fucking fine right about now...fuck how I'm doing. The most important question is how are YOU doing!?" Shannon exclaimed.

He felt like he was going to cry.

Layne was silent for a moment. Shannon felt like he would faint at any moment.

"Layne?" Shannon said desperately into the phone.

"I'm doing real good..." Layne said quietly.

"Really? Don't fucking lie to me, this is very important to me. Layne there's a lot riding on this. You're really doing okay?" Shannon was crying now.

"Babe I swear I'm doing real good. My withdrawals stopped Shannon. I'm feeling better, I've been on the whole foods plant based diet. I feel so fucking great." Layne said into the phone.

Shannon's heart melted. He sobbed into the phone.

"Layne, you don't know how much that means to me. That you're doing good. I can hear it in your voice. I wanna see you so fucking bad. I can't believe you called me. How did you get to start calling me so early? I thought you had to wait another month." Shannon sniffled.

"I'm doing so well, they granted me this privlege early. I just had to hear your fucking voice Shannon. I haven't heard it in so long. I kept replaying that day you dropped me off to rehab, when you kissed me. That and Laina's drawing of us has gotten me through this. I can't wait to see you guys again." Layne sobbed into the phone.

"Oh baby. I got your stuff here at our house. I saw that photo book you have, the black one with the heart on it." Shannon smiled into the phone.

He would refrain from telling Layne about the meeting with his family in Seattle right now.

"Oh yeah?" Layne smiled.

"I love it. I can't believe you still have all those pictures of us." Shannon smiled.

"I fucking love you Shannon. I wish I was there to kiss you. I got all of my teeth pulled, I have new dentures. I wanna shove my tongue down your throat!" Layne exclaimed.

"Oh baby that's so great. There's nothing wrong with that. I'm glad your starting to like yourself again. How's your skin, has it cleared up?" Shannon smiled.

"Yeah, a lot actually. This whole foods diet really works. I feel so good, even better everyday. My color's back, my face has filled back out. I'm feeling new and fresh." Layne smiled into the phone. "This place is really great."

Shannon held onto the phone for dear life.

"How's my baby?" Layne asked into the phone.

"She's real good. She's back in school, 1st grade now. She misses you so much Layne. She constantly asks about you." Shannon smiled.

"She's my little angel. I can't wait to get out of here and be with you guys. I wanna go on vacation. I wanna see her little face light up at Christmas." Layne rambled.

"You will, in time. So do you have any friends there?" Shannon asked.

"Yeah, I've got a few people I talk to. I don't really tell alot of my business though. I mostly just tell them about you guys. I don't talk about Alice in Chains or anything. My sponsor's really cool. I've told her everything. She helps me get through alot of shit. Her name's Verna. She's a strong woman, man, you wouldn't believe the shit she's been through."

"That all sounds just great..." Shannon sniffled and smiled.

"There's another thing they don't tell you about this whole foods diet and healthy living..." Layne muttered.

"What's that?" Shannon asked, furrowing his brows slightly.

"How fucking horny it makes you. I'm so fucking horny all the time Shannon." Layne said lowly into the phone.

Shannon bit his lip and smiled. Layne was back to his old self, always super horny, all the time. Shannon felt like he was in his 20s again.

"What do you do about it?" Shannon asked.

"Rub one out. See when you can come up here and visit me Shannon, I was wondering would you mind coming by yourself the first visit...so we can...um, get to know each other again?" Layne mumbled into the phone.

He sounded desperate and nervous. Shannon's face felt hot. He was nervous too. He felt like Layne was asking him out on his first date again.

"You sure?" Shannon asked softly, biting his lip.

"God yes. I want you so bad Shannon. I see your face in my dreams. You know I have no magazines or computers or games here so what's a guy to do all day but think about his man?" Layne smiled.

"I guess we could um, do that." Shannon said softly.

"You don't sound too enthusiastic about it." Layne said sadly.

"I just...Layne I haven't thought about myself sexually in like...5 years or something. Don't forget I had a baby to raise. I put my whole being into raising her." Shannon replied.

"I'm so fucking sorry I wasn't there..." Layne said getting emotional.

"No no baby, I know, I'm just saying. I feel nervous...I don't even think I remember what to do. I don't even think I can get it up anymore...I don't know." Shannon rambled nervously.

Layne chuckled.

"I haven't fucked in years either Shannon. We'll do this together, we'll rediscover what feels good. I so fucking wish I could feel you right now. I'm fucking lovesick over here. You should see my journal. These folks let us write whatever we want in it!" Layne smiled.

"What do you write about?" Shannon smiled.

"I write about you mostly." Layne chuckled.

"What kind of things? Dirty things?" Shannon asked.

Layne was silent and then laughed lightly. Shannon heard shuffling around and papers crumpling.

"Here, I'll read some of it to you." Layne smiled.

Shannon smiled and laid back on the couch.

 

"Let's see. Okay, here's one." Layne smiled, clearing his throat. "It's hard for me to put into words how I feel about him. He means everything to me. I am not only doing this for myself, but for him, for our daughter. I didn't deserved to be saved, but he did it anyway. I deserved to just rot for the way I did him years ago. He has shown me the meaning of forgiveness. He's so kind and strong. He's the strongest person I've ever met. When I get out of here, I'm gonna take care of him. He has done so much for everyone, it's time for him to start being taken care of. He's my light in the darkness, my shelter from the cold. I love him with every fiber of my being. He gave me my beautiful daughter.

My daughter is so perfect. She's so happy and innocent. I fucking love him for taking care of her. Making sure she's safe. I can't wait to be reunited with them. Getting that feeling of euphoria from the junk, that is not worth risking all of this. I have a place where I'm wanted now, around people who truly care about me. I don't need the junk anymore. I feel truly fulfilled. My feeling of euphoria comes naturally when I think about the two most important people in my life, Shannon and Laina."

"Stop, stop it Layne...fuck!" Shannon sobbed loudly.

"What is it?" Layne asked sadly.

"No, I didn't mean to sound snippy...it's just, i'm at work right now and you're making me cry. Baby all that stuff...I feel like its the early 90s again, before you got into all the drugs." Shannon sobbed.

"Okay okay, i'll stop. Here's some dirty stuff." Layne smiled flipping a few pages. "I want Shannon to fill me up. I want to become one with him again. I want him to trail his lips down my chest and kiss my inner thighs. I want our legs tangled together, our bodies pushing together, feeling each other's skin, staring into each other's eyes, into each other's souls. I want Shannon to trail his hands down my thighs, running his tongue down my back and crevice as he drops to his knees behind me-"

Shannon laid there on the couch, his eyes closed, his heart rate picking up. He could imagine everything Layne was describing when suddenly the intern Rodney busted in, scaring the shit out of Shannon. Shannon sat up quickly.

"What is it Rodney!?" He exclaimed.

"Uh I just came back here to check on you sir..." He replied.

"I'm fine, I'm in the middle of an important phonecall. Just go go, keep rolling! I'll be there later to check your work!" Shannon shooed him away.

Rodney high tailed it out of there, shutting the door behind him.

"Oh...maybe I should read this to you when you're in your room alone." Layne smiled into the phone.

"Yeah, but what I heard so far is really hot baby." Shannon smiled.

They laughed together and there was silence again.

"Who would have known that you were gonna have my baby? It's so fucking weird the way the world works. How times change. I wouldn't have wanted any other person to have my child." Layne smiled.

"I wouldn't have wanted anyone else to make one with me." Shannon smiled, running his fingers through his short hair.

"What if we tried to make another one when I got out?" Layne blurted.

"Excuse me?" Shannon asked, furrowing his brows.

"I don't know..." Layne mumbled.

Shannon laughed lightly. "Layne you have too much time to think there. You're talking a little crazy now. Laina is handful enough."

"I know but I missed the first 6 years of her life. I guess I just wanted to see what it felt like to you know, hold a baby and change diapers and stuff." Layne said sadly. "Sorry, I won't bring it up again."

Shannon sighed and smiled.

"Baby, your in fuckin' rehab, we have a while to go before you get out. Let's just take things slow. We don't have to rush anything. Maybe in the future, but not right now okay. We haven't even spent time with each other yet and you're talking about having more babies. Slow down Layne."

"You're right. Sorry." Layne said softly. "I wish I had a picture of us. A recent picture. Make sure you bring a camera so you can take one. I miss seeing your eyes. I wish I could go through this with you here with me. Sometimes this gets lonely. I'm sorry I'm so needy..." Layne rambled.

"No, I get it Layne. It's okay, I'm here for you. We'll see each other in a few more weeks." Shannon smiled.

"You, you guys, you're my fucking life. Shannon you're the only human outside of this place I trust. I fucking live for you." Layne said desperately.

"I know Layne, I know. I care about you so much. I just can't wait for our family to be reunited. We're gonna be so happy and perfect..." Shannon smiled.

Layne started sobbing on the other end again.

"Layne?" Shannon asked.

"My time limit's almost up. I can only make one 30 minute phone call a week."

Shannon felt sad now too. He didn't want the call to end.

"Baby. It'll be alright." Shannon sighed.

"It was so good to hear your voice today Shannon. Tell me you love me. It makes things easier here." Layne sniffled.

"I love you Layne. I fucking love you." Shannon pouted.

"I love you too Shanny. Tell Laina I love her and I'm thinking about her." Layne sniffled.

"Will do." Shannon smiled.

"I gotta get off of this phone now. I'll call you next week over the weekend." Layne replied.

"I'll be by the phone all day." Shannon sighed.

"Bye Shannon."

"Bye." Shannon's voice cracked.

The phone clicked and his cell phone cut off. Shannon still held the phone to his ear for a few minutes before slowly closing his phone and pushing the antenna back in.

His mind was gone for the rest of the day. He sat there and dropped his phone on the couch and put his face to his hands.

It was like a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders to know that Layne was doing good. Layne sounded good, his voice sounded clear. Shannon smiled through the tears. He bet Layne was smiling hard with his new teeth in his mouth. He couldn't believe he had just gotten a phonecall from Layne.

Shannon wanted to see Layne just as bad as Layne wanted to see him.

Shannon got his cry out and felt better. He composed himself and finally came back out into the studio. He tried to put on a smile but it was hard after what he had just went through. The people around him had no idea how he was hurting for Layne.

He had to keep telling himself that everything was going to be alright when Layne got out. Everything was gonna be absolutely perfect.

It was getting harder and harder for Shannon to stay strong when the one thing he wanted the most was so close, yet so far.


	6. 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shannon smiled and leaned in, pressing a kiss to Layne's lips. Layne nearly shuddered. "Let's go back to my room before we start doing all that Shannon." Layne smirked and blushed.

Layne stared in the mirror that was hanging on the wall in the small bathroom that was joined to his room. He opened his mouth, looking at his gums. He had over half of the teeth removed from his mouth which had been due to decay, which was the result of his frequent drug use. He was surprised he had any teeth left at all. He had three teeth left on the bottom of his mouth and 5 left at the top of his mouth. It felt weird without his partial in. He could feel his teeth hitting his gums. He looked down and opened the pink cup, sliding the top ones in,then sliding the bottom ones in.

He smiled to himself in the mirror. They fit perfectly around his remaining teeth. He sighed and ran his hand through his short hair. He had shaved his head when he first arrived to rehab, and it had grown back a bit over the past months. His hair was turning gray already and he was only 33 years old. Perhaps that was due to the long term drug use as well. Layne had age around his eyes. He rubbed the skin on his face as he stared at himself.

He couldn't wait to get out of here so he could dye his hair. He sighed and slipped his flip flops on. He was wearing a white tank top and white pajama like pants that tied up at the waist. These were the uniforms they had to wear at the rehab center. He walked out of the bathroom and stopped to stare at the crinkled picture he kept on there.

It was the picture that his daughter Laina had given him when he was in the hospital. He couldn't wait to see her. He had spoken to her on the phone several times when he was allowed to make his weekly phone call. She was reading now and she loved to read things to him. He had even sent her a letter and she read it to him over the phone. He was so proud of her.

Layne started tidying up his room. It was part of their routine there. They had to make sure their rooms were clean at all times. Layne was pretty good at doing that. He always followed all of the rules. He laid pretty low.

Layne smiled to himself as he started throwing his dirty clothes in his clothes basket.

Tomorrow, here in this very room, Shannon would be here. Layne closed his eyes and smiled. He had waited and worked so hard for this and tomorrow he would get his reward for doing good.

He left his room with his clothes basket and washing materials. He kept his head down as he walked through the halls, passing people, muttering hey.

He followed his usual routine of washing his clothes, taking them back to the room. He then went to the dining hall to grab a bite to eat. A vegan delight as they all liked to call it. After that was yoga and meditation. Layne had gotten very good at yoga. He loved meditating, it was so relaxing.

He had a meeting with his sponsor after that where he expressed his feelings. As usual they were about Shannon.

Shannon was the only thing keeping him going right about then.

After the sponsor meeting, Layne sat in on a meeting where people spoke about their problems with drugs. Layne never spoke up but was there as a support to other people.

Finally he was back in his room to do whatever he liked for the rest of the day. He got out his journal and started writing in it.

 

I'm yearning with anticipation for tommorrow's visit. It will be the first time I've seen Shanny in 8 months. I can't wait to reconnect with him. It's still so weird to me how we got to this point. How can two people be so in love and not fucked? I've never gone about this in this way before. I can't believe he fucking loves me. I can't believe I'm finally going to be able to touch him tomorrow. I need it so bad. I'm pining for him.

I wish we could get married right now, at this very moment. I worry I sound too obsessive. Maybe its just being trapped behind these white walls for too long and not being able to see him. I have so much energy and I want to expend it on him.

I want to have another baby with him before we turn 40. I want to see Shannon's stomach swollen, I want to kiss it. I want to raise a baby with him. I want Laina to have a brother, who looks just like Shannon, with the same blue eyes and golden brown hair. Shannon will come around eventually!

 

Layne sighed and slumped back in his chair, enjoying his daydreams about the perfect life he could have with Shannon. He closed his journal and took out a plastic case full of beads. He had started making necklaces to pass the time by. He started working on one he had began making for Shannon. He absolutely could not wait to see his lover.

* * *

Layne's heart beat fast as he made his way through the halls of the rehab center. He was mere seconds away from seeing Shannon. He had been notified that his visitor was there. He honestly hadn't been to the front of the rehab center in months. He mostly stayed in his room when he wasn't busy there.

He turned the corner and was about to open the double doors but he stopped and looked out the glass on the door and into the lobby. He scanned the room and his eyes stopped and his breath caught in his throat.

There he was. Sitting on one of the couches, legs crossed, elbow on his thigh, hand holding his face up and he was looking to the side. He had on his burgundy shades, and his bag was sitting beside him. He tapped his foot nervously. Layne smiled to himself. Shannon looked so good.

A wave of nerves ran over Layne. He sighed and slowly opened the door, slowly making his way over and standing in front of Shannon, his hands in his pockets, a half smile on his face. He didn't say anything at first. He could feel his stomach turning as he stood there, looking down at Shannon.

Shannon slowly turned his head, looking up at Layne. Their eyes met and they stared at each other for a few seconds before Shannon jumped up.

"Layne...oh my god...." He said softly, wrapping his arms around Layne.

Layne could feel his eyes watering as he wrapped his arms around Shannon, burying his face in the man's neck. He took in Shannon's scent. He smelled like cologne. He felt Shannon start to shake under his embrace.

"Long time no see Shanny..." Layne said softly, kissing the side of Shannon's head.

Layne kept his arms wrapped around Shannon's body as Shannon stepped back to look at Layne, tears filling his eyes.

"You look so good baby. You've beat this thing. You look so fucking great." Shannon said, voice quivering as he put his hand on Layne's cheek and stroked it.

Layne smiled, putting his hand on Shannon's hand. He showed his teeth when he smiled.

Shannon smiled and leaned in, pressing a kiss to Layne's lips. Layne nearly shuddered.

"Let's go back to my room before we start doing all that Shannon." Layne smirked and blushed.

Shannon grabbed his bag and Layne wrapped his arm around Shannon's waist. They walked close together as they made their way to Layne's room.

"Wow this place has really changed over the years." Shannon said looking around as they made their way to Layne's room.

They conversed lightly on the way to Layne's room. Layne pulled away from Shannon so he could unlock his door. They went inside and Layne made sure to shut the door behind him and lock it back.

Shannon took his shades off and set them on Layne's desk and looked around.

"Well this is it, this is my little peice of home here." Layne smiled sitting on his bed and watching Shannon take in the surroundings.

Shannon had wandered off to Layne's night table, picking up the picture that Laina had drew for him when he was in the hospital.

"Aw oh my god Layne. I remember this." Shannon smiled warmly, looking down at it.

"I have more for you. Baby girl delievered." Shannon smiled. "She still draws you with the long hair though, she doesn't know what you look like now."

"That's okay. I love anything she creates for me. Come here Shannon, get more comfortable." Layne smiled, patting the spot beside him on the bed.

Shannon smiled and walked over, sitting down and removing his shoes and socks, wiggling his toes. Layne chuckled lightly.

"I remember when you loved being barefoot all the time..." He smirked.

"I still do love to be barefoot." Shannon smiled.

"I fucking wish I was going home." Layne sighed.

"Me too Layne. But we'll make the most of this weekend. You're so close to the end. You've pretty much already made it. You look so healthy baby. I can't believe how much you have changed since I first brought you here." Shannon smiled.

Layne looked down and smiled shyly. He got up, going over to his desk and opening the drawer, taking out the necklaces he had made.

"Babe I made this for you. I know it's not much, but I worked really hard on it...just for you." Layne smiled, handing the beaded necklace to Shannon.

"It's really cute. I love it!" Shannon smiled, putting it around his neck and looking at it.

He smiled as he looked at the designs of the beads. Black, red and golden yellow beads.

"This one's for Laina, will you give it to her?" Layne asked, handing Shannon a necklace made of pink and blue beads that had beads with letters on it that spelled her name.

"Yeah, yeah sure babe. These are so great. She's gonna love her necklace." Shannon smiled.

Layne slid closer to Shannon and put his arm around him.

"When I get out, I'll buy you a real necklace...14 k gold..." He smiled, kissing Shannon's cheek.

"Layne, I don't care about that, I'll just be happy that you're home." Shannon chuckled, looking over at Layne.

Layne smirked and pressed his lips to Shannon's. The two men kissed softly for a few seconds and then Shannon pulled away, face red. Layne pouted.

"You know Layne, I brought you something too." Shannon said softly, reaching over and getting his bag, opening it and fishing around inside.

Layne smiled as he watched Shannon. Shannon bit his lip as he pulled out a small red velvet box, dropping his bag to the floor.

"Oh Shannon, you didn't have to do this..." Layne began.

Shannon opened up the box, revealing a gold ring with a peridot stone in the middle of it.

"Yes I did, you're mine and I want everyone to know it. This is your birthstone color Layne. You still wanted to get married when you got out right?" Shannon asked, pouting slightly as he held the ring out to Layne.

"Fuck yes." Layne smiled, holding his hand out.

Shannon smiled and took the ring out of the box and slid it onto Layne's finger.

"Does it fit?" Shannon asked putting the box on the nightstand.

"Yeah it fits. It's beautiful, I love it. I'm supposed to do this for you though..." Layne smiled, his eyes tearing up.

He grabbed a fistfull of Shannon's shirt and pulled him to him, crashing his lips against Shannon's.

Shannon gasped as Layne slid his tongue into his mouth. Shannon wrapped his arms around Layne as they kissed passionately. The room was getting hot around them. Eventually, Shannon laid on the bed, and Layne lay beside Shannon, their lips reconnecting.

"I've been wanting to do this for so long!" Layne breathed as he kissed Shannon.

He pulled away and peeled his shirt off, throwing it to the floor.

"Did you bring the lube?" Layne asked, leaning down to kiss Shannon again.

"Yes. Of course I did." Shannon smiled shyly.

"You don't mind if we try right now do you?" Layne asked, biting his lip.

"It's whatever you want to do baby. I'm here for you." Shannon smiled staring up at Layne.

Layne smiled down at Shannon and slowly began pulling his shirt up over his stomach. Shannon sat up slightly and pulled his shirt off, throwing it to the ground. Layne ran his hands over Shannon's chest.

"Your skin feels so good Shannon..." Layne muttered.

Shannon shivered under Layne's soft touch, it had been a while since he had had another human being touch him.

Layne sat beside Shannon and lifted his hips as he slid his pants and underwear off. Shannon's breath caught in his throat as he saw Layne's member come into view. Layne looked down at Shannon and smiled warmly.

"Your turn." He smiled.

Shannon slowly sat up and started unbuttoning his pants. He slowly pulled them down, kicking them off the rest of the way. He put his hands over his lap and blushed.

"Shanny, I remember when you used to be up for anything. You were so wild back then. Why you so shy now?" Layne said softly, running his finger up and down Shannon's thigh.

"I haven't done this in a long time...I'm just nervous. I've been taking care of Laina for so long. I haven't really thought about myself in a while...' Shannon stared down.

Layne lifted Shannon's chin up to look at him. Shannon cast his eyes up to Layne's.

"Babe, Laina's taken care of, you're here with me, you've put this beautiful ring on my finger...it's time to start enjoying yourself. You deserve to feel good. I wanna make you feel good. Trust me..." Layne said softly, leaning in and kissing Shannon again.

Shannon shuddered under Layne's mouth. Layne sucked on Shannon's lower lip and then pulled away, smiling warmly at him.

"Take 'em off." He said softly tugging at Shannon's underwear.

Shannon was mesmerized by Layne. He felt like he had felt when he and Layne had first started dating. Shannon slowly slid them off, kicking the garment to the floor with the rest of his clothes, exposing himself to Layne. Layne stared down at Shannon's semi-hard member with a twinkle in his eyes.

"Shannon you've got so many tattoos now. Your so beautiful..." Layne mumbled again, sneaking his hand over Shannon's thigh and wrapping his hand around Shannon's length.

Shannon jumped and threw an arm over his face as Layne began to gently pump Shannon's cock.

"Baby you are so shy. Look at me do this to you. Please..." Layne begged.

Shannon sighed and slowly put his arm down, looking down at Layne's hand on his cock. Layne moved up and down with his hand, pressing on his urethral meatus. Shannon let out a shaky breath as Layne worked him.

"Feeling good?" Layne smiled.

Shannon looked at Layne and nodded slowly.

Shannon lay there, still unsure of himself even though Layne's actions were making him feel good. Layne suddenly stopped and straddled Shannon and began grinding his own erection into Shannon's.

Shannon looked up at Layne, his expression changing, his brows furrowing. He was shaking under Layne. This felt good to him.

"This feels good Shannon..." Layne sighed, closing his eyes as he grinded against Shannon.

"It does..." Shannon said softly, slowly putting his hands on Layne's hips.

"Don't stop..." Shannon said lightly, his eyes falling closed.

Shannon could feel his orgasm coming on. Each time Layne grinded, Layne's cock rubbed against Shannon's testicles, and Shannon's own member prodded Layne's thigh.

Layne smiled and looked down as Shannon's mouth formed an "O". He knew then that Shannon was there. Shannon arched his back, shaking violently, letting out harsh breaths. Layne could feel Shannon's cum coat his inner thighs. He stopped grinding against Shannon, still straddling him. Shannon's hands fell to his sides as he lay there, staring up at Layne, his chest moving up and down rapidly.

"I think that felt good." Layne smiled, leaning down and shoving his tongue into Shannon's mouth.

"Fuck yes...that felt so fucking good. I feel so fucking relaxed right now...I thought I was gonna have trouble...but it just happened. I fucking love you Layne." Shannon breathed.

"I love you too baby. It's my turn. I wanna cum. Don't you want to make me cum?" Layne pouted.

He missed this. Talking dirty to another human being. Talking dirty to Shannon. He felt like his old self again.

"Well, yes of course..." Shannon smiled, looking up at Layne.

Layne got off of Shannon and lay down on the bed, his erection sticking out, begging Shannon to touch it.

"What do you want me to do?" Shannon asked, shakily rolling over.

Layne didn't care that Shannon's cum was all over his legs.

"If I remember correctly, you used to give the best fucking blow jobs. Do you think you could suck me?" Layne requested.

Shannon smiled, resting on his elbow and looking at Layne.

"Well, I'm a bit rusty. But I can try. I can't believe I'm about to do this. This feels so fucking wrong. I'm a father." Shannon blushed.

"And daddy needs his playtime too." Layne smirked.

"You are such a dork." Shannon smirked, crawling over between Layne's spread legs.

Layne bit his lip and watched as Shannon opened his mouth, coming towards his cock. Layne moaned slightly as Shannon sucked his tip into his mouth, pressing his tongue against Layne's meatus.

"Copy cat!" Layne moaned.

Shannon had taken more of Layne into his mouth and laughed around his cock, sending vibrations through it.

"MMM Shanny, feels good!" Layne moaned.

He knew it wasn't gonna be long until he came. He had been waiting for this, jerking off for this. This was his moment.

It was suddenly as if something inside of Shannon snapped. Shannon started sucking Layne's cock fast. Layne gasped, arching his back.

"Oh baby, you remember!" He moaned, bucking his hips into Shannon's face.

Shannon started kneading Layne's testicles in his hands, moaning around Layne's length.

Layne's stomach felt like it was in knots as he felt himself getting close.

"Fuck Shannon, just like that, oh god yes!" Layne moaned lightly.

Layne ran his hands through Shannon's hair, his peridot ring shining in the light.

Layne cried out as he came inside Shannon's mouth. Shannon swallowed hard as he drank it all up. Layne watched through half lidded eyes, shocked.

Shannon pulled off of Layne's cock, his hair disheveled, cum around his mouth, his face red and he gasped for air.

"Fuck baby. What the hell?" Layne laughed lightly, rubbing his stomach lightly.

"I fucking love this. I just remembered how much I miss this. I need this Layne. I'm so horny. I wanna do more things. I haven't done this stuff in years." Shannon said desperately, wiping his mouth.

Layne looked up at his lover and smiled. "Well hold on, let me get it up again..." He chuckled, snaking his hand down to his own erection, and stroking himself.

Shannon was already rock hard as he jumped off the bed and ran to his bag, shakily fumbling around until he found the lube.

"What's the rush?" Layne smiled, still stroking himself as he watched Shannon opening the lube.

"I'm gonna fuck you." Shannon said.

Layne was shocked, not only at the fact that Shannon's perverted streak had finally been unleashed, but also the fact that Shannon seemed to be taking control.

"Say what?" Layne asked, stopping his stroking.

Shannon had coated his fingers with the lube and crawled back on the bed, getting between Layne's legs and staring into Layne's eyes as he reached his arm down and ran his fingers down Layne's crevice until he came to Layne's opening.

"I said, I'm gonna fuck you Layne." Shannon said as he shoved two fingers into Layne's ass.

Layne jumped and winced as Shannon began thrusting his fingers into him.

"Holy...fuck...Shanny..." Layne stammered.

Shannon pressed his lips to Layne's shoving his tongue in his mouth. They made out passionately for a few minutes as Shannon thrust his fingers inside of Layne.

"MMM. I want you to sit in my lap and fucking bounce!" Shannon requested, staring down at Layne with a carnal lust in his eyes.

"Yes sir." Layne smirked, biting his lip and pushing into Shannon's fingers slightly.

Layne couldn't believe Shannon was going to fuck him. This was going to be interesting.


	7. 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Layne sat there silently, reading the little letter from his daughter. That did it then. He put his hand to his face as the tears fell, sniffling.

Shannon pulled his fingers out of Layne, getting up and sitting on the edge of the bed. He grabbed the lube and opened it once again, pouring some in his hand and running it up and down his hardened cock.

"Layne." Shannon called.

Layne got up off of the bed and stood in front of Shannon. Shannon looked up at Layne, his dick in his hand.

"Turn around. Sit down." Shannon replied.

Layne turned around and shakily started squatting down.

"Oh..hold on..." Shannon mumbled.

Layne stayed squatted as Shannon slid back on the bed some. His legs hung off the bed. Layne sat down on Shannon's lap. Shannon barely had enough room to move his member against Layne's butt.

"Er...I don't think this is gonna work...I thought for sure..." Shannon mumbled as Layne squatted again.

Shannon spread his legs and laid back and Layne sat between his legs. Layne leaned forward, his stomach touching his thighs.

"Shanny this ain't gonna work either." Layne said biting his lip.

Someone would be in an awkward position if they tried it like this.

By now Shannon was embarrassed. He moved up against the headboard of the bed, his knees pulled to his chest, his face buried in his knees. Layne pouted and got up, rushing over to Shannon.

"Babe...hey c'mon, we can do this. Don't be like that." Layne said nuzzling his nose in Shannon's hair.

"I feel like a fucking idiot...I was trying to be in control and I can't even get it right..." Shannon wined.

Layne smiled. Shannon was still winey after all these years.

"Babe, it's no big deal. I want you to fuck me. C'mon, fuck me Shannon. Here, let me show you what to do." Layne said softly, kissing Shannon's temple.

Layne had more experience with this than Shannon. Layne got up and walked into the bathroom. He emerged with a towel and set it in the armchair that sat in the corner of the room. Shannon lay sprawled out on the bed, watching Layne.

"Babe come over here and sit in this chair like this." Layne instructed, sitting in the arm chair.

He pulled his knees to his chest, keeping his hands around his knees. Layne let one leg fall as he stroked himself a bit, getting himself up and he pulled his other knee to his chest again.

"See how my dick stands out? I'll just back it up on you, you just sit here." Layne smiled warmly, dropping his knees.

Shannon smiled and got up, going over to the chair. Layne got up and Shannon sat down, bringing his knees to his chest the way Layne showed him.

Layne fetched the lube and poured some in his hand, coming back over to Shannon and bending down and stroking Shannon's semi-hard cock.

"You ready?" Layne smiled, pulling off of Shannon's now full erect member.

Shannon smiled and nodded as he held his knees in place. Layne started to back up. Shannon quickly let go of one knee, stuffing his foot in the crack of the chair so he leg would stay up as he held his erection. Layne could feel it against his crack. Shannon bit his lip as he felt around for the Layne's opening. He finally found it and Layne pushed back slowly. Shannon kept his hand on his cock as his tip was forced into Layne's tight space.

"Let go baby let go!" Layne said breathlessly.

Shannon quickly let go of his cock as Layne slowly pushed back. Shannon took his foot out of the crack of the chair and held his other knee once again. Shannon slid forward slightly, his cock still inside Layne's ass.

Layne bent slightly, putting his hands on the fronts of his thighs as he began to slowly move against Shannon's cock.

Shannon had his eyes closed and his head threw back as Layne moved on his cock. This was something he had never experienced before. Layne's ass was tight and hot.

Layne started picking up the pace a little bit, his hands on his knees now, concentrating on the task at hand.

Shannon was shaking as Layne backed up on him.

"Layne..this feels fucking awesome...it's so tight..." Shannon moaned lightly.

He was so close to finishing already. Layne picked up the pace, his skin slapping against Shannon's as he fucked Shannon's cock. Layne was breathing hard as he thrusted.

"It's getting harder to hold my knees...I'm so close...I want to cum so bad...keep going!" Shannon wined, brows furrowed.

He writhed under Layne lightly.

"Don't move...still!" Layne breathed.

Shannon bit his lip and looked down to see his cock buried in Layne's ass, Layne moving against it.

Layne stopped moving for a moment because his thigh muscles were starting to burn from moving so much and then started up again and suddenly as he slammed back on Shannon's cock, he felt a lightning bolt of pleasure surge through his privates.

"Shannon!" Layne moaned a little too loudly, shakily backing up on Shannon.

He felt his whole body tremble with each thrust on Shannon.

Shannon shook violently under Layne, writhing in pleasure as he shot his warm cum inside of Layne's ass, gasping lightly. He dropped his knees after he was finished.

Layne wined when he felt Shannon's cock becoming flaccid inside of him. Layne quickly pulled off and turned around, standing in front of a post orgasm Shannon who was laid back in the chair, legs spread, arms on both arms of the chair, looking up at Layne with a tired seductive look on his face.

Layne reached his hand down and began stroking himself, staring straight into Shannon's eyes. Shannon looked up at Layne and licked his lips, moving one of his hands lazily to his face and smiling up at Layne.

Layne couldn't keep his eyes open any longer as he climaxed, shooting his load on Shannon's stomach and privates.

Layne backed up onto the bed and fell back onto it, staring up at the ceiling, his long legs hanging off the edge of the bed. Shannon shakily got up and laid on the bed, a content smile on his face. Once Shannon was on the bed, Layne slid back to be face to face with Shannon.

"That was so fucking good. You fucking hit my prostate Shanny. I wish you would have lasted a little longer so I could have came while you were inside of me."

"Sorry..." Shannon blushed.

The two men were still trying to catch their breathes after their sex romp.

"I could just lay here all day and do nothing but have sex with you..." Shannon smiled tiredly.

Layne ran his hand through Shannon's short hair as they lay there.

"Me too. This was everything I had hoped for. I love you so much Shannon. Thank you." Layne smiled.

He leaned over and kissed the tired man's lips.

"You wanna take a nap?" Layne smiled.

Shannon was fighting sleep.

"MMM HMM." Shannon said softly.

Layne threw an arm around his lover and held him as he fell asleep. Eventually Layne drifted off as well.

* * *

Later in the day, after the boys woke up from their nap and tidied the room up a bit and cleaned up, they were laid back on the bed, side by side. Shannon had taken out the folder of pictures that Laina had drew for Layne.

Layne smiled as he held the folder. Shannon smiled, putting his arm around Layne's lower back and resting his chin on Layne's shoulder as he watched Layne look at it.

The folder was pink and Laina had written "Daddy" on it with marker. She had crayola stamp markers and had stamped various designs all over it. There were also heart stickers all over it.

"Did she do this all by herself?" Layne asked, running his fingers over the stickers.

"Yep. She picked out all the colors and stickers and everything." Shannon smiled.

Layne smiled warmly as he opened the folder. He gasped as he saw two pictures at the front of the folder.

"Some pictures of us for you." Shannon smiled warmly.

Layne felt a tightness in his chest as he set the folder down, picking the pictures up. The first picture was of Laina and Shannon. Shannon was holding Laina and had a big smile on his face. Laina had her arms wrapped around Shannon's neck, her temple pressed to Shannon's as she smiled wide.

"You guys are so cute. I love it. Thanks so much Shannon." Layne smiled.

He took the other picture and put it in front.

"Awww she's so friggen cute." Layne smiled as he stared at the picture of his daughter.

It was her school picture. She had her hair pulled back, her little fist balled up and under her chin as she smiled at the camera.

"I miss her." Layne sighed, holding the pictures to his chest.

"She's growing everyday. You're gonna be surprised at how much she's grown since the last time you saw her!" Shannon smiled, kissing Layne's cheek.

Layne smiled as he gently set the pictures back in the folder. He gently pulled out the drawings that Laina had drawed.

"She made that at school for you." Shannon said softly, pointing to a crinkled paper that had a red handprint on it.

Laina had written "Daddy Layne" on it. Layne could feel his eyes tear up as he put his hand over her handprint. Her hand was so small. He put it to the back and looked at the next picture.

It was a picture of him with the long hair. She had written "I love you daddy" on it.

Layne could feel a lump forming in his throat. He ran his hand down the drawing of himself.

"She's so creative...like me..." Layne said, voice quivering.

Shannon smiled and rubbed Layne's lower back, kissing his cheek again.

Layne looked at the next picture. He immediately laughed to himself.

"Aww Shanny, she drew Violet. That's so fucking sweet. She even wrote his name...she's something." Layne cooed.

Laina had drawn a picture of her favorite stuffed animal, Violet. She had even written the bear's name on the picture.

"She fucking loves that little thing Layne. She never goes anywhere without it." Shannon smiled.

"I just bought it on impulse at the airport that day I came to see her. I didn't even choose anything special, I just grabbed one." Layne smiled, hugging the folder to his chest.

He finally looked at the last piece of paper. Shannon smiled warmly as he watched Layne look at it. Layne gasped when he saw it was a letter from Laina, in her handwriting.

"She loves to write, now that she knows how. She's so smart Layne." Shannon smiled softly.

Layne sat there silently, reading the little letter from his daughter. That did it then. He put his hand to his face as the tears fell, sniffling. Shannon wrapped his arms around Layne and held him tight.

_  
Dear Daddy,_

_I miss you so much. I wish you was here with me. When can you come home? I hope you get better! I hate you being sick! I love you so much daddy! Okay bye bye!_

_Love,_

_Laina  
_

"Did you tell her what to write?" Layne asked, wiping his tears.

"No...I swear to you I didn't. She came up to me and gave this to me." Shannon smiled.

"She's something, that little girl. I just wanna go home and be with you guys." Layne sobbed.

"Sssh. I know Layne, I know. Everything's gonna be okay." Shannon pouted, holding Layne tight.

"Maybe you could go talk to the head honcho around here...get me out early..." Layne said desperately.

Shannon sighed.

"Babe, you need to finish this. You've already practically beat the habit. Look at you, you look so healthy. Just be patient, you will be out of here soon. Don't rush things Layne." Shannon said softly.

Layne looked down at the note for a few minutes. He put everything back in the folder and set it on his nightstand. He faced Shannon.

"Can we call her? Can you call her Shannon?" Layne pouted looking into Shannon's eyes.

"Layne...what time is it?" Shannon said, looking over at the clock that hang on Layne's wall.

"Layne it's pretty late...she might be asleep." Shannon sighed.

"Please Shannon...please I wanna hear her voice. Please can you just try to get her on the phone?" Layne was at tears.

It broke Shannon's heart.

"Okay. I can try." Shannon said reaching in his pocket and taking out his cell phone.

"Thanks baby." Layne smiled, leaning over and pressing a kiss to Shannon's lips.

Shannon dialed his mom's number. It was around 8 o'clock at night. It rang and rang and finally Mama Nel answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Mom?" Shannon asked.

"Shannon? Hey honey, is everything alright?" She asked, concerned.

"Yeah mom. Everything's great." Shannon smiled.

"Are you there with Layne?" She asked.

"Yeah." Shannon smiled.

"How is he?" Nel asked.

"Mom he's doing so good. Listen, Laina isn't asleep yet is she? Layne wants to speak to her." Shannon asked.

"No, she's right here watching tv." Nel smiled.

Shannon looked at Layne and held a thumb up. Layne smiled warmly.

Shannon listened as Nel spoke to his daughter.

"Laina sweetie, you have a phone call." She smiled.

"A phonecall? For me!?" Laina exclaimed.

Shannon chuckled as he heard shuffling around on their end. Laina's little voice sounded through the receiever.

"Who this? Hello!" She said loudly into the phone.

"Honey, it's daddy Shannon." Shannon smiled.

"Daddy! Hiii!" She smiled.

"Are you having fun over there at gramma's?" Shannon smiled.

Layne leaned in close to Shannon, trying to hear his daughter's voice. Once Shannon asked Laina was she having fun, Laina went off into a whole conversation. She loved to talk. She started telling Shannon about every aspect of her stay with Nel so far. Shannon listened and acknowledged he was listening to her every now and then. 30 minutes later, she got silent.

"Honey. Honey that's great. Listen, someone wants to speak to you." Shannon said in a sing song voice.

"Who!" Laina asked.

"Here he is, find out honey." Shannon smiled handing Layne the phone.

Layne's heart felt warm as he smiled into the phone.

"Hi honey, do you know who I am?" Layne asked.

There was a slight pause and then Laina screamed into the phone. "DAAAADDDDY!!!"

Layne flinched and held the phone away from his ear for a second. Shannon put his hand over his mouth and chuckled.

"Daddy! Daddy what are you doing!?" Laina asked excitedly.

"Nothing much, I'm just sitting here with daddy Shannon. I saw your drawings." Layne smiled.

"You did!?" Laina exclaimed.

"Yeah huh. Their so good. You've got talent baby. I want you to keep drawing for me. Can you do that?" Layne asked.

"Yes! I love you daddy! I miss you!" Laina exclaimed.

Layne's voice was quivering.

"I love you and I miss you too baby, so much. You're very pretty. How's school going? What are you learning?" Layne asked.

This set Laina off into another big converstion. Layne listened and smiled as Laina began explaining to him everything she was learning. He was so intrigued by his daughter. She was so excited about everything.

Shannon watched as Layne talked to his daughter. Layne was so happy. It filled Shannon's heart with joy. He couldn't wait for Layne to get out of this place either.

Layne gave the phone back to Shannon after he finished conversing with Laina. Shannon instructed Laina to give the phone to Nel. Layne sat there looking at his gifts from Laina again as Shannon briefly conversed with his mother. Once Shannon hung up his phone and slid it back in his pocket, Layne put the folder back on the nightstand and faced Shannon.

Shannon smiled as Layne leaned in and pressed his lips to his.

"I fucking love my family. You guys mean everything to me. I'm a new person, I'm not who I was before. I'm never going back to that..." Layne muttered against Shannon's mouth.

Shannon sighed and smiled. The two stared at each other for a moment.

"You hungry? Let's go grab a bite." Layne smiled.

"Okay. Sure." Shannon said softly.

* * *

It had been decided that it wasn't a good idea to bring Laina inside of the rehab building. Layne would just have to wait to see her when he got out. Shannon didn't really feel safe with her there, because she was a very curious and wandering child. He didn't want her wandering off while they were sleeping and getting into something she wasn't suppose to be into.

Layne kept up with calling her. Shannon would come to stay every weekend with him.

Every weekend Shannon ended up fucking Layne. Layne didn't know how it got to that point. He liked in control Shannon. It felt good to be taken care of. Shannon had became very good at it too, hitting his "P" spot almost every time. Shannon had been doing his research too. He had Layne all over the room in various positions, pleasuring his lover.

Both men were relaxed and care free now that they had started getting some again.

Shannon's mom had noticed the change in Shannon. Shannon was always smiling. He couldn't stop. Sometimes his cheeks hurt.

They were so close to their family being reunited. Shannon couldn't wait.


	8. 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Layne, what's going through your mind?" Shannon asked, pressing his face against Layne's cheek. "I don't know. Shock. Surprise." Layne mumbled.

Shannon sat in the lobby area of the rehab facility. He couldn't wipe the smile off of his face as he sat there waiting for Layne to come get him. He was really looking forward to seeing Layne this weekend. Layne only had one more month in rehab and then he was going to be released.

Shannon pulled on his beige hat, turning the rim down. He felt jittery. He fixed the rim and wrapped his arms around himself as he fervently tapped his heels as he waited for Layne. Shannon suddenly heard a door open and he looked up. He couldn't help but smile big when he looked up and saw Layne.

Shannon quickly stood up and grabbed his bag, meeting Layne halfway across the room. His smile faded slightly when he saw his man.

"Babe...did you just wake up?" Shannon asked, brows slightly furrowed, still smiling.

He wrapped his arms around Layne. Layne's hair was disheveled. His jaw seemed to be slightly higher then usual. Shannon realized Layne didn't have his teeth in his mouth.

Layne hugged Shannon, resting his head on Shannon's shoulder.

"I'm sick Shanny..." Layne wisped.

His accent sounded weird, since he couldn't form certain sounds since he only had a few teeth in his mouth.

"Aw...sick? Baby...let's go back to your room. I'll take care of you while I'm here." Shannon cooed, keeping his arm wrapped around Layne's waist as they began to make their way to Layne's room.

This was the first time that Shannon had ever seen Layne like this...unkept, stripped down, bare.

Layne didn't really care what he was looking like at the moment, he just knew that he felt like complete shit.

They finally made it back to Layne's room. It was a mess. Clothes lay everywhere, empty water bottles everywhere. Layne pulled away from Shannon and laid on his bed, pulling the covers over himself and laying on his back, looking at Shannon.

"Baby, how long have you been sick?" Shannon asked, starting to pick up clothes and put them in Layne's dirty clothes basket.

Shannon started tidying up as Layne lay there.

"All week. I don't know what's wrong with me. It must have been something I ate. I'm so glad you're here. You make me feel better." Layne wisped, smiling.

It was a pained smile. He was so nauseous.

"Baby have you gone down to the infirmary?" Shannon asked, sitting down on the bed beside Layne.

"No." Layne pouted.

"Babe..." Shannon pouted.

Shannon took his hat off and set it on the nightstand. He kicked his shoes off and got under the covers with Layne and wrapped his arm around him.

"I can't even wear my partials because I've been puking so much, I don't wanna ruin them..." Layne wined, turning his head.

"You've been puking?" Shannon asked, rubbing Layne's forehead.

Layne pouted and nodded up at Shannon.

"I feel nauseous right now. My stomach feels funny."

"Honey, maybe you need to go down to the infirmary." Shannon said, leaning down and kissing Layne's forehead.

"Not right now." Layne said. "Just hold me, it makes me feel better for now."

Shannon sighed and moved up slightly. Layne laid his head in Shannon's lap. Shannon gently ran his hand through Layne's hair. He put his hand on Layne's forehead to see if he had a temperature. He wasn't too hot.

Layne was still so hardheaded. He was the same way when they were going out in the early 90s. Layne would wait until he was hurting until he went to see a doctor.

Shannon hummed to himself, rubbing Layne's forehead softly.

"I love you." Shannon smiled looking down at his poor baby.

Layne smiled a little and then his expression changed. He jumped up out of bed, almost stumbling as he ran towards the bathroom. Shannon winced when he heard Layne groan and throw up in the toilet.

Shannon got up and walked to the door of the bathroom. Layne lay on the floor, hunched over the toilet. He had started crying by now.

"What the fuck's wrong with me? I feel like shit. How is this possible? I've done everything right. Why is this happening when we're so close to being together?" Layne cried into the toilet.

Shannon's heart was breaking. He walked over and kneeled down beside Layne. He wrinkled his nose at the puke smell and flushed the toilet.

"Babe, let's go to the infirmary. They can give you something to make you feel better."

"I don't wanna go. What if I have cancer or something? I don't want to know!" Layne cried hysterically.

Shannon furrowed his brows. Layne was overreacting. He had never seen Layne act this way before.

"Baby you do not have fucking cancer. Stop saying that." Shannon couldn't help but chuckle slightly.

"C'mon, stand up and let's go." Shannon smiled warmly.

Layne shakily stood up, wiping his mouth. Shannon just happened to cast his eyes down to Layne's stomach. Shannon continued to watch it as Layne walked past him over to the sink, putting mouthwash in his mouth and swishing, looking in the mirror.

Shannon looked at Layne's stomach as he stood sideways looking in the mirror. Layne was a very skinny guy, so why was his stomach slightly round?

"Baby come here for a sec." Shannon replied.

Layne walked over to Shannon and stood in front of him, slumped over. Shannon ran his hand down Layne's chest and to his stomach. He felt on Layne's stomach.

"Uh, what you doing that for?" Layne asked, sniffling.

Shannon could feel his heart rate speed up as he felt on Layne's stomach. Layne's stomach felt hard around the belly button.

Shannon would never forget how his stomach felt when he was pregnant. He stood there thinking.

Layne was sick. His stomach was hard, it was round. He was freaking out.

Shannon looked into Layne's eyes, a smile creeping on his face.

"What is it?" Layne asked, slightly annoyed.

"Layne. Baby....baby!" Shannon couldn't get the words out.

He pulled Layne into a tight hug. Layne groaned.

"Careful Shannon, what are you trying to say?" Layne wisped.

Shannon started becoming giddy. He pulled away and looked at Layne, bouncing up and down on his heels.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were with child!" Shannon exclaimed, putting his hand on Layne's stomach.

"Your tummy's hard. Haven't you noticed Layne?" Shannon smiled.

Layne looked down at his stomach and put his hand on it, pressing on it slightly.

He looked up at Shannon.

"Layne, you've gotta be pregnant! I just know it. Oh god, this is fucking wonderful if you are! We need to go down to that infirmary so they can give you a pregnancy test! C'mon!" Shannon said excitedly.

Layne put his hand on his stomach, putting his other hand to his mouth, in disbelief. He had never thought about that.

"C'mon Layne, go get dressed!" Shannon said excitedly going out of the bathroom.

Layne looked at himself in the mirror. Pregnant? Him? No fucking way.

* * *

Shannon cried tears of joy as they sat in the doctor's office. He wrapped his arms around Layne, burying his face in his neck. Layne sat there shocked as he looked at the black and white ultrasound photo.

Things had changed drastically since Shannon had first had Laina. Male pregnancies had become more acceptable to society.

Two months. Two fucking months.

Layne's body was strong. He had fucked it up using drugs for years, and apparently healed it back with the whole foods diet because according to the doctor at the rehab clinic, he was carrying a child. Or perhaps it was really some sort of a miracle. Layne had no idea he could even get pregnant. He never knew. He and Shannon were from a different generation. The doctor had explained to them that there was a test out now that men could get to determine whether they had the special gene that gave them the ability to get pregnant. It had only been developed a few years earlier and was costly.

Shannon kissed Layne's cheek and looked at the black and white picture.

"Layne, what's going through your mind?" Shannon asked, pressing his face against Layne's cheek.

"I don't know. Shock. Surprise." Layne mumbled.

Layne had just been writing in his journal about this. He never imagined in his wildest dreams that he would be the one carrying the child. He wanted Shannon to be pregnant. This all was too weird for him. He was losing control. Shannon was taking care of him.

The doctor suddenly came back in with two bottles of pills. Layne was in a daze as the doctor explained that one bottle was prenatal vitamins and that the other was for the morning sickness.

Before Layne knew it, they were out of there and back in his room. He lay on the bed, Shannon in his lap, kissing his stomach.

Layne looked down and smiled at Shannon. It was only starting to hit him. He was pregnant, with Shannon's baby. That was okay, there was nothing wrong with that. Baby number 2 for them. Laina was going to have a sibling.

"Layne this is fucking great news...I didn't think I was ready for another one but...we didn't even know you could get pregnant! Funny how things work out. I'm so fucking happy right now." Shannon smiled kissing Layne's stomach.

Layne finally spoke up.

"I want a boy. I want a boy who looks just like you Shannon. I want him to have your nose, your ears, your smile." Layne smiled, rubbing his stomach.

"Aw baby..." Shannon smiled, sitting up and kissing Layne.

"This was a total fucking shock Layne. I can't believe how fast things have moved over the past 11 months. I'm so in love with you..." Shannon smiled.

Layne smiled and kissed Shannon.

"Babe I'm gonna see if we can get you out of here, if we can get you home. You're fucking cured...your fucking pregnant. You need to be home with me and Laina. I need to take care of you, you're having my baby!" Shannon said proudly.

Layne became excited when Shannon mentioned getting him out of there.

"I wanna go home!" Layne smiled.

"I'll see what I can do to get you out early. It's not like you have 6 more months!"

Layne smiled and hugged Shannon and rubbed his stomach.

He still couldn't believe he was carrying a child. The universe worked in mysterious ways.

* * *

The day had finally arrived. Shannon had succeeded in his mission to get his lover out of rehab early. They could not really deny the request, Layne was doing so well, Layne never did anything wrong, and his health records were superior.

Shannon stayed in a hotel the night before he was to pick Layne up. It seemed like time had slowed down since he and Layne would be reunited. It had been a long and hard road for the two. Shannon thought about his life before Layne had came back into it. He had been so lonely, even though he had Laina. He had never really thought about it before.

He was a very lonely person. He had no one to really talk to. He had forgotten how good it had felt to be with another adult. He didn't think he would ever fall in love again after he had Laina. He thought about how lucky he was to have Layne back in his life. Layne was the only guy he had really wanted from the start anyway.

His family would finally be complete. Family. Shannon smiled at that thought.

The sun shined bright the morning that Shannon went to pick Layne up. Shannon arrived exactly on time to pick Layne up. He was damn near shaking as he parked his car and got out. He jogged across the parking lot, holding his jeans. He opened the doors and ran inside, slightly out of breath as he looked around.

Layne had saw Shannon come in. He jumped up and practically ran over to him. The two met and embraced each other. Shannon held the sides of Layne's face and placed kisses all over his face.

"I'm so fucking proud of you." Shannon almost whispered, looking into Layne's eyes.

"Thank you Shannon. Thank you so much for saving me." Layne smiled softly, keeping his arms wrapped around Shannon.

Shannon smiled and rubbed Layne's stomach.

"You ready to get out of here and go home?" Shannon smiled.

"Um, fuck yeah!" Layne said excitedly.

Layne carried a box with his journals and the jewelry he had made in it. Shannon kept his arm wrapped around Layne. Layne had already said his goodbyes to the people who meant something to him at the rehab. When it was time to go, he just wanted to go. He was tired of being there. He was ready to start the rest of his life with Shannon.

They walked out of the rehab clinic, never looking back. Shannon held Layne's hand with one hand and steered the wheel with the other as they drove off.

* * *

On the drive home, Shannon was excited to let Layne hear some of the albums he produced. He fumbled with the stereo and drove at the same time.

"Layne you're gonna love this. This is Chris and Brad's new band, Unified Theory. Their fucking awesome. I hope they can find some success. Listen to the lead singer's voice. Chris Shinn is his name."

Layne smirked as Shannon turned the stereo on and the first song started. Layne smiled looking straight ahead getting ready to listen to the first track but Shannon quickly changed his mind, turning the tracks.

"Shanny, let's just fucking listen to the whole thing! I can't believe you still do that, after all these years!" Layne chuckled.

"You have to hear this track A.M. Radio!" Shannon exclaimed.

He turned the volume up loud as the song started, putting both hands back on the wheel and started singing the song with Chris Shinn. Layne smirked and listened. He smiled to himself as Shannon sang the song.

"I like it." Layne smiled.

Shannon smiled and took one hand off of the wheel, putting his hand in Layne's.

They listened to the rest of the album and then Shannon turned the radio off.

"What'd you do that for?" Layne pouted.

He wanted to keep listening to music, sweet sweet music. He missed it.

"Layne, I should go ahead and tell you something now." Shannon sighed.

Layne furrowed a brow and looked over at Shannon as Shannon was driving.

Shannon glanced over at Layne then back at the road.

"Baby don't look so shocked, it's nothing bad. It's just well, you haven't really said anything about your family in a while...I'm not really sure what's going on there...but when I went to get your stuff out of your condo those months ago, your mother and your sister kind of walked in on me and Chris and Brad. They weren't too happy..." Shannon began.

"Oh yeah?" Layne asked, his face falling.

He looked out the window.

"Yeah. They were fixing to call the police on us. I had to convince them to sit down and calm down and I sort of told them about you. I mean, I didn't give too much away. I told them that you need time, ya know? They were so worried about you. Your mom was crying and everything." Shannon replied.

"Shannon why are you telling me this right now? I don't feel like dealing with that right now. I don't even wanna think about Seattle at all. I don't want to think about anyone there...I just wanna focus on us. Me you and the kids." Layne replied looking out the window.

"But baby, she's your mother. Please don't be mad, but I kinda sort of have been talking to her every month over the phone..."

Layne looked at Shannon with a furrowed brow.

"What?" He frowned.

"I won't tell her where we're at. I always call with a blocked call. I'm very discreet about that. She's so worried about you Layne. I told her about Laina. I sent her a few pictures of Laina as well. But don't worry, I didn't put a return address on the envelope. She probably knows we're in Indiana by the post mark, but I'm sure she doesn't know exactly where Layne. I just think you should get around to calling her eventually. She wants to meet her granddaughter, she wants to see you."

Shannon sighed.

"There's no rush baby. You take all the time you need though. No one's rushing you into doing anything."

Layne smiled a little.

"I just want to spend time with you guys right now. I'm not ready to face them just yet. But thanks for keeping my mom informed about me. Shannon you are so awesome." Layne smiled holding his hand out.

Shannon smiled and held it again.

"I can't wait until you really start showing Layne. You're gonna be so cute!" Shannon smiled.

Layne smirked and blushed. "I'm gonna look so weird, I'm not gonna want anyone to see."

"Aw poor baby. You'll be sexy to me!" Shannon smiled.

Layne squeezed Shannon's hand and smiled as he looked out of the window. Shannon dropped his hand to put more music on then grabbed it again.

Before they knew it, they had arrived back to LaFayette.

* * *

"Mom! Laina!" Shannon called happily as he and Layne entered the house.

Layne put his box down by the door and took his coat off, putting it on top of the box. Shannon smiled as Laina came running in there.

"DADDY!" She screamed running towards Shannon.

Shannon picked her up and hugged her. "Baby look, do you remember who that is!?"

Layne smiled at Laina. He felt like he was going to cry. Laina was getting so tall. She was definitely taller than the last time he saw her. Her eyes were so bright. She wore the necklace that Layne had made her in rehab. She looked at Layne and started rubbing her eye, crying.

"Daddy Layne..." She sniffled holding her arms out to him.

Layne could feel his own tears as he reached out and took his daughter from Shannon. Shannon's mother had walked in by now, watching the scene unfold. Shannon hugged his mom.

"Sssh, I'm home now Laina. I'm not going anywhere. I'm not sick anymore. We can be together forever now. I love you." Layne whispered in the little girl's ear.

Laina had her arms wrapped around Layne's neck, crying into his shoulder.

"I missed you daddy. I love you too!" She sniffled, kissing his cheek.

Layne smiled at her, showing all of his teeth.

"Give me a kiss." He smiled, puckering his lips at her.

She smiled, her finger in her mouth. She leaned forward and kissed her father.

Layne placed kisses all over his daughter's face. He set her down and she stayed by his side, hugging his legs. Layne looked up to see Shannon's mother. He felt shy as he looked down, running his hands through Laina's hair.

"Hi..." He said softly.

"Hi Layne, it's nice to finally meet you. Shannon has told me so much about you." She smiled.

Shannon pulled Laina off of Layne, despite her cries as Layne walked over to Shannon's mother and hugged her.

"You've made Shannon so happy." She whispered in Layne's ear.

Layne smiled and looked down. "Well he's made me very happy too. He saved my life and for that, I'm forever grateful."

"Laina, do you have anything for daddy? Why don't you go get daddy's present?" Shannon replied to the little girl.

"Okay!" Laina sniffled, running out of the room.

Once she was gone, Shannon rushed over beside Layne and wrapped his arm around him.

"Mom, we're not ready to tell Laina yet, but Layne's pregnant!" Shannon whispered loudly.

Layne looked down as Shannon pulled his shirt up slightly, rubbing his rounding belly. Mama Hoon's eyes widened.

"Are you two serious?" She gasped.

Layne looked up at her and nodded. Shannon dropped Layne's shirt and kissed Layne's cheek.

"That is so wonderful! I'm so happy for you two!" She exclaimed, giving each man a hug and a kiss to their cheek.

Layne held onto Shannon as Laina came back with Layne's gift, dragging it down the hall. Shannon chuckled, rushing over and trying to help her carry it.

"I can do it by myself daddy!" Laina exclaimed.

Shannon backed off. Layne smiled wide as Laina dragged the guitar case over to Layne. It was so obvious it was a guitar. Layne pretended like he was surprised.

They all went over to the couch, Layne carrying the guitar case.

"What's this?" He asked, putting it in his lap.

It laid across he and Shannon's lap. Laina was excited.

"Open it daddy!"

Layne opened the latches and opened the case, he smiled to himself as he stared at the guitar.

"It's a Fender Stratocaster Layne. I figured you would wanna play some music again. I've got an amp for you upstairs." Shannon smiled.

Layne leaned over and kissed Shannon. "Babe, I love it and I do, I wanna get into music again. I have so much to say." Layne smiled.

He looked over at Laina.

"Hey do you want to start a band?" He smiled.

"YEAAAH!" She screamed.

Layne smiled at his daughter.

"What do you wanna play?" He asked.

"Guitar, like you daddy!" She smiled.

"Okay great, we'll start a band!" Layne smiled kissing his daughter.

He was rusty at playing guitar, but he would learn again. He smiled to himself.

* * *

Later in the day, Shannon's mom left, and it was just Layne, Shannon and Laina. Layne and Laina lay on the couch together watching tv as Shannon cleaned up a bit. He knew Layne must have been exhausted from the whole day. He was so glad Layne was finally home with them.

Shannon walked over to the couch to see Layne asleep, teeth not in his mouth, snoring lightly. Laina was curled up on his chest, her thumb in her mouth, sleeping as well. The tv still played cartoons.

Shannon watched his two favorite people in the world for a few minutes and smiled to himself before resuming his chores.


	9. 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Mom? Yeah, it's Shannon! Guess what, we just got out of the doctor's office. Yeah, uh huh, it's a! Yes...we are so happy, we wanted a

Layne sat on the couch and smiled at his daughter. Shannon kneeled down beside her and kissed her cheek.

"Laina, me and daddy have something to tell you honey." Shannon smiled.

"Am I getting another present?" She asked.

Layne smiled to himself. Lately had had been spoiling the child, regardless of what Shannon said.

"Sort of..." Shannon smiled softly, running his hand through her curly hair.

"Honey, I got a baby inside of my stomach." Layne said softly, slowly pulling his shirt up.

Each week his stomach got rounder and rounder. His belly button was disappearing. Layne wore over sized shirts to hide his "gut". Laina stared at Layne's stomach and looked at Shannon. Shannon smiled.

"Daddy you having a baby?" She asked, walking between Layne's legs and looking at his stomach.

She put her hands on it.

"Yeah honey." Layne chuckled.

"Is it a boy or a girl?" She asked.

"Well we don't know yet Laina, we won't know for another month." Shannon said softly.

"Are you happy?" Layne smiled down at his daughter.

Laina smiled and nodded. She put her ear to Layne's stomach and then kissed it.

"I'm gonna be a big sister!" She smiled looking at her fathers.

They looked at each other and smiled.

* * *

Later that night, after Laina had fallen asleep, Layne and Shannon were in their bedroom, the door closed. Layne locked the door.

"I don't think you should do that Layne." Shannon replied.

"Why? We don't want Laina walking in on us or something." Layne replied.

"Just don't forget to unlock it back. It really freaks her out when I lock the door." Shannon replied.

"She's asleep. She will be alright." Layne replied, rubbing his stomach as he came over to the bed beside Shannon.

Faint music play from the stereo. Shannon was in his underwear, as was Layne. Shannon couldn't remember the last time he had slept almost nude. It had been years. If it wasn't for Laina being in the house, Layne would have slept naked.

Shannon put an arm around Layne. He smiled as he leaned in, pressing his lips to Layne's. Layne sighed as they kissed. Layne pulled away from Shannon's soft lips and attached his lips to Shannon's neck.

"Layne, we're not in our 20s anymore...remember we have a child, who's curious and asks...aaah!"

Shannon flinched when Layne sucked on his neck, it felt good. Layne pulled away, leaving a purple bruise in his wake.

"Shannon you need to chill out. Just relax." Layne said softly, kissing him again.

He stuck his tongue in Shannon's mouth, moving it against his slowly. Shannon shivered, putting his hands on Layne's face as they made out. He pulled away breathlessly.

"Wow Layne...that was..."

"Let's fuck." Layne said lowly.

"We got all night Layne...I wanted to show you some things first..." Shannon said softly, caressing Layne's cheek.

"Oh alright..." Layne pouted.

Shannon couldn't wipe the shit eating grin off of his face as he got up and picked up a box and brought it back to the bed.

"What's all that?" Layne asked softly.

"Pictures. I want to show you some pictures. You don't mind do you?" Shannon asked.

Layne shook his head. The two got comfortable beside each other and Shannon took out a few photo albums. He picked up one and opened it.

"I only have 2 pictures of myself when I was pregnant with Laina." Shannon said.

He held the book out to Layne.

"I was so young and dumb, I had my priorities fucked up. I should have had professional pictures taken. That's me right there, I think I was about 5 months." Shannon replied pointing to a picture of himself sitting on a couch with some girl. He had his hair in braids and a beard on his face. He had on an over sized burgundy shirt but you could still tell his stomach was big.

"Wow, that beard. You don't even look like yourself Shannon." Layne smiled softly, running his hand over the photo. "Who's the chick?"

"That's my cousin. Well, there's the other one." Shannon pointed.

It was a picture of Shannon sitting on another couch, looking miserably up at the camera. His hair was short. His stomach was swollen! Chris was laid out on the couch and he had his lips pressed against Shannon's stomach.

"You don't look so amused here." Layne smiled softly.

"I wasn't, I felt so miserable. My feet were always aching, my back hurt and she moved alot!" Shannon smiled.

"Who is that?" Layne asked pointing to Chris.

"Oh, remember Chris and Brad I'm always telling you about, that's Chris. You probably don't remember but they were in Blind Melon with me. I didn't tell my mom I was pregnant until after I had her. Mom had no idea. I lived with Chris during my whole pregnancy. He was the only one who knew. He was at the doctors with me when I found out. I don't know what I would have done without him. He took real good care of me. Our lives moved in totally different directions." Shannon smiled, looking at the picture, reminiscing.

Layne could feel his eyes watering up.

"I should have been there. I wish I was there."

"Don't you start that Layne. You're here now, look how far we've come. Hush up with that, we can't change the past baby." Shannon scolded.

He leaned over and kissed Layne.

"You are so wonderful with her. You're in her life now, that's all that counts. Now let's get back on track. Layne when I first had Laina, I was a mess. Me and Chris fucked around until the last minute and we didn't have anything for her. No crib, no bottles, no food, no nothing. As soon as I had her and they discharged me, we went to the mall. I had a newborn baby in my arms, with nothing to put her in. I had to hold her while Chris drove. Oh my god we were so lucky we didn't get a ticket." Shannon laughed to himself.

Layne chuckled, rubbing Shannon's leg. Shannon started flipping through the photobook, Layne looking over his shoulder. There were pictures of Laina as a toddler, pictures of Shannon with Laina. Shannon got towards the end and there was the picture of Layne and Laina that he had taken the first day Layne had met her.

Shannon blushed and quickly closed the book. "I'm sorry Layne. I know you probably don't want to see that right now."

"No babe, open it back up, let me see it. I want to, honest." Layne pouted.

Shannon slowly opened the book back to the page. Laina was smiling hard beside Layne, who barely smiled. He looked skinny and gaunt, his hair long and greasy, a bandanna over his forehead to hide the dope sores.

"Fuck. I looked like shit." Layne said slowly.

"She loved me anyway. I was completely disgusting, yet she loved me anyway." Layne replied.

"I took this picture because I thought you were gonna die when I first brought you back here Layne. Your skin was so green. I had taken it so I could show it to Laina when she got older. So I could tell her that her daddy loved her but he was very sick..." Shannon was choking up.

"I made it though Shannon. Now I have this picture to remind me of what I never want to be ever again. It all worked out. It's okay baby." Layne replied softly, pressing his lips to Shannon's cheek.

Shannon closed the book and put it up. He took out another one, old and tattered.

"You still had all the photos of us. I forgot that I had some of us too Layne. I had forgot all about them. They were here the whole time." Shannon replied opening the book.

"Look at that, do you remember that?" Shannon blushed, pointing to a picture in the book.

"Whoa! What the fuck?" Layne was shocked when he saw the photo.

It was a picture of Shannon, his bare ass exposed, looking back. His hair was down to his back, his fish tattoo visible. He looked back at the camera. Layne was kneeled down in front of him, his ringed hand balled in a fist covering his mouth. He looked at the camera and flipped it off. They both had red eyes.

"I don't fucking remember where this was, or what we were doing, or why we let someone take this." Shannon chuckled.

"We were probably drunk or high. You used to be so wild Shanny." Layne chuckled as they flipped through Shannon's book.

"Shannon! You have all the dirty pictures! Oh I remember that...oh my god we were so young and careless. That was your idea to take pictures! You used to be so dirty and horny." Layne chuckled.

"Yeah, I guess I was." Shannon cringed at some of the photos.

There were alot of provocative photos of he and Layne from the early 90s in that tattered book.

"I haven't looked at these in years." Shannon replied.

"Your ass still looks the same. Tight and white!" Layne said playfully.

"Shut up Layne!" Shannon smirked.

After looking at that book, Shannon put it up. He put the box on the floor and then looked at Layne and smirked.

"What?" Layne smiled.

Shannon slowly pulled his underwear off, dropping them on the floor with his foot. He laid back on the bed and looked at Layne shyly, his shoulders shrugged.

"Let's fuck." He said softly.

Layne stood up quickly, nearly tearing his own underwear off. He got back on the bed and straddled Shannon, grinding his erection to the bottom man's. His stomach wasn't too big yet so he could still do this.

Shannon moaned lightly as Layne shoved his tongue in and out of Shannon's mouth. He pulled away slowly, holding Shannon's arms over his head. Layne smiled down at Shannon.

"You're so fucking beautiful Shannon. Your eyes, I hope our baby has your eyes. I want it to look like you so fucking much." Layne smiled pulling off of Shannon.

"Lube's in the drawer Layne." Shannon smiled lustfully, arranging the pillows on the bed.

He turned on his stomach, resting against the pillows so he could feel comfortable. He felt adrenaline coursing through his veins. He hadn't been in this position in a while. He felt like if he made any slight movements, he would come on the bed right then and there.

Layne retrieved the lube got back on the bed. He opened the cap of the lube and poured some on his fingers. He parted Shannon's tight cheeks with his wrist and one hand and quickly inserted his fingers into Shannon's anus.

"Oooh...fuck..." Shannon said softly, flinching a bit.

"Your tighter than I remember Shannon. Don't worry, I'll stretch it out for you again tonight." Layne smiled as he thrust his fingers in and out of Shannon, preparing him for lustful act. Shannon breathed hard, sighing as he felt Layne playing around inside of him.

After a few minutes, Layne pulled out and lubed up his cock. He stroked himself for a few minutes. Shannon looked back as far as he could to look at Layne. Layne slapped Shannon's ass. Shannon got up on all fours, sticking his ass out and smirking to himself. Layne guided his dick to Shannon's opening. He pushed his dick into Shannon, holding onto Shannon's sides as he slowly stated to thrust into him. Shannon gripped the sheets, moaning lightly.

"I wanna scream so fucking bad Shanny, this feels so great." Layne whimpered as he fucked Shannon.

He grunted with his thrusts, pounding into Shannon. Shannon had his eyes closed, reaching down and jerking off his cock, breathing hard.

"Shanny, I'm close already, this feels so fucking good." Layne whispered as his body moved up and down against Shannon's.

Layne started shaking and whimpering as his orgasm came on.

"Pull out! Pull out!" Shannon moaned.

Layne quickly pulled out of Shannon and with one final stroke, he orgasmed all over Shannon's thighs, whimpering lightly. He wanted to scream but he couldn't.

Layne laid down beside Shannon, breathing hard and holding his stomach. Shannon turned around, still running his hand up and down his own cock.

Layne smirked as he reached over and smacked Shannon's hand away, taking over and jerking Shannon off.

Shannon bit his lip, his brow furrowed as he watched Layne play with his dick.

"I'm almost there..." Shannon breathed, his voice coming out in a raspy whisper.

Layne thumbed his tip and that was it for Shannon. He bucked his hips into Layne's hand as his cum shot up out of his cock like a cannon. It landed on random places on the bed.

Shannon lay there, staring at the ceiling, smirking.

"You are so hot when you cum." Layne whispered, kissing Shannon's cheek.

"That felt so good. It felt so good to do it in our bed. I fucking love this life. Here with you. I'm so lucky." Shannon smiled looking over at Layne.

"I know what you mean baby. I feel so fucking sexy!" Layne smiled, pressing his lips to Shannon's.

The two men made out for a bit, putting hickeys on each other. Layne was sure to take his partials out before going to sleep. Eventually they moved under the covers and before they knew it, they were fast asleep, holding each other.

* * *

Layne stirred to hear screaming. He furrowed his brows and put a pillow over his face.

The doorknob to their bedroom turned frantically.

"DADDY! DADDY LAYNE? DADDY SHANNON!"

Laina bang her little hands on the door.

"Fuck did we forget to unlock the door?" Shannon asked tiredly, still half asleep. He was under the covers completely.

"Yeah, but we couldn't unlock it anyway, wouldn't want her rolling all around on this nasty comforter." Layne said tiredly.

The child still cried and banged on the door as they talked.

Shannon chuckled. "Last night was so fucking hot. I wanna do it again."

Shannon took the covers off of his head and Layne took the pillow off of his face, smiling at Shannon. Shannon leaned in and pressed a kiss to Layne's bare mouth. Layne nuzzled his nose against Shannon's.

"Daddy! Why did you lock the door! Daddy are you okay! Let me in!" Laina cried. She started sobbing outside of the door.

Shannon sighed and sat up, running his hand through his messy hair. They were both naked.

"Laina I just woke up. Stop doing that, we'll let you in as soon as we get up."

"What are you doing in there Daddy Layne, Daddy Shannon?" She cried.

Layne had gotten up and got in the shower.

"Laina go sit in the living room and turn the tv on. We'll be there in a minute! We just woke up!" Shannon said annoyed.

He heard silence and he got up and started stripping the bedclothes off the bed to be washed.

After Layne had his shower, he put his teeth in and combed his hair and he was ready for his day. He got dressed and left out of the room to tend to Laina.

Shannon took his shower and got dressed and remade the bed and then left out of the bedroom. When he got downstairs, Laina was sitting at the kitchen table, her head resting on her hand, her hand holding a spoon, eating her oatmeal. She was clean and dressed and her hair was pulled back into a perfect ponytail.

Layne was standing at the stove, fixing some more oatmeal for he and Shannon. Shannon couldn't help but to feel warmth in his heart. Layne was getting things done. Shannon walked over to Layne and put his arms around his stomach and kissed his temple.

"There's yours babe." Layne smiled, looking at Shannon.

Shannon grabbed his bowl and sat at the table, smiling at Laina as he ate. Layne soon joined them after he had set glasses of water down for them. The three ate in silence, spoons clinking, glasses being sipped.

Shannon couldn't help but look back and forth from Layne and Laina. This was so perfect. They were eating at the table as a family.

"I'll get the dishes Layne since you cooked." Shannon smiled.

"Thanks." Layne smiled.

"Laina are you ready for our guitar lessons today?" Layne asked Laina.

She smiled and nodded, looking down at her plate.

"Oh you guys are getting guitar lessons?" Shannon asked.

"Yeah. It's just this tape I ordered that shows you how to play riffs. She's gotta start early so she can shred by the time she's 13!" Layne smiled.

Laina shrugged her shoulders and smiled bright at Layne.

"You guys are so cute." Shannon smirked watching his family.

* * *

5 months

"Mom? Yeah, it's Shannon! Guess what, we just got out of the doctor's office. Yeah, uh huh, it's a boy! Yes...we are so happy, we wanted a boy. Oh yes. Yeah, everything's going great mom. Their still watching his blood sugar. It's borderline but they say its okay for now. They want him to come back in two weeks to check his blood sugar again. Yeah. Yeah okay."

Shannon was driving and talking on his cell phone at the same time.

"Layne, mom wants to talk to you." Shannon smirked.

Layne took the phone and spoke.

"Hello? Hey...yeah, yeah I know. I'm so happy. Eh, I didn't even know I don't feel lightheaded or dizzy or anything. Yeah maybe its just because I had a bowl of cereal this morning. Lately I've been craving cinnamon toast crunch hard. Yeah...yeah I know!"

Layne laughed on the phone with Shannon's mom.

"Thanks. Okay. Okay. Here's Shannon."

Layne handed the phone to Shannon.

"Daddy? Daddy I'm getting a little brother?" Laina asked from the backseat.

Layne looked back. "Yeah babe." He smiled.

"What's his name?" Laina asked.

"His name's gonna be Shayne. A mix between your daddy's names." Layne smirked.

Layne had been thinking of this for months. He was so relieved when it was revealed that he was actually having a boy. He had wished so hard for a boy.

"Shayne! Shayne! Shaaayyyne!" Laina screamed.

"Laina Nel!" Shannon frowned, looking at her in the rear view mirror.

Laina sunk down in her seat pouting. Layne smirked, looking out the window.

Shannon finally hung up the cell phone, throwing it in the cupholder.

"What were you two talking about? Layne what'd you say to make baby girl scream back there?" Shannon smirked.

Laina pouted.

"She asked me what was his name going to be." Layne said softly.

"And?" Shannon asked.

"Shayne. S-H-A-Y-N-E. Like a combination of our names. What do ya think?" Layne asked.

"That's so cute. I love it. Well what's his middle name gonna be?" Shannon asked.

"What about your first name?" Layne asked.

"Shayne Richard Staley. That's so cute. That's fuc-er friggen awesome!" Shannon smiled, catching himself before he cursed.

Laina had picked up a bad habit of repeating what adults said and she had been repeating curse words.

"SHAYNE!" Laina screamed from the top of her lungs.

"Laina Nel! Please! Inside voice!" Shannon said through gritted teeth.

"God! Where does she get that from?" Shannon asked, glancing over at Layne.

* * *

7 months

Shannon had hired a private photographer to come to their house and photograph he and Layne's baby pictures. It was a person recommended to them by Chris and Brad. It was someone they could trust.

Things were getting tough for Layne now. His blood sugar had ended up being too high and he had gestational diabetes. He was on insulin and Shannon had to care for him 24/7 because Layne was so scared to shoot himself up. He had been through so much he just couldn't do it.

Laina was getting bad too. She started getting into trouble. She was picking up on things fast. She knew what a hickey was and had a fascination of sucking on people's skin to leave a bruise. She was cursing and thinking it was funny. She was being loud and noisy. A complete change from the quiet child she used to be. Layne was in no position to discipline. Shannon had to always be the one to discipline her.

She skipped around as the photographer Ben took a picture of Layne and Shannon. They were shirtless. Shannon stood behind Layne, his arms wrapped around Layne's stomach. Layne was very self conscious about the way he looked. He didn't really go out anymore, and if he did, he stayed in the car. He only went out to places he had to go, such as the doctor.

"Your stomach sticks out so far Layne. Mines was not like that." Shannon smiled as a picture was taken.

Layne looked back at Shannon.

"That's because Shayne's got your big ass head. That's what this is, his big ass head."

Shannon and Layne burst out laughing and Ben snapped a photo.

"Beautiful guys!" He smiled.

Layne turned around facing Shannon. Shannon arched his back, making his stomach stand out. They put their stomachs together and looked down, Shannon smirked. A photo was taken.

"Laina! Come here!" Layne called.

Laina ran back in the living room. She had on a black dress that matched the theme of the photo shoot. Layne and Shannon were wearing black pants. Shannon slipped on a black tank top. Layne and Shannon took Laina's hands and lifted her arms up in the air. She giggled. A photo was taken.

Laina looked up at Layne's protruding belly and stood on her tip toes and place a kiss to it. Shannon and Layne looked down at her and smiled. Another photo was taken. After the photo was taken, Laina still stood there, her mouth attached to Layne's stomach.

"What's she doing?" Ben laughed.

"Ah, stop it you little hoover!" Layne said softly tapping Laina's shoulder. She giggled and looked up at Layne. Shannon was getting irritated.

He put his hand on her shoulder and nearly ripped her off of Layne. Sure enough a purple bruise lay on his stomach. It was her weird kid habit.

"Laina I told you to stop doing that! Stop it! It's nasty!" Shannon frowned, pointing in her face.

"But you and daddy do it to each other!" She pouted.

Shannon sighed. "DON'T DO IT AGAIN or else!" He threatened, his voice coming out strict.

Laina pouted and ran off.

"She's really cute guys." Ben smiled.

"Thanks." Shannon smiled and sighed. "How about one more?" Shannon asked.

"Sure."

Shannon kneeled down, puckering his lips and pressing them to Layne's stomach. The last photo was taken.

After that, Layne looked at Shannon. "I'm feeling kind of dizzy babe. I think its this lighting. Help me sit down?" Layne asked softly.

"Yeah, Okay. Check your blood sugar. I'll get your meter." Shannon said helping Layne sit down. He kissed Layne's temple then leaned down to kiss Layne's stomach.

Ben was packing up.

"These were some great photos guys. I'll give you a call when their ready, they should be ready in 2 or 3 weeks."

"Okay, no problem. Thanks." Shannon smiled, seeing him out the door. He then rushed over and got Layne's meter and took it over to him. Shannon held it out to Layne as Layne pricked his finger and dropped the blood on the meter and Shannon pressed the button to read it. Layne sucked on his finger and watched the reading.

"It's a little high babe. You need some insulin. I'll get it, just sit tight. I'll get you a snack too." Shannon smiled, kissing Layne.

Shannon was honestly ready for this pregnancy to be over. Poor Layne had been through alot during the past year and a half. He had went from being addicted to drugs and now his body was taking a beating from this pregnancy. It was draining him. Shannon was very upset when the doctors told them that Layne had gestational diabetes. They were almost there, in 3 months Shayne would be delivered by c-section. Everything was okay, Shayne was developing normally.

Shannon smiled to himself. He just had Shannon's big ass head that's why Layne's stomach stuck so far out.

Shannon got Layne's insulin kit and fixed a syringe for him. Shannon injected it into Layne the way the doctors had showed them.

"Here's some crackers." Shannon said handing Layne a package of Ritz crackers.

"Thanks babe. I love you." Layne said, tearing the package open and eating them.

He felt like a beached whale. He was so lazy. Layne gasped when he felt Shayne kick. He touched his stomach.

Shannon smiled and felt on Layne's stomach.

"It's like he has 4 arms or something. He's really fast in there." Shannon smirked.

"He must like to fight like you used to." Layne smirked.

He loved comparing their son to Shannon. Layne still prayed for a spitting image of Shannon.

They were making out when all of a sudden Layne pulled away and sniffed the air.

"Do you smell that?" Layne asked.

Shannon sniffled.

"Yeah...what is that?"

They looked at each other.

"Laina!" They said at the same time.

A few seconds after they said that, they heard what sounded like a bunch of pots and pans falling.

Shannon frowned and gritted his teeth and stood up. He was pissed.

"Shannon..." Layne called softly.

Shannon ignored Layne as he stormed in the kitchen to see the scene unfolding. Laina was standing on the counter, her hand in the cabinet, looking back at Shannon with a deer in the headlights look. She had a pot on the stove with water in it, boiling over, hitting the eye and making that weird smell. There were contents from the cabinet all over the floor.

Shannon gave her a look of daggers. She immediately started crying. She knew she had done wrong when Shannon gave her that look.

Shannon was honestly stressed out. Layne's diabetes, trying to get the room together for Shayne, preparing for the hospital stay, keeping Layne's mom up on things, Layne still hadn't spoken to her yet and that was just another can of worms, and to top it all off, Laina had started acting out and being very bad during the most important part of Layne's pregnancy. Shannon did not have time for this. He couldn't figure out why she was being this way. She used to be such a nice and quiet girl.

He walked over and turned the stove off and then started going towards Laina. Laina quickly jumped off of the counter and was about to break off in a run but Shannon got to her before she could break off. He grabbed her arm hard and yanked her back towards him.

"OW DADDY YOUR HURTING ME!" She screamed and cried.

Shannon lost it.

"What the hell are you doing in here little girl!? What did I tell you? Huh!? I told you you aren't allowed to touch ANY appliances! You are no where near old enough to touch that stove! You could have burned the house down! You could have hurt yourself! I'm so sick of this shit Laina! I don't have time for this!"

Shannon shook her as he yelled at her. She sobbed loudly.

"I hate you daddy!" She screamed in his face.

Shannon gasped, taken aback. She was only 7 years old and she was already saying this to him. He thought that she wouldn't say this until she was a teenager. Shannon's feelings were hurt internally. He masked the hurt with anger.

"Don't you talk back to me!"

He started whooping her in the kitchen as he held onto her arm hard, nearly leaving bruises.

She screamed and cried as Shannon whooped her, trying to run away but he had a death grip on her arm.

"I hate you daddy! I hate you!" She continued to scream and cry once Shannon had let her go.

She backed away from him. He was about to speak but she took off in a run.

"Don't walk away from me little girl!" Shannon was so pissed.

Laina ran in the living room over to Layne and climbed on the couch and wrapped her arms around his neck and sobbed. Layne was visibly shaken as he had heard the whole scene in the living room. He held onto her and bit his lip. He was going to cry himself.

"Shannon c'mon don't be so hard on her." Layne replied as Shannon came towards the couch.

"No Layne, No! She needs to learn that she can't keep doing this. We have too much going on, we don't have time to put up with her shit!"

"Shannon calm down, you're cursing!" Layne started crying now.

Shannon ripped Laina away from Layne. He had a strong arm around her waist as he carried her to her room. She hit his arm and kicked and screamed. Shannon threw her on her bed.

"You stay in here! Your fucking grounded! I better not hear anything out of you little girl or I'm going to go get a belt!" Shannon threatened, pointing at her and then he slammed the door shut.

In the hallway, he started shaking, putting his hand on his waist and the other shakily to his forehead. Something had to be done. He couldn't do it all. He couldn't keep up with all this shit.

He went down to his bedroom and called his mother.

"Hello?"

"Mom, it's Shannon." Shannon sobbed.

"Shannon? What's wrong?" She asked, concerned.

"Mom, can you come get Laina? She's really bugging me. Mom I just whooped her, like for the first time. Mom she keeps acting bad. Layne's blood sugar is acting up and I just can't handle her right now...I just can't handle all this. Mom please..." Shannon sobbed on the phone.

"I'll be over there in a few minutes honey!"

Shannon sniffled. "Thanks."

Shannon hung up and slowly went back down the stairs. Layne was beached on the couch. He couldn't get up without any help.

He frowned at Shannon as Shannon neared the couch.

"What?" Shannon sniffled and wiped his eyes.

"You didn't have to hit her." Layne frowned.

"Well what else was I supposed to do Layne? She doesn't listen to me anymore. I called my mom. Mom's coming to get her. I gotta figure something out. Maybe she'll stay with mom until the baby's born. She's just too out of control. I'm so tired Layne."

Tears fell down hormonal Layne's face.

"So you're just shipping her away? Just like that?"

"I don't know what else to do Layne. I can't watch her and watch you too! I just don't know why she's acting out. She fucking hates me...I don't want to keep being the bad guy but she's always getting into stuff. I just don't know how to handle her right now!"

Shannon was freaking out.

"Shanny, calm down, it's gonna be okay. Maybe staying the night at her gramma's will do her some good. Maybe me and you can talk to her when she gets back and explain to her that she needs to be on her best behavior because we're really tired or something, ya know?"

"Yeah." Shannon sniffled.

He was so stressed out.

Minutes later, Mama Nel was over to pick Laina up. It had started raining outside. She hugged Shannon.

"Oh my poor son, it's gonna be okay. You know these phases that kids go through. Where is she?"

"She's up in her room. I told her she was grounded." Shannon said softly.

Nel nodded and went upstairs. Shannon sighed and sat back down, holding Layne's hand.

"The rain's really coming down out there, it's making me tired." Layne yawned.

"You wanna lay down?" Shannon asked softly.

Layne nodded.

Shannon helped Layne lay on the couch. He covered him up with a blanket and kissed his temple.

Layne was snoring lightly in less than a minute.

"Shannon? Where's Laina?" Nel called from upstairs.

Shannon furrowed his brows and sighed. He walked upstairs.

"Shes in her room." He said walking in the room.

"She's not in here honey, I looked everywhere, in the closet, under the bed." Nel shrugged.

Shannon furrowed his brows further. He walked into each room upstairs, looking for her.

"Laina Nel, this isn't funny. Gramma's here to pick you up, stop playing hide and seek!" Shannon was getting angry again.

Nel searched downstairs. Layne was asleep through this whole ordeal.

Shannon finally walked into the bedroom he shared with Layne. Their window was open.

"What the hell?" He mumbled to himself as he closed it. He looked on their bed.

Laina's favorite stuffed animal Violet sit in the middle of the bed. Shannon's heart melted. He picked it up and looked at it, running his finger over the beady eyes. He looked back on the bed and noticed a folded piece of paper.

He furrowed his brows and picked it up and opened it and read it.

It was a letter from Laina, in her handwriting.

 

Daddy Shannon is so mean. Daddy Shannon won't let me help with Shayne. All he does is yell at me. He hates me and I hate him. Why does he hate me? I don't know but I running away.

Goodbye Daddy Layne. Sorry

 

Shannon stood there, processing this little note. His baby girl was getting to be so smart. He put two and two together. He looked at the window. It was open when he walked in....there was a note on the bed....

"MOM!" Shannon screamed, running to the window and opening it, looking out.

"Laina!? Laina!" Shannon screamed out the window, rain hitting him in the face.

Their room was on the 2nd story, how the hell did Laina get to the ground from there? What if she was laying on the ground dead? Shannon climbed out the window, standing on the roof and looking around.

"Laina!?" He screamed, raining pelting him.

"Shannon, what the hell are you doing, get back in here!" Nel exclaimed.

Shannon walked to the edge of the roof and looked down. He didn't see anything but the bushes and grass.

He turned around and shakily climbed back in through the window.

He started sobbing uncontrollably.

"Mom...read this! Mom where's my baby!?" Shannon wailed.

Nel read the note that Laina had left. She gasped and looked at Shannon.

"Where's my baby Mom!" Shannon wailed.

"Shannon calm down, she couldn't have gotten far. C'mon let's go search for her!"

"Who's gonna stay with Layne?" Shannon cried.

"Call Chris and Brad!" She exclaimed.

* * *

Nel and Shannon drove around the neighborhood looking for rebellious little Laina. Shannon was crying hysterically.

"It's raining, I just know she's cold, what if she gets sick. What if someone has kidnapped her? What if she's hurt! Oh god I wish I didn't hit her! Oh my god this is my worst nightmare! Where is she?" Shannon cried.

His heart was broken. He would have never thought Laina had the mentality to do something like this.

"Shannon, keep your head on straight, we're going to find her. She couldn't have gone far!" Nel exclaimed.

Shannon rocked back and forth in his seat. He still sobbed.

Laina was his life. Laina was everything. If he lost Laina, he'd lose himself.

He closed his eyes. He just wanted to hug her and give her some hot chocolate and tell her he loved her. He wanted to apologize to her.

He just wanted her home and safe.

He continued to sob.

"My baby....where's my baby...oh god..."


	10. 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He suddenly screamed over everyone's arguing and crying. Everyone got silent and looked over at Layne. Shannon rushed over to Layne. "Babe? Babe are you okay?" He asked worriedly. "No! Take me to the hospital! Something's not right!" Layne exclaimed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not good at making up songs so I just made Layne do some cover tunes lol

_  
Laina sit in her room after Shannon had threw her on her bed. She frowned and she had her arms crossed over her chest. She was so mad at Shannon. All she had been trying to do was help out with her new little brother Shayne. Everything she tried to do, daddy Shannon would get real mad and yell at her._

_That's all she can remember for a while is Shannon constantly yelling at her or scolding her, making her feel like she couldn't do anything right. She was also sad because daddy Layne couldn't play with her anymore like he used to. Shayne was taking up too much room in his stomach and daddy Layne could only just lay or sit there. He was tired all the time._

_Laina stood by her door. She heard Shannon walk by and down the stairs. Once she was sure that he was gone, she went over to her desk and scribbled a note for her dads. She decided she would live outside. Maybe she could make friends with animals like on the Disney movies._

_She grabbed Violet and took the note and slowly opened her door, peeking out. She looked around and tiptoed down the hall and went into her father's room. She put the note on the bed and sat Violet on top of it, kissing the bear._

_She didn't really think this through. She wasn't bringing anything with her. She walked over to the window and opened it, climbing out onto the roof. The clouds in the sky were dark like it was going to rain._

_Laina walked over to the edge of the roof and looked down. How would she get down to the ground? She couldn't let daddy Shannon see her leaving. She couldn't walk through the house. She walked over to the far right of the roof and saw a fence looking thing on the side of the house with weeds and flowers growing up it. She started climbing down it. At that time, the rain started pouring down. She wined as it soaked her, her hair matting to her head instantly._

_Suddenly halfway down, she lost her footing because the rain had pelted her in her eye. She screamed as she stumbled and fell the rest of the way down, landing on her arm in the bushes. She rolled around, and started sobbing. She looked around. Her arm hurt really bad. She didn't know what to do. She suddenly heard daddy Shannon's voice._

_"Laina!? Laina!"_

_Laina's eyes widened. She stood up scurried away before Shannon could see her. She ran around to the backyard and sat in the mud that had formed under the back patio. She shivered. Her arm was limp and it hurt real bad._

_She wanted to run away but she didn't know where to go and she was too scared so she just stayed under the porch, alone, hurting, wet and crying._

__

* * *

Layne started stirring on the couch. He had been sleeping for hours. Pregnancy made him real tired. He kept his eyes closed as he heard soft crying. He heard voices.

"No no honey, don't bother him, he's sleeping. Just wait for Shannon to come home."

"Are you calling him babe?"

"Yeah It's ringing right now...Hello? Shannon, Shannon babe, she's back. Yeah. Yeah she just walked in the door. Okay. Okay hurry back."

"Daddy!!!!"

Layne opened his eyes and slowly sat up. He saw Chris and Brad standing in his living room, Laina standing in front of Brad, holding her little arm, looking dirty and disheveled.

They all looked at each other. Laina ran away from Brad and over to Layne, hugging his stomach and crying hysterically.

"What the hell...what are you guys doing here? Where's Shannon?" Layne said tiredly looking down at his dirty child.

"Hi Layne." Chris smiled awkwardly.

Brad smiled and waved.

"Baby what happened to you, why are you so dirty? Where's Shannon?" Layne said again looking at the guys.

"My arm hurts daddy my arm!" Laina cried.

Layne looked at Laina's limp arm. He touched it slightly and she screamed.

"Is your arm...broke? What the fuck!" Layne exclaimed looking at Brad and Chris.

They were just about to start explaining what was going on when suddenly the door burst open and Shannon ran in, rain soaked.

He looked at Laina and rushed over to her and wrapped his arms around her.

"Laina! Baby I was so worried about you!" Shannon exclaimed.

Laina screamed.

"Shannon watch her arm, something's wrong with her arm!" Layne exclaimed.

"What?" Shannon exclaimed looking at her arm.

She looked at Shannon and burst out crying. Shannon's mom came in the house and everyone started arguing with each other, and Laina was screaming and crying.

Layne just sat there staring straight ahead. He started feeling very bad. He rubbed his stomach and furrowed his brows. This didn't feel like a blood sugar problem. His stomach felt like it was going to implode. He kept rubbing it. Shayne didn't seem to be moving and his stomach was hurting really bad all of a sudden.

He suddenly screamed over everyone's arguing and crying.

Everyone got silent and looked over at Layne. Shannon rushed over to Layne.

"Babe? Babe are you okay?" He asked worriedly.

"No! Take me to the hospital! Something's not right!" Layne exclaimed.

"What? What do you mean?" Shannon asked.

"Just take me to the fucking hospital!" Layne screamed and snapped.

This started another round of commotion through the house as everyone started running around like chickens without their heads cut off. Nel announced she would take Laina to the hospital to get her arm checked out, so that was taken care of. Brad and Chris hung around to help Shannon out with Layne. They went ahead and helped Layne in the car as Shannon frantically ran around turning lights off, getting wallets and things.

Chris and Brad went home as Shannon ran to the car and drove Layne to the hospital. Layne was crying the whole way there. He wouldn't tell Shannon what was wrong no matter how much Shannon begged. Shannon was freaking out, speeding as he was trying to get Layne to the ER. He had no idea what was going on with his husband and his little girl had just tried to run away and had apparently hurt herself. It was all too much for Shannon.

* * *

Layne sobbed as he lay there in the hospital bed as nurses and a doctor crowded around him, looking at his stomach through ultrasounds and feeling all over him. Shannon had went to go check on Laina, who was on another floor. Layne was all alone and he was scared.

"Layne, there's alot of pressure in your stomach, I think that's what's causing the pain. We're gonna have to give you a c-section pronto. Your baby appears to not have enough room to move around. It's safe to just go ahead and remove him from the womb."

Layne's eyes widened.

"Where's Shannon? I need to call Shannon! Shannon needs to be here!" Layne exclaimed.

"I'm sorry Layne, we have to do this right now, we don't have time to wait for anyone." The doctor replied.

The nurses were already pacing around the room, getting instrument trays ready, getting counts, wheeling things over to the table. Layne's heart rate picked up. He was so scared. Was Shayne deformed or something? Why didn't he have any room in Layne's stomach? He was gonna be a preemie. He would be 3 months early.

It took three nurses to help Layne sit at the edge of the bed as he received the epidural. Layne's stomach was so round and in the way that Layne just didn't have the strength to slide back, he was pushed back by the nurses. It hit instantly, Layne was numb from the waist down.

This was all happening too fast for Layne. He sobbed as the curtain was put in front of his stomach so he couldn't see. He was so upset the doctor didn't even talk to him during the procedure, he was directing the nurses.

Meanwhile, Shannon had just finished checking on Laina. Her arm was indeed broken. He really didn't have the chance to talk to her about what had happened. Shannon's mom stayed with Laina as the doctors prepared to set her little arm and put her cast on. Shannon felt so overwhelmed as he ran through the halls, making his way back to Layne's room. He furrowed his brows as he walked over to the door and the door was closed.

He looked through the glass and peeked inside. He saw the doctors and the nurses all standing around the front of Layne's bed. He quickly realized what was going on. He put his hands on his head and then started knocking on the door.

"Layne? Layne! Hey let me in that's my husband! I need to be in there!!!" He screamed.

Meanwhile, inside of the room, one of the nurses ran over to the door and opened it. Shannon tried to walk in past her as she shoved him out, slamming the door shut behind her.

"What the fuck is going on in there? What's wrong with him? I'm his husband! Why didn't you fucking page me or call me!?" Shannon exclaimed.

"Sir, sir, I'm gonna need you to calm down. The doctor is in there removing the baby from the womb. You can't come in here now. I'm gonna need you to go to the waiting room or I'm afraid I'm gonna have to call security to remove you from the premises. You can't come in there now, the doctor is in the middle of the procedure."

"But that's my husband...and my baby..." Shannon sobbed, putting his hands to his face.

"I know sir, we will come get you when it's over if you would just go sit in the waiting room."

The nurse pointed.

Shannon sobbed as he slowly made his way to the waiting room. He was missing the birth of his baby. This day was turning out to be total shit. What the hell; why were they even taking Shayne out this early? Shannon sat in the waiting room and sobbed loudly, not caring about the people around him.

* * *

"Mr. Staley? Mr. Staley?"

Shannon stirred. He had curled up in the chair and had fallen asleep. He was so tired from everything that was going on that day. He opened his eyes to look up at Layne's doctor. He had a smile on his face.

Shannon sat up quickly looking at him.

"Where's my husband, and my kid? Are they okay?" Shannon exclaimed.

"Everyone's healthy. C'mon, you can see them now." He smiled.

Shannon put his fingers to his mouth, gnawing on his fingernails as he was led back into the hospital, back to Layne's room. Shannon was greeted by a nurse who gave him scrubs to wear. Shannon hastily put them on and the door to Layne's room was open.

Shannon walked in and looked over at Layne. Layne lay there, with a huge smile on his face. His eyes were tired. He looked in Layne's arm and furrowed his brows.

"What? Who?" He pointed, stuttering.

Layne smiled and looked up at Shannon.

Layne had a baby in each arm, two boys, wrapped in blue blankets. They were so tiny and fragile.

"Twins baby, twins." Layne smiled, his eyes watering.

"Twins? How? What the hell?" Shannon said walking over to Layne, looking at his babies.

"One of them was way back in Layne's stomach, and the other one was at the front. That was why his stomach was so big. We just couldn't pick up the second boy on the ultrasound." The nurse smiled.

Shannon was shocked. He stood there staring down at Layne and the babies.

They had only had enough things for one baby. The second baby was a major surprise.

"This is Shayne, but what do we name him? Shannon I want you to name him." Layne replied, shrugging his shoulder Shayne was against then the other baby.

Shannon sat in the chair and put his hand on Shayne's blanket, then his twin brother. Shannon could feel the tears falling down his face.

"Shannon, they look just like you. Look, they have your nose, your face...their gonna have your eyes. I'm so happy." Layne smiled, sniffling.

Shannon carefully took baby number 2 out of Layne's arms and held him, looking down at him. He couldn't wipe the shit eating grin off of his face. Twins. They had twins. He bit his lip and studied baby 2. Layne was right, these kids looked just like him. They were identical twins. Shannon started crying as he looked down at his baby.

The little baby furrowed his brows and turned his head, his little hand curling beside his face as Shannon held him.

"Zaine." Shannon sniffled.

"What?" Layne asked softly.

"I'm naming him Zaine Alexander Staley." Shannon sniffled.

"Shayne and Zaine." Layne sniffled. "Zaine's really different."

"I've always wanted to know someone with a name that begins with a Z." Shannon smiled.

"I can't believe we have twins Shannon." Layne said softly.

"Me neither. I love them. They are so precious. Thank you Layne. Thank you so much." Shannon smiled, lifting Zaine up to kiss his forehead.

"Let's trade." Shannon sniffled.

The nurse helped them. She took Zaine from Shannon and carefully placed him back in Layne's arm and took Shayne and put him in Shannon's arms.

"Hi Shayne. Hi it's me, daddy Shannon." Shannon said softly, kissing his baby boy.

Shayne furrowed his brows and opened his little mouth like he was going to cry, a light whine escaping his fragile little lips.

"Aw baby its okay. Daddy's here. Oh he's so cute. My boys. Their so precious." Shannon cooed.

"How are you feeling Layne?" Shannon asked.

"I feel a little woozy. But I'm happy you are finally here Shannon. We've been through so much. Look at us now. Three kids. I can't believe I'm here right now. This life is good. I love you baby."

"I love you too Layne. You gave me two beautiful boys. Our life is perfect." Shannon sighed.

Eventually Shannon placed Shayne back in Layne's arms. He sat there rubbing Layne's forehead, admiring their boys. He kissed Layne and placed a kiss on Shayne and Zaine's foreheads.

The nurse had to take the babies for their examinations and to put them in the NIC unit with the other premature babies. Shayne and Laine would be there for a while until the doctor released them. They still had a little developing to do. Shannon sit with Layne, holding his hand and smiling at his husband.

They weren't really married yet but they already had the rings. So many things were going on that they hadn't had time to do that yet.

Shannon leaned down and kissed Layne softly. As they were doing this, the door to their room suddenly opened and Laina walked in with Nel, a pink cast on her arm. She walked behind Nel, looking up at Shannon shyly.

Shannon's bottom lip quivered as he looked at his daughter. Nel went over to Layne and kissed his forehead, asking him how he was doing.

"Laina come over here, I'm sorry." Shannon said, tears filling his eyes.

Laina slowly walked over to Shannon and pouted. Shannon lifted her up and set her in his lap, hugging her.

"I'm sorry baby girl. Why'd you run away? I was so worried about you. My heart was breaking, I didn't know where you were, or what had happened to you. Why'd you do that?" Shannon asked her softly, kissing her cheek.

Laina had her free arm around Shannon's neck, her face buried in his shirt as she sobbed lightly. She didn't say anything.

"I'm real sorry I've been hard on you honey. Things have just been so crazy with daddy Layne and getting ready for the birth honey. I'm sorry I yelled at you so much." Shannon said softly, kissing her forehead.

Laina held onto Shannon, pressing her face into his chest.

"You know daddy had two babies." Shannon whispered in her ear.

Laina looked up at Shannon, her eyes widened.

"Two?" She asked, sniffling.

"Yeah. You've got two brothers. We didn't even know about Zaine."

"Shayne and Zaine?" Laina repeated.

"Yeah. You know, we're gonna need alot of help with them. They can't do anything for themselves right now. You gonna help your little brothers out?" Shannon smiled at his daughter.

She smiled and nodded. Shannon smiled and leaned down, kissing his daughter's lips and pulled her close to him.

"We'll sign your cast later baby. It's so pretty. How did you break your arm honey?" Shannon asked.

"I fell." Laina said tiredly.

Shannon sighed and rocked her back and forth, looking over at Layne and his mom. He sighed and closed his eyes.

* * *

3 Months Later

Layne and Laina jumped on the trampoline that was now in the backyard. Layne just couldn't resist spoiling his children. He had Laina jumping high in the air. She screamed and squealed.

"Stand back baby, watch this!" Layne said excitedly as he jumped, gaining air and he suddenly did a flip on the trampoline.

Laina wanted to be just like Layne. She tried to do a flip and she fell.

"Hey! Layne don't let her do that...that's dangerous!" Shannon called from in the house.

Layne smacked his lips. "She's okay Shannon, you okay baby?"

"Yeah huh!" Laina giggled, getting up and jumping again.

Layne stopped jumping and Laina did too. He leaned down and whispered in her ear.

"Don't listen to daddy Shannon, don't give up, you'll be able to do a flip eventually. You can flip if you want to honey."

Laina looked at Layne and giggled and started jumping high again. Layne started jumping too to help her. He helped her gain air and she finally did a flip and landed shakily on her feet.

"Yaaah baby!" Layne smiled clapping his hands.

They laughed together as they started jumping again. Suddenly Shannon came outside, holding Zaine.

"Layne, come here." He said, bouncing his boy on his shoulder.

"What?" Layne asked as he jumped off the trampoline.

Laina continued to jump, looking over at her daddies.

"Layne, your mom's on the phone." Shannon said as Layne came up to him.

Layne leaned put his hand on Zaine's head and kissed it, then looked at Shannon.

"What?" He sighed.

"Your mom Layne, you need to speak to her. She really wants to talk to you. Just speak to her, that's all I'm asking. You don't have to do anything but speak to her." Shannon sighed.

Layne pouted, and sighed.

"Fine. Fine. I'll talk to my mom." He sighed.

"Yeah, stop putting it off baby. Give me a kiss." Shannon smiled a little.

Layne leaned in and kissed Shannon, pulling away and smiling.

"Daddy!" Laina called as Layne began to walk in the house.

Layne stopped and turned around.

"I got an important phone call sweetie. I'll be back in a few minutes. Keep having fun! Love you!" Layne called, waving at her as he disappeared in the house.

Shannon walked back in the house as well, following behind Layne up the stairs. Layne went into their bedroom and Shannon went into the boy's room, putting Zaine in the crib beside his sleeping brother, Shayne. He smiled and sighed as he stared at his twins. They were so perfect. He walked out, walking past their bedroom.

Layne sat in the window seal of their bedroom, looking down into the backyard at his daughter jumping on the trampoline. He looked over at the phone that was off the hook on the nightstand. He felt nervous. He sighed, slowly picking up the phone and putting it to his ear.

He waited for a few minutes before he spoke.

"Hello?" He said slowly.

"Layne? Layne is that you?" His mom Nancy said desperately.

"Yeah. It's me." Layne said softly.

He could hear sobbing on the other end. He sighed, looking down at his shirt.

"I miss you Layne. I haven't heard from you in a long time." Nancy began.

Layne was silent.

"Shannon has been keeping me informed on things. He tells me you finished rehab hon." She began.

"Yeah. I did. I'm not on drugs anymore." Layne said softly.

"That's so wonderful baby. I'm so happy for you." She cried.

There was more silence.

"Layne, we miss you so much. Me and your sister. We wish you would come see us." She cried.

"I'm not coming back to Seattle mom. My life is here now." Layne said bluntly.

"I'm sorry about everything Layne. I'm so sorry." She cried.

"How could you mom? How could you fucking give my picture to the tabloids?" Layne said softly.

"I didn't baby, I didn't! I swear I would never do that to you Layne! This guy called me wanting to interview me about you, and I was so gullible, I let him in the house. He asked me a few questions and somehow he stole that picture from me honey. I swear to you I did not give your picture to any tabloids. I've made no money off of you Layne!" Nancy exclaimed.

Layne looked down and grunted softly.

"I guess if that hadn't had happened, I wouldn't be here with Shannon. That's how Shannon found me you know, on the tv. He saw my picture and he came and rescued me." Layne replied softly.

"He sends me pictures of your little girl. Laina is so beautiful. I wish I could meet her Layne." Nancy cried.

Layne sighed.

"Where are you Layne? Please let us come see you!" Nancy begged.

"I don't know mom." Layne said unsure.

"Layne, why don't you trust me? I'm not out to get you. I want to see you, I want to see your little girl. Liz wants to see you too. Layne don't be this way." She begged.

Layne sighed again. He looked out the window. He smiled when he saw Shannon standing in front of the trampoline. Laina had waved her hands for Shannon to come on the trampoline. Shannon shook his head no.

She appeared to be begging him and he threw his hands in the air. Layne chuckled as he saw Shannon roll onto the trampoline, and kick his shoes off. He stood up shakily on it and started jumping, losing his balance and falling.

Layne laughed to himself. Poor Shannon.

"Layne?" Nancy asked. "What's funny?"

"Nothing. Just watching my husband from my bedroom window. I got Laina this trampoline. He's never really jumped on one before and I just saw him get on it and fall." Layne chuckled.

"I wish you would let us come see you Layne. I wanna see your family." Nancy sighed.

Layne was silent.

"Mom. If I tell you where I am, you better not tell ANYONE. You understand? Only you and Liz can know, no one else. No friends, no husbands or whatever. I wanna stay as discreet in Seattle as possible. My life is perfect now, I don't want anything jeopardizing what I have here. I am so happy mom. Shannon makes me happy." Layne replied.

"I promise honey. I promise! When can we come see you?" Nancy exclaimed.

Layne smiled as he explained to Nancy where he was and they worked out when she and Liz would come see him. Layne looked out the window to see Shannon and Laina holding hands, jumping slowly. Eventually Laina let go of Shannon's hands and Shannon was jumping by himself, not very high, without losing his balance. Laina threw her arms in the air like she was cheering.

"Mom. I had twins a few months ago." Layne replied.

"You what? Layne? Oh my god..." Layne's mom exclaimed.

"Yeah, boys. Shayne and Zaine we named them." He smiled into the phone.

"Layne, you have been through so much. I can't wait to see you honey and see your children. I'm so happy, you've made me so happy Layne. I wish you would have let me be there for you while you were carrying those boys!" She smiled.

"So many things were going on mom. I'm sorry." Layne said softly.

"Shannon is such a nice boy Layne. I'm glad he's with you. He's really pulled you up. I can't wait to see your life now Layne. I'm really proud of you hon. I was so worried about you when you were on drugs. I hated seeing you living the way you were. I thought I was gonna lose you Layne." She cried.

"Shannon's my life mom. I live for him and these kids. I don't care about anything else anymore. I just want to be with my family. That's my drug now. My family." Layne said softly.

Layne's mom sobbed on the other end.

"Mom, c'mon, stop crying. You're coming to see me." Layne said softly into the phone.

"I know I know honey. I'm just so happy I finally got to speak with you, you sound wonderful. You sound happy." She smiled.

"I am happy mom. I'm real happy for the first time in my life.

They conversed for a few more minutes before Layne heard a baby start crying.

"Mom. Mom I gotta go. I'll talk to you later, baby's crying." He said into the phone.

"Oh Layne...okay. I love you honey." She said.

"Love you too mom. Bye." Layne said hanging up the phone.

He sat there for a minute, listening to the baby cry. He looked out the window down at Shannon and Laina. He laughed to himself as he saw Shannon jumping high now, appearing to have fun. He loved them both so much. He got up and went into the boy's room to check on them.

This time Zaine was asleep and Shayne was crying. Layne picked him up and smelled his diaper.

"Uh oh, diaper change." He cooed laying the boy on the changing table.

Layne smiled down at him as he prepared to change the baby's soiled diaper. He pursed his lips at the child and shushed him as he got to work, cleaning the baby's bottom and switching out the diaper.

Shayne calmed down as he put the fresh diaper on him. Layne threw the dirty one in the trash and then picked the baby up, holding him in the air and smiling at him before bringing him back down and kissing his forehead. He cradled Shayne in his arms and looked down at him. Shayne stared up at his father with big bright blue eyes. Shannon's big bright blue eyes.

"Your so beautiful, do you know that? Your very beautiful." Layne cooed at his baby.

He would have never imagined he'd be here right now, holding a baby, that was his.

He went over to the crib and carefully laid Shayne down, realizing that Zaine was awake now, looking up at Layne curiously. Layne smiled and put his finger in Zaine's little hand, leaning over the crib.

"You boys are so handsome. You look just like your daddy. Daddy's so handsome. I love daddy and I love you." Layne cooed, pursing his lips at his sons.

Zaine looked up at Layne and smiled, showing all of his gums. The smile spread to Shayne who also smiled at Layne. Their little arms and legs moving around rapidly.

Layne smiled down at his boys. They knew they were loved already.

"Layne?" Layne heard Shannon call from somewhere in the house.

"In here!" Layne leaned up and turned around and yelled.

He smiled as he looked back down at the babies. Shannon walked in the room and came up to Layne, putting his arm around Layne's waist. He smiled as he looked into the crib, seeing that both babies were awake.

"Aww you guys are so cute together. I love you!" Shannon cooed at the boys.

They smiled at Shannon and Shannon gasped.

"That's so amazing isn't it?" He smiled at Layne.

Layne leaned in and kissed Shannon softly.

"You're amazing babe." He said softly.

"Oh Layne...so how did the call with your mom go?" Shannon asked resting his head on Layne's shoulder.

"It was good. I'm letting her and my sister come see me, it that's alright." He said facing Shannon, putting his arms around Shannon's lower back.

"No I don't mind at all." Shannon said softly looking at his husband.

Layne leaned in and pressed his lips to Shannon's, kissing him softly. Shannon tilted his head and put his arms around Layne's neck. Layne sighed as their kiss began to get deeper. Shannon pulled away, breathing hard and looking at Layne.

"Why'd you pull away?" Layne pouted, licking his lips.

"We can't right now Layne. You know what's gonna happen as soon as we start. Laina will bang on the door or the babies will start crying." Shannon pouted.

"Just a quickie, in the bathroom. No penetration. Just our mouths Shannon." Layne whispered, kissing Shannon's lips.

Shannon bit his lip. "No Layne."

"C'mon...pleeease. You look so sexy right now. You big strong man. You fathered my children here. You're so strong." Layne whispered, running his hands down Shannon's arms.

Shannon shivered and closed his eyes. He looked in the crib at the boys who were falling asleep again. He pulled away from Layne and looked out the window to see Laina still jumping on the trampoline.

Shannon looked at Layne and sighed.

"Alright, but make this real quick. You know Laina's gonna be wondering where we're at." Shannon sighed.

Layne smiled and grabbed Shannon's hand. They walked out of the boy's bedroom and to their own bedroom, going in the bathroom and closing and locking the door behind them.

Layne pushed Shannon against the sink, pressing his lips to his, kissing him passionately. The two had not done anything sexual together in months. Layne was pining for Shannon. They desperately licked each other's tongues, Shannon moaning slightly. Layne managed to unbutton Shannon's shirt as they kissed sloppily. He ran his hands over Shannon's nipples, his shirt open and hanging down.

"Layne...your touch feels so good..." Shannon moaned as Layne moved his lips to Shannon's neck.

Shannon held onto the counter and tilted his head as Layne kissed the skin on his neck. Layne kissed down his neck and down his chest, stopping to swirl his tongue around both of Shannon's nipples. Shannon bit his lip and looked down as Layne started leaning down as his lips and tongue ran down his chest and stomach. Layne was on his knees before long, looking up at Shannon. He undid Shannon's belt quickly, unbuttoning the pants and unzipping them and shoving them down along with his boxers. They had to make this as quick as possible, there was no telling what would happen outside.

Layne looked up at Shannon, taking his partials out of his mouth and licking his lips. He gave better blow jobs without his teeth in. He opened his mouth, moving forward and sucking Shannon's tip into his mouth. He started fondling Shannon's testicles as he sucked Shannon's dick, his eyes falling closed and he moaned.

Shannon looked down, his stomach tight as Layne sucked him off. He bit his lip and shut his eyes tight, bucking his hips into Layne's face.

"Fuck Layne, feels good. Don't stop. This really is gonna be quick." Shannon breathed, clenching the edge of the sink with his hands.

Layne moaned, taking Shannon down his throat, moving back and forth along his shaft.

Shannon put his hands on Layne's head, throwing his head back and whimpering lightly as he busted his nut in his husband's mouth, fucking the man's face. Layne swallowed like the pro that he was. He quickly pulled off of Shannon's dick. Before Shannon could even speak, Layne was standing back up, his hands on Shannon's face, shoving his mouth against Shannon's kissing him hungrily. Layne was so horny he was shaking. They had to take advantage of any time they had together as it was so precious and rare with all of the children in the house now.

Shannon moaned lightly as Layne tongue fucked him. He could taste himself on Layne's mouth.

Layne pulled away, licking his lips. "Turn around Shannon, hurry." Layne muttered, quickly undoing his pants and shoving them down, along with his underwear.

Shannon turned around, putting his hands on their sink, looking back at Layne.

"You can't fuck me Layne, where's the lube?" Shannon asked, he didn't know what Layne was up to.

"Shut up!" Layne's voice cracked as Layne started rubbing his erection against Shannon's crevice.

Shannon bit his lip. "Layne, no fucking! No lube, no fucking!" Shannon whispered harshly, beginning to push Layne away.

"Stop it Shannon, I'm not gonna fuck you, I'm just grinding. Stop it I have to hurry before something happens!" Layne whispered harshly, shoving Shannon back against the counter.

Shannon looked in the mirror as Layne grinded his wet cock against his ass, using his hand to move his dick up and down. Layne had started thrusting his hips as well, throwing his head back and his mouth fell open.

Shannon smirked as he watched Layne behind him in the mirror. Layne was enjoying this. Shannon's body was shoved back and forth as Layne teased himself against Shannon.

Layne brought his head down to look at Shannon in the mirror, his brows furrowed.

"I'm so close babe. I'm so close." Layne wisped and moaned softly.

Shannon smirked, biting his lip and looking at Layne in the mirror.

Layne whimpered as he started shaking.

Suddenly as Shannon felt Layne's cum running down his ass and thighs, a loud knock was suddenly heard on the door and the doorknob started turning frantically.

"Daddy Layne? Daddy Shannon? Are you in there!? Daddy?" She started wining.

Layne wrapped his arms around Shannon's stomach, breathing hard as he rested his head on Shannon's back. Shannon laughed lightly to himself and shook his head.

"Laina, we're in here. I had to help Daddy Layne with something." Shannon called.

The doorknob turned frantically.

"I wanna help too. Daddy Layne you okay?" She exclaimed, whining and trying to open the door.

"I'm fine Laina. Go wait for us in the living room!" Layne breathed, smirking at Shannon in the mirror.

The doorknob stopped turning and they heard her footsteps.

Layne grabbed some tissue and started wiping Shannon's legs and ass off. He wiped his cock off and threw the tissues in the toilet. The two men fixed their clothes and looked at each other.

"Just in time." Shannon giggled as he buttoned his shirt back up.

Layne slid his partials back into his mouth.

"That little girl is so smart. Every time we try to go off alone together, she finds us." Layne smirked, kissing Shannon again.

"She just loves us Layne." Shannon smiled. "You are so sneaky. Luring me in here with your sweet talking."

Layne chuckled as they washed their hands.

"Well it worked didn't it? I fucking needed that." Layne smiled.

"Me too really." Shannon smiled.

They opened the door, checked on the babies and then went downstairs to reunite with Laina.

* * *

A few weeks later, Layne's mom and sister came to visit. Layne was shocked to see his sister was pregnant. The three caught up and Layne and Shannon had decided to have a barbeque. They invited Chris and Brad over. Everyone close to them was over there; Chris and Brad; Mama Nel, and Nancy and Liz.

Shannon's mom got to know Layne's mom. They thought it would be awkward but it wasn't at all. The two women seemed to be getting along fine. Layne's mother met Laina and the twins. Laina was really shy around her.

Everyone sat around Shannon's backyard, carrying on conversations. Shannon sipped his drink as he watched Layne carrying on a conversation with his sister. He pulled his shirt up, pointing at his scar and then they laughed together, and he felt on her stomach and smiled and kissed her cheek. Nancy and Nel were holding a conversation. Nancy was holding Shayne. Laina was sitting in Nel's lap and looking at her other grandma hold her little brother.

Brad was standing and holding Zaine, looking down at him with the sweetest smile. Chris was beside him smiling and looking at him then back to Zaine. Shannon wouldn't trade this for the world. His world was perfect.

Chris walked over to Shannon and smiled at him, putting his hand on his shoulder.

"You've got such a beautiful family Shannon. I'm so proud of you." He smiled.

"Thanks." Shannon smiled. "Brad really likes babies doesn't he? He looks so relaxed and calm with Zaine. It's like he's a natural."

They looked over at Brad. He lightly bounced the baby, speaking to him, kissing his forehead and smiling at him. He looked up at Shannon and Chris and smiled, turning around so Zaine was facing them. He picked up Zaine's little hand and made it wave at them.

Chris and Shannon smiled and waved back.

"Hey Shannon can we go in the kitchen for a sec?" Chris asked.

"Sure." Shannon replied softly, brows furrowed slightly. He wondered what this was about.

They went in the kitchen, Shannon sliding the backdoor closed. Chris walked into the living room out of site and Shannon followed.

"What's up Chris?" Shannon asked, running his hand through his hair.

Chris pulled his shirt up and looked at Shannon with furrowed brows. Shannon stared at Chris's stomach.

"Does that look funny to you?" He asked.

Shannon blinked and looked at Chris. He put his hand on Chris's stomach and pressed on it and gasped.

"Do you think that's a baby? Or is it just a beer gut?" Chris asked looking at Shannon desperate for help.

"You haven't been to the doctor?" Shannon asked, pressing on Chris's stomach again.

"Well...no. I don't know what doctor to go to. I don't even know if there's anything in there." Chris mumbled looking at Shannon.

"Chris...you definitely are. I mean, look at your belly button...you look pretty far along. Do you have any symptoms? Like morning sickness or anything out of the ordinary?"

Chris pulled his shirt back down. "Well no. Nothing. I don't feel anything...I...shit!"

Chris quickly pulled his shirt back up. I have this weird feeling sometimes right here, like, I feel it now."

Chris replied, pointing to the side of his stomach.

"Does it feel like, a fluttering feeling?" Shannon asked as Chris put his shirt back down.

Chris nodded slowly, pouting at Shannon. Shannon smiled at him.

"Your fucking pregnant Chris. Holy fuck, this is so crazy. You have the gene too!"

Chris looked at Shannon with a sad look.

"Let me guess, Brad doesn't know? Shit Chris, you need to go to a doctor as soon as possible. I hope nothing's wrong with your baby. You need vitamins and stuff." Shannon said excitedly.

"You need to tell Brad."

"I don't know if I want this baby Shannon." Chris said softly.

"What? No way Chris, c'mon don't say that. You do want it. You saw Brad out there with Zaine. He'll be a loving father. He'll support you."

"But we're not even married yet. He'll be mad at me for not telling him sooner. I don't know what to do Shannon. I don't know what doctor to go to. I'm so confused." Chris started crying.

Shannon hugged him and put his face against his hair.

"I can help you Chris. I'll help you, like you helped me. Don't be scared. It's going to be alright. Don't talk about getting rid of this baby, children are a blessing. I love all my children. This is the best thing that ever happened to you."

"What about our band? Brad loves the band, he wouldn't want anything holding him down from the band." Chris cried.

Didn't have any symptoms? He sure did have the hormones.

"How do you even know how he's gonna react if you haven't told him yet?" Shannon cooed. "Everything's gonna be alright. You need to make an appointment with a doctor first of all. ASAP. I can give you the number. There are doctors here that can help you. These aren't the dark ages anymore Chris. It is the new millennium you now." Shannon smiled.

Chris looked at Shannon and smiled and sniffled. "Thanks Shannon. You're my best friend."

Shannon smiled and hugged Chris and they swayed back and forth as they hugged. Suddenly Layne walked in.

"Hey, what are you two doing in here? Come back outside." He said, looking at them with furrowed brows.

Chris pulled away from Shannon and smiled shyly at Layne.

"We were just talking, we're going back outside now." Shannon smiled.

Chris shyly walked past Layne and left out. Layne looked at Shannon and came up to him and smiled.

"What was he doing putting his hands all over you baby?" Layne joked, wrapping his arms around Shannon.

"Nothing Layne. Get this. Chris is pregnant." Shannon whispered. "Brad doesn't even know. Chris came to me asking for help. He wasn't even sure if he was, but you should see his stomach. He looks like he's 5 months along!"

Layne's eyes widened.

"5 months? How do you not know?" He whispered back.

"He's just really confused. I told him he needs to tell Brad. He's real scared."

"Aww Shannon. I hope they can work it out." Layne smiled.

"Me too." Shannon smiled.

They walked back out into the little barbeque.

Chris was sitting down holding Zaine now and Brad was jumping on the trampoline with Laina. They sat around Chris. Layne couldn't stop smiling at Chris.

"What?" Chris said, smiling a little.

He then realized.

"Shannon! Stop telling everybody!" Chris whispered harshly.

"Sorry, you know I had to tell Layne!" I whispered back.

"Give me my baby please." Layne smiled holding his arm out.

Chris smiled and handed Zaine over to Layne.

* * *

The little get together lasted all day. Shannon had a blast hanging out with his family and friends.

Later that night, Layne and Shannon lay in their bedroom. Laina was asleep. The babies were fast asleep. Nancy and Liz were asleep in the guest bedroom.

Layne and Shannon were cuddled up on the bed together.

"I fucking love my life." Layne said looking over at Shannon.

"I love you, I love Laina, I love Shayne and I love Zaine." He smiled, kissing Shannon's cheek after saying each line.

Shannon giggled and picked up the picture of them that was on his nightstand.

"I fucking love us too." Shannon smiled and giggled, pointing to their most recent family portrait.

Layne was sitting on the living room couch, his eyes crossed, brows furrowed, mouth wide open, making a funny face with the twins in his arms. Shannon was on the left side of Layne with his lips pressed to Layne's cheek, and Laina was on the other side, her arms wrapped around Layne's neck, pressing her lips to his other cheek.

"Your so goofy honey. I love this picture, we all look so happy."

Shannon set it back on the nightstand and when he turned around, Layne had kissed him.

"I can't thank you enough for saving me Shannon. We've come so fucking far. I love you so fucking much. I fucking cherish you and these kids." Layne said looking deep into Shannon's eyes.

Shannon wrapped his arms around Layne's neck and sobbed lightly.

* * *

3 Years Later

Shannon spoke into the intercom of his studio.

"Rolling baby." He said softly.

He pressed the record button.

Layne sat on a stool in front of the microphone, the guitar in his lap. He started strumming it, a ring on each of his fingers. His eyes were covered with dark sunglasses. His hair was medium length and curly by now, dyed blue but faded to light blue. He had a goatee again, long and braided. He had on a long sleeved dark blue shirt that had three buttons on the collar, and tight ripped jeans and brown cowboy boots which his jeans covered. He was wearing a cross necklace. He started strumming his guitar and he started singing into the microphone.

There was a band behind him as he sung into the microphone. Shannon watched Layne intently through the glass. This was the first time Layne had been in a studio since 1998. Layne really wanted to get out there again. He was ready. He decided to first record a small LP that would be available on something new called I-Tunes, for people to download. They would see how bad people wanted to hear from Layne before they went into something bigger like a full album.

Shannon was pretty much Layne's manager. Shannon was the only person Layne trusted.

Shannon almost cried as Layne's voice filled the room. His voice was not what it once was, but he could still sing. The drugs had slightly changed it. Layne kept his eyes closed as he strummed the guitar. He had gotten very good at playing guitar during his hiatus.

Shannon messed with the buttons as he watched his husband play a soft slow, acoustic version of a Bee Gee's song. Eddie Vedder was in the booth with them, playing acoustic guitar and he had a few guys playing with them that they could trust.

Somehow along the way they had reconnected with Eddie. Eddie had a family of his own with his bandmate Jeff. They had a big family, 5 girls and one boy. Their boy was around Laina's age.

Shannon smiled as Eddie sang back up vocals with Layne into another Mike. The song was turning out beautiful.

Layne had chose a few cover songs to do that he felt really defined what he had been feeling over the past few years.

As Layne and Eddie finished out the song, Layne sang the last line, the guitar sound fading out as they hit their strings and let the sound fade. Shannon hit stop and talked to them again.

"That was absolutely fucking beautiful guys. Layne that was perfect."

Shannon felt like he was going to cry. Layne got up and came out of the studio and up to Shannon.

"I need you in here babe. Where's what's his face?" Layne said softly.

"Rodney? I'll go get him babe. You're doing real great. Beautiful covers." Shannon smiled, standing up and pressing a kiss to Layne's lips.

Shannon got up and fetched Rodney. Rodney had since been hired to work at Shannon's studio. He got behind the controls and a chair was brought into the recording booth so Shannon could sit with Layne. Layne needed Shannon to sit with him as he sang the next song.

Shannon gave Eddie a hug and a kiss on the cheek as he entered the recording booth. He shook the other band members hands and he sat beside Layne. Layne put the headphones back on. He smiled at Shannon and took Shannon's hand, the other hand pressed to his headphones as he sat there getting ready to sing.

Shannon sat sideways looking at him, holding his hand with both of his hands.

Recording started and Eddie started to play an acoustic beat. The drummer started playing a beat. Layne squeezed Shannon's hand as he started belting out a Carpenter's song that meant alot to him.

Eddie sang back up vocals. Shannon put his hand over his mouth, his one hand still holding Layne's as Layne began to belt out the lyrics. Shannon realized Layne had chose this song for him. He was pretty much singing about him. Shannon couldn't stop the tears from falling down his face as he watched Layne sing.

__  
After long enough of being alone  
Everyone must face their share of loneliness  
In my own time nobody knew  
The pain I was goin' through  
And waitin' was all my heart could do 

_Hope was all I had until you came_  
Maybe you can't see how much you mean to me  
You were the dawn breaking the night  
The promise of morning light  
Filling the world surrounding me  
When I hold you 

_Baby, baby, feels like maybe, things will be all right  
Baby, baby, your love's made me_

_Free as a song, singin' forever_

_Only yesterday when I was sad and I was lonely_  
You showed me the way to leave the past and all its tears behind me  
Tomorrow maybe even brighter than today  
Sinc I threw my sadness away  
Only yesterday 

_I have found my home here in your arms_  
Nowhere else on earth I'd really rather be  
Life waits for us, share it with me  
The best is about to be  
So much is left for us to see  
When I hold you 

_Baby, baby, feels like maybe, things will be all right_

_Baby, baby, your love's made me  
Free as a song, singin' forever_

_Only yesterday when I was sad and I was lonely_  
You showed me the way to leave the past and all its tears behind me  
Tomorrow maybe even brighter than today  
Since I threw my sadness away  
Only yesterday  


Layne's version was slower and more acoustic. Instead of a fading ending, all the music stopped as he sang the last line acapella. He dragged out the last word, and when he was done, recording had stopped and he opened his eyes and blinked.

The vibe in the room was intense. Everyone realized something very magical and rare was occurring here. Shannon nearly tackled Layne as he hugged him and kissed his temple. Layne smiled and wrapped his arms around Shannon.

He knew if other people weren't in there, the shades would be off and Layne would be all over him. Some aspects of Layne hadn't changed over the years.

"That was so beautiful. Thank you, I love it." Shannon whispered in Layne's ear.

Layne smiled and flipped his notes in front of him.

"I wanna do a duet with you Shannon. Let's sing this song." Layne said softly, pointing to his notebook.

"Do you know that one?" Layne asked softly.

"Yeah, you sure you can hit those notes though?" I asked softly.

"No. You'll sing it. I'll be the background vocals." Layne said softly.

Shannon bit his lip. "You tricked me baby."

"So. Do it. Please." Layne begged.

"Okay." Shannon sighed.

"Guys, Calling you!" Layne looked back and exclaimed.

Eddie tuned his guitar up a bit and everyone fine tuned their instruments.

Shannon sat in Layne's lap, putting on some headphones and held them.

He cleared his voice, warming it up a bit, testing the chorus as he sang it to himself.

"You sound good baby." Layne said softly.

Shannon looked at Rodney and nodded. They were rolling again and suddenly the band started playing. Layne kept his arms wrapped around Shannon's waist as Shannon began to belt out the lyrics to the cover tune "Calling You." Layne sang the background vocals as Shannon belted into the mike.

Everybody watched in awe as the two sang together, the song coming out perfect in one take. Shannon looked at Layne once they finished and kissed him and smiled.

Shannon took over the controls again as they got prepared to sing the next song. Layne just had to play "Solitaire." It was after all, the first lullaby he had ever sung to his daughter. At the time he was listening to it, his life was not good but when he first sang that song to his daughter on the first day he spent with her, he was in love.

Layne was doing something he rarely did. Eddie broke out the keyboard and was playing it as Layne sang over it. This song was for his daughter. He wanted to record it so she could listen to it in his voice forever.

Shannon had chills running through his spine as they recorded Layne's version of this. He hoped people didn't act like douchebags when this came out. This was raw, authentic Layne here. He was doing this to prepare himself for coming back out into the music world.

Shannon came back in the studio with Layne to help him sing the last song for the EP. Rodney took over once again. People were probably going to think Layne was weird for doing a cover song for one of his old band's songs. But the song meant alot to him. He realized the lyrics in the song pretty much described his life.

Eddie had stepped out now and watched behind the booth as Layne and Shannon played guitars together with the rest of the band, to create a more acoustic, slower version of "Down In A Hole."

__  
Bury me softly in this womb  
I kept this part of me from you  
Sand rains down and here I sit  
Holding rare flowers  
In a tomb... in bloom 

_Down in a hole and I don't know if I can be saved_  
See my heart I decorate it like a grave  
Well you don't understand who they  
Thought I was supposed to be  
Look at me now I'm a man  
Who won't let himself be 

_Down in a hole, feelin so small_  
Down in a hole, losin my soul  
I'd like to fly,  
But my wings have been so denied 

_Down in a hole and they've put all_  
The stones in their place  
I've eaten the sun so my tongue  
Has been burned of the taste  
I have been guilty  
Of kicking myself in the teeth  
I will speak no more  
Of my feelings beneath 

_Down in a hole, feelin so small_  
Down in a hole, losin my soul  
I'd like to fly but my  
Wings have been so denied 

_Bury me softly in this womb_  
Oh I want to be inside of you  
I give this part of me for you  
Oh I want to be inside of you  
Sand rains down and here I sit  
Holding rare flowers (Oh I want to be inside of you)  
In a tomb... in bloom  
Oh I want to be inside... 

_Down in a hole, feelin so small_  
Down in a hole, losin my soul  
Down in a hole, feelin so small  
Down in a hole, outta control  
I'd like to fly but my  
Wings have been so denied  


Everyone clapped and cheered as the session wrapped up. Everyone gathered around Layne, patting him on his back and congratulating him. He smiled, his shades hiding his eyes. He ran his hand through his curly light blue locks and looked over at Shannon whom was smiling back at him.

* * *

Layne's LP was self-titled. He hadn't the slightest idea what to call it. It was just something from him, showing the world he was still here and anything those goons had ever wrote about him was not true.


	11. 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A look into the future of the Staley family

2010, Epilogue

Layne had on a backstage pass. He had his arms wrapped around Laina. Laina was now 16, and she was in a band who aptly called themselves "Japanese Voyeurs". They had already made a first album.

All the songs were co-written by Laina and Eddie Vedder's son, Eli Vedder. Laina and Eli had been friends for a long time and had started jamming together and one thing led to another and now they had their band. Layne was their manager and helping them out.

Layne held onto his daughter and smiled down at her. She looked up at him. She was no longer the blonde curly haired child that he had first met years ago.

Now Laina was tall like a model. She had long limbs just like Layne. Her hair was long and straightened, dyed black with blonde tips. She had perfectly arched eyebrows and eyeshadow on her eyes. She wore a white fishnet tanktop with her black bra on showing through it. She wore tight capris and black vans slip ons. Her arms were adorned with black bracelets and she had black fingernail polish.

"When's daddy coming? I really want him to be here." She pouted looking up at Layne.

"Shannon just called. Their flight ran a little late. He was on his way here the last time he texted me sweetie." Layne smiled, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

Laina loved Layne. She still loved to hug him and let him kiss her in front of everyone. Layne was special to her. She knew her dad had been through alot in his life. They had a special bond together, she could discuss anything with Layne.

The time for their set came and Shannon was still not there. Laina felt sad. She wanted both of her dads to be there for this. This gig was very important. Layne had worked magic and got them a slot on a big festival.

Laina put on her guitar. Eli and the rest of the band came around. They did their preshow ritual. They used Laina's dad to their advantage. Layne had his shades on as he walked onto the stage, waving. The crowd went wild.

He walked up to the microphone and looked into the crowd.

"Hey guys, how's it going out there? Glad to see some of you made it out here this early." He smiled, looking around at the small crowd around the stage.

"You guys are in for something special. The lead singer of this band is my daughter. Let's hear it for Japanese Voyeurs!"

The crowd cheered. People were still being let into the festival. The crowd started gathering though. They needed as much publicity as they could get to get themselves out there and build a following.

Layne stood on stage and clapped and watched as the kids filed out onto the stage. He looked at Laina and smiled. He leaned down and kissed her lips. She walked up to the microphone.

"Give it up for my dad!" She smiled, pointing to Layne.

The crowd cheered. Layne smiled and waved as he walked off the stage. He stood on the side of the stage and watched as they started performing their first song, "Smother Me."

Layne sang all the words as Laina sung them. He watched them intently. Laina ran her hands through her hair as she sang the opening lines, then grabbed her guitar and started playing as the sound got louder. The crowd cheered.

Layne really liked this song, it was dark and creepy. Laina sounded like Shannon but over something that he would have written back in the day.

Once that song ended, they jumped right into the next song, "X-Ray Ted."

Layne headbanged as he listened to it. The music to this one was definitely different. It was wild. He loved it. Laina shook her hips as she sang and played guitar, screaming into the microphone.

Layne smiled as he looked at the crowd and they seemed to be getting into it. That was a good sign. He was so proud of them. They were a tight band.

"You guys are great, really." Laina breathed after the song was over.

Eli strummed his guitar. Laina stepped back and looked over at Layne. He smiled and waved. She smiled and they started playing "Crybaby."

Layne looked at the time. "Where are you Shannon." He sighed. He continued to watch their performance.

A few minutes later, Layne felt someone touch the small of his back. He looked over to see Shannon. He felt a sigh of relief as he wrapped his arms around his husband. Shannon had grown his hair back out again. He had it pulled back into a ponytail. He had on shades as well. He smiled and spoke to Layne.

"Sorry I'm late, traffic was fucking terrible. How is it?" He said in Layne's ear.

"It's going good. The crowd really seems to be into it!" Layne smiled.

Laina finished out the song and the crowd cheered. She looked over and saw Shannon standing there. She spoke into the microphone.

"Daddy! Hi! My dad Shannon's here guys!" She pointed to the side of the stage.

Shannon waved. He didn't want to go on stage. He blushed and stayed back.

They were getting ready to play the next song, starting to play the chords when suddenly Shayne and Zaine ran on stage screaming Laina's name.

The two boys were 9 now and they were a handful. They were constantly getting into trouble and that's why Shannon had gray hairs on his head now.

"Boys!" Shannon exclaimed, frowning.

They ran over to Laina and hugged her and the band stopped playing.

"Guys! Aww." She smiled patting their heads.

Both boys had medium length hair and were spitting images of Shannon.

Shannon blushed as he ran onstage and grabbed their hands, dragging them away from Laina. He scolded them when he got back to the side of the stage. They pouted and hugged Layne's legs as the family continued to watch Laina's performance.

"My little brothers. They miss me. Let's try this again." Laina smiled.

The drumbeat started. They started playing the gem of their album, "Milk Teeth."

Layne felt like this was the best song and he was so glad that Shannon was there to see her playing it.

"What's she got on?" Shannon asked Layne.

"She's a rockstar babe." Layne smiled.

"Yeah but its...see through. You can fucking see her bra through it!" Shannon exclaimed.

"Shannon...chill out!" Layne sighed.

Shannon was constantly worried about his daughter. He really didn't want to let her start a band at such a young age, but Layne was persistent.

Laina shook her hips as she sung the chorus, bouncing around.

The song would get quiet and then it would get loud as she screamed "Milk Teeth" into the microphone.

Layne was headbanging and the twins were too. Shannon smiled and banged his head lightly. His daughter was beautiful out there. He was so proud of her.

Once that song was finished, they were allowed one more song. They chose to end the set with "Double Cheese."

"Daddy Layne's gonna come out here and sing this with me." Laina smiled into the microphone.

The crowd cheered. All of a sudden people started gathering around to see Layne singing with his daughter.

Layne walked onstage and smiled standing beside his daughter. Shannon put his arms around the twins as they stood on either side of him. He smiled as he watched his husband and his daughter.

Layne and Laina started headbanging as the band started playing the riff. Laina sang the verse and Layne started joining in when Laina sang "Oh god I feel love like you hate me."

They started headbanging again. Layne was having the time of his life up there with his daughter. She was so bad ass.

They were singing the song together now. Layne had to bend down slightly to sing in the mike because he was so tall.

During the climax, Laina grabbed her boobs, squeezing them as she sung it. Shannon wasn't very comfortable with this. Laina and Layne moaned and groaned into the mike and then the big guitar solo started.

Eli came up to them and was shredding, Laina as well and Layne headbanged as he watched them.

The crowd was going crazy. Layne eventually stopped headbanging and stood there as Laina and Eli were facing each other, shredding. He clapped his hands and smiled.

Finally the song ended and the crowd cheered.

Laina ran up to the mike.

"Thank you, you were great. Our cd's are on sale at our merch booth." She smiled.

They all walked off stage. A roadie took Laina's guitar off. She came up to Shannon and hugged him.

"Daddy I'm so glad you showed up. I miss you alot. It's so good to see you." She smiled.

Shannon hugged his daughter.

"You were so great out there honey. I'm very impressed. You sounded really good." Shannon smiled, keeping his arm around her.

"Thanks daddy." She smiled kissing Shannon's cheek.

Layne grabbed the twin's hands and Laina walked with her arm around Shannon as the family exited the stage. The rest of the guys in the band were going to run the merch stand. If Layne and Shannon was over there, it would attract the fake fans who just wanted to see Layne or Shannon.

The family had been split apart for the past 3 months while Laina and Layne were on tour with her band. Shannon stayed home with the twins to take care of them. This was the first time they had all seen each other in 3 months.

They all decided to grab a bite to eat and catch up.

Plans were revealed around their dinner table. Shannon was reuniting with Blind Melon to make a new album. Jerry Cantrell had met up with Layne at one of Laina's shows. He and Layne had had a long talk and had put old rifts behind them. They were both different people now and eventually Alice in Chains was going to get started up again. Laina's band would do more touring. Whether it be with Blind Melon or Alice In Chains they were going on tour with her dads.

The twins would most likely be going on tour with Shannon and Blind Melon, getting home schooled. They had to work out all the details.

The future was looking bright for the Staley family.


End file.
